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Posts tagged with “feelings”

5 Ways Journaling Can Help You Get Through the Hard Stuff

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“In the journal I do not just express myself more openly than I could to any person; I create myself. The journal is a vehicle for my sense of selfhood. It represents me as emotionally and spiritually independent. Therefore (alas) it does not simply record my actual, daily life but rather—in many cases—offers an alternative to it.” ~Susan Sontag

My first journal was born into existence when I was twelve. I remember carefully choosing my favorite comics, pictures from magazines, and the odd scribble I’d drawn. Tongue stuck out in concentration, gluing them strategically on an unused exercise book. …

Don’t Wait for Your Feelings to Change

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Never Apologize for How You Feel

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4 Tips for Raising Happy, Emotionally Healthy Children

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“Emotional intelligence begins to develop in the earliest years. All the small exchanges children have with their parents, teachers, and with each other carry emotional messages.” ~Daniel Goleman

I consider myself an expert on the emotional needs of children. Mostly because I was one.

No one goes into parenthood anticipating the ways they will psychologically damage their children. At least I don’t think they do. I hope not. It’s far more likely that most go into parenthood wanting the best for their children, hoping to do more for them than their own parents were able to do.

So, why is …

How We Avoid Our Feelings and How Embracing Them Sets Us Free

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“We numb our minds and heart so one need not be broken and the other need not be bothered.” ~Peggy Haymes

Feelings are important, no doubt about it. They communicate all sorts of information to us. I don’t know about you, but I’ve preferred to ignore some of that information. Raise your hand if you would much rather feel the good feelings and just jump right over the not so good ones.

Okay, so it’s unanimous. We all prefer the good, happy feelings. I expect we are all experts at finding ways to avoid the uncomfortable ones. But …

How to Deal with Painful Emotional Triggers in Your Relationships

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“A comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there.” ~Unknown

I’ve been looking for a new job, so I recently decided to update my resume.

“Hun, can you please help me with that?”

“Of course, my love.”

“Thanks, babe.”

Not only did my wife help me revamp my resume, she drafted me a killer cover letter as well.

“You’re the best, babe!”

“Happy to help, sweetie.”

I opened the cover letter the other day and found a discrepancy, something that immediately touched my deepest core wound.

There, at the bottom of the page, where my name, …

Feelings Are Just Visitors

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Gratitude: The Antidote for Painful Feelings and Fuel for Happiness

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“The struggle ends when the gratitude begins.” ~Neale Donald Walsch

The longer I travel on my journey, the more I realize that gratitude is the universal antidote to painful feelings. In fact, it’s the quickest route I know to happiness, which makes it a good idea to be grateful all day long.

However, when we are in a low mood or something knocks us off course, it can be easy to forget just how many amazing things there are in our lives to be grateful for, even just in one single day. It’s as if a setback erases our …

A Surprising Way to Let Go of Painful Feelings and the Past

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“We do not heal the past by dwelling there; we heal the past by living fully in the present.” ~Marianne Williamson

I’ve struggled with it.

Letting go, I mean. I’ve struggled with moving on from my past. I’ve struggled with ridding myself of guilt, shame, and grief. I’ve struggled with freeing myself from mistakes, past relationships, and worries about the future.

It’s not that I haven’t tried. Believe me, I’ve tried really hard. I’ve written goodbye letters, mentally cut the energetic cords, and fiercely gone back into the pain to free myself fully from it. I’ve cried my eyes …

It’s Okay to Cry

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“We need never be ashamed of our tears.” ~Charles Dickens

We have all cried, all of us, some more than others.

But today I am not here to divide us by the liters of tears we have shed.

Today I want to unite us because we are all the same.

We all feel sad, stressed, overwhelmed, scared, and frustrated at times.

Any stay-at-home parent would understand my frustration, my misery, and my overwhelmed days.

It has eaten me up on the inside. I have been staying at home for the past seven years, looking after my kids, with no face-to-face …

Thoughts Fuel Emotions

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Whatever You’re Feeling, It Will Eventually Pass

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Why We Need to Stop Judging Our Feelings

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“Your emotions are meant to fluctuate, just like your blood pressure is meant to fluctuate. It’s a system that’s supposed to move back and forth, between happy and unhappy. That’s how the system guides you through the world.” ~Daniel Gilbert

As a highly sensitive person I experience emotions very deeply, though it’s not usually obvious to others that I’m having such strong internal reactions.

For those not familiar with this trait, high sensitivity is not a defect or a personality flaw; it simply means that you experience sensory and emotional input more strongly than non-sensitive people.

Of course, this …

You Are Not Responsible for Anyone Else’s Emotions

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“Rather than being your thoughts and emotions, be the awareness behind them.” ~Eckhart Tolle

“I don’t believe you,” I jutted out my chin like a petulant toddler. Collapsing back into the tufted leather loveseat, I conceded, “I want to believe you, but I can’t.”

My therapist had just explained to me that I am not responsible for regulating other people’s emotions. My mind couldn’t process this truth.

There were too many decades of owning the moods of those around me.

In my younger years, if a parent was stressed, I felt it was up to me to calm them down. …

How to Confront Someone When You’re Afraid of Conflict

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“Peace is not the absence of conflict, but the presence of creative alternatives for responding to conflict.” ~Dorothy Thompson

I used to think that in order to live a completely peaceful existence, there could never be any conflict in my life, so I would do anything possible to avoid it.

That included selling myself short, never sticking up for myself, and effectively compromising my value. That didn’t seem like the road to peace.

The odd time I did say something, it still felt like a losing situation because I never felt I actually gained anything.

Conflict scared me. It made …

The Power of Doing Nothing When You’re Frustrated or Anxious

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“This ‘doing nothing’ is not a cold, passive resignation, but is a luminous, sacred activity, infused with presence and a wild sort of compassion. It is a radical act of kindness and love.” ~Matt Licata

I am storming home after work.

The important men in my life are driving me bonkers—they’ve been self-important, disrespectful, condescending jerks.

My dad doesn’t see the value in the work I do, and my partner blew off our date to take an important phone call. My younger brother leapt off of the phone with me, which he’s been doing every time I’ve called in the …

How Dealing with Our Emotions Can Help us Heal Chronic Pain

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“The part can never be well unless the whole is well.” ~Plato

Our bodies are clever. They constantly send us messages that something isn’t right. It’s our job to tune in, listen, and act on these messages.

That headache, tight shoulders, and backache are all trying to tell us something. But sometimes the physical symptoms we experience are actually tied up in a deeper emotional pain that needs to be dealt with first.

How do I know this? It was a message I needed to learn, one that I now teach to others.

Six years ago my life fell apart…

How to Defeat Your Insecurities and Tell Someone You Love Them

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“Our own ego judges us, so we become afraid of self-awareness. If it’s not puffing us up to look better than others, it’s tearing us down—anything to block us from feeling at one with reality and who we are.” ~Beth Maynard Green

Have you ever had insecurities stand in your way?

Have you ever felt afraid to tell someone how you feel?

Have you ever felt like someone could never love you the same way you love them?

We all have insecurities that hold us back in our professional life, our social life, and most of all, our love life…

A Simple Way to Calm Yourself When Feeling Strong Emotions

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“This is the root of Self. You are not your thoughts; you are aware of your thoughts. You are not your emotions; you feel your emotions…. You are the conscious being who is aware that you are aware of all these inner and outer things.” ~Michael Singer

I sat across from my colleague with a growing sense of discomfort. I had accepted an assignment from the boss, but I heard from my colleague an undercurrent of questioning and uncertainty—or so it seemed. It was so subtle that I couldn’t quite tell what was going on.

Did she not believe I …

In My World There Are No Bad Kids

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Source: Positive Parenting: Toddlers and Beyond