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Sometimes Letting Go Is the Ultimate Act of Love

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“Sometimes letting go is the ultimate act of love—both for the other person and for yourself.” ~Unknown

I never imagined that the same classroom where I found love would become the first chapter of a story about letting go.

Ten years ago, as an undergraduate student full of dreams and certainty, I met him. We were classmates first, then friends, and finally, lovers who thought we’d conquered the dating game by finding our perfect match so young.

During our college years, our bond seemed unshakeable. We even chose to intern in the same city, not wanting distance to separate …

My Quiet Breakthrough: 3 Self-Care Lessons That Changed Everything

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“Rest and self-care are so important. When you take time to replenish your spirit, it allows you to serve others from the overflow. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.” ~Eleanor Brownn

My breaking point came on a Monday morning at 6 a.m.

It had been the same routine for months: up at 5 a.m., brush my teeth, put on my workout clothes, move my body, weigh myself.

On this morning, the scale’s numbers glared back, stubborn as ever. My reflection in the mirror seemed foreign—tired eyes, face still sweaty, a body that felt like a lead weight. Outside, cars …

What Happened When I Let Go of My Big Plan

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“Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be.” ~Sonia Ricotti

Turning fifty felt like a milestone worth celebrating—a time to honor myself, reflect on my five decades of life, and embrace the journey ahead.

For someone who had never believed I was worth the fuss of a big celebration, choosing to honor myself in this way felt like a profound shift. I wanted this celebration to affirm that I am worth the effort and expense.

The way I envisioned this milestone? Hosting a retreat for women like me, who were born in 1975 …

Life After Abuse: A Story of Hope and Healing

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TRIGGER WARNING: This post deals with an account of domestic violence and may be triggering to some.

Growing up, I learned early on how to be aware of the little things that spoke volumes. My mom wasn’t just an alcoholic; she was also bipolar, and I never knew if I’d come home to a mom who was cheerful and loving or to one who would say hurtful things and obsess over cleaning.

I grew up in AA, surrounded by people trying to rebuild their lives. My parents were both recovering alcoholics, and while I didn’t fully understand it at …

From Awkward to Authentic: How to Show Up as Your True Self in Love and Life

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“Don’t make yourself small for anyone. Be the awkward, funny, intelligent, beautiful little weirdo that you are. Don’t hold back. Weird it out.” ~Unknown

You know that moment when you’re mid-conversation, and your brain throws up a flashing neon sign that says, “Abort mission! Abort mission!”

Meanwhile, you’re left replaying your words like a bad karaoke performance, cringing at every note.

Or when you’re swiping through dating profiles and mutter, “Why does everyone here look like they’re auditioning for a toothpaste ad?” We’ve all been there. Here’s the thing… we’re so darn busy trying to present a polished, “perfect” version …

How to Reclaim Your Power After Being Denigrated or Disrespected

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“As they become known to and accepted by us, our feelings and the honest exploration of them become sanctuaries and spawning grounds for the most radical and daring of ideas.” ~Audre Lorde

The high-speed train barreled through the Japanese countryside. Craning my neck to take in the scenery, excitement fluttered in my tummy. I was twenty-eight years old and living my dream of being a professional singer.

My duo partner, Caroline, and I had just completed a month onstage at the Intercontinental Hotel in Manila, Philippines. A twenty-piece orchestra backed our forty-five-minute show, an entertaining mix of Motown hits, 80s …

3 Questions to Ask Yourself Before Trying Something New

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“New beginnings are often disguised as painful endings.” ~Lao Tzu

During the Great Recession I lost my business. And I was devastated.

My business partner and I built the company from an idea we were kicking around over wine into a thriving brand strategy agency. We had twenty employees. We had a cool studio office. We were winning creative awards competing against agencies many, many times our size. And then—slowly at first and then so, so fast—it was over.

I remember when I called time of death. We had yet another client come in and say they couldn’t pay us …

Grief Has No Rules: Love, Loss, and Letting Go

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“Grief never ends … But it changes. It’s a passage, not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness, nor a lack of faith. It is the price of love.” ~Unknown

“Thank you for letting me know.” The moment I hung up the phone, the tears came. I was confused and caught off guard. Why was I crying over the death of my ex-husband?

We’d separated six years ago. I had a new partner and hadn’t thought much about him in over three years. So why did his death hit me so hard?

Big Girls Don’t Cry

…

The Secret to Changing Your Relationship with Food

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Anyone who knows me well knows that I battled with food and my body for years.

I struggled with bulimia for over a decade, starting when I was twelve. My eating disorder was in many ways a coping mechanism in response to trauma, but early programming around food didn’t help.

I ate to soothe myself. I ate to stuff down my feelings. And as a bulimic, I ate to feel the control I felt when I was able to reverse the process of consumption.

Though I technically recovered in my early twenties, I spent many years after that sticking to …

Escaping Escapism: From Drinking to Scrolling to Being Present

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“Sit with it. Instead of drinking it away, smoking it away, sleeping it away, eating it away, or running from it. Just sit with it. Healing happens by feeling.” ~Unknown

I had no idea I had so many feelings until four years ago. I became sober and immediately started overflowing with emotions—emotions I never knew I had.

I stopped drinking just over a month after my twenty-fifth birthday, in January of 2021. I drank a lot in college, often going out Thursday, Friday, and Saturday nights every week. Once I graduated, though, my drinking mellowed. I was still going out, …

How to Finally Believe That You Are Enough

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“We often block our own blessings because we don’t feel inherently good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, or worthy enough. But you’re worthy because you are born and because you are here. Your being alive makes worthiness your birthright. You alone are enough.” ~Oprah Winfrey

When I was a little girl, I loved making cute drawings at school and gifting them to friends and family. I’d pour my heart into them, and at the end of the day, I’d rush home, all excited to give my treasured creations. I was such a happy kid! Always running and jumping up and …

The Value of Doing Nothing in a Hyperproductive World

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“Allow yourself to be bored a little. In our world full of distractions, create some space for nothingness.” ~Unknown

My roommate sat in the kitchen, eating his late home-cooked dinner, and commented with a half-mocking smile, “Ah, you’re still living.”

The words hung in the air, awkwardly playful but sharp enough to sting. They echoed something larger: the subtle judgment that creeps into our culture of relentless productivity.

Confusion bubbled up inside me, followed quickly by shame. My cheeks turned red. I had spent most of this sunny Saturday alone in my room—reading books, listening to music, writing a little, …

When Love Isn’t Enough: The Lessons I Learned from my Breakup

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“This is not where your story ends. It’s simply where it takes a turn you didn’t expect.” ~Cheryl Strayed

He had the courage to say what I couldn’t.

“It’s not working anymore.”

It didn’t make any sense that we were breaking up. We loved each other so much. We had been talking about getting engaged. Our couples therapy was moving in a positive direction, even when it was really challenging.

When he said those words, I knew I wasn’t going to argue with him. As much as we loved each other, we had taken the relationship as far as …

How I Found Confidence and a New Path When I Felt Inadequate

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“Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.” ~Arthur Ashe

It was a quiet evening at Boat Quay. The sun was setting, casting warm golden hues over the water, and the air smelled faintly of salt and street food. I was sitting on the riverbank with a close friend, my head heavy with thoughts that refused to settle.

“I’m thirty,” I said, breaking the silence. My voice quivered with frustration. “I haven’t achieved anything. Look at Joseph Schooling—he’s younger than me and a gold medalist! My other friend started his own business. And me? I’m just… …

When You’re Ready for More: How to Access Your Inner Wanderer

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“Not all who wander are lost.” ~J.R.R. Tolkien

Sometimes as humans we lose sight of our profound inner resourcefulness—the wellspring of creativity and strength that has kept humanity reinventing itself over and over again.

It happens to everyone. We get lost in comfortable routines, become discouraged from trying new things, and forget how to play.

When life feels disappointingly status quo, it’s easy to keep floating downcurrent as you tell yourself, “Welp, I guess this is as good as it gets.”

I don’t know about you, but I’ve definitely caught myself in a trap of wondering if the best is …

Web of Lies: Breaking Free from Manipulative Behavior

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“The truth will set you free, but first it will make you miserable.” ~James A. Garfield

When the email finally came, it felt like a trap snapping shut. Its words were carefully spun—half-truths and veiled accusations twisted together to shift blame and obscure the real issue.

For years, I had brushed off these moments as quirks or misunderstandings. But now, the patterns were clear. I was entangled in something far more calculated. Recognizing the manipulation for what it was marked the first step toward cutting myself free, though it was anything but easy.

Understanding Manipulative Behavior

Manipulation often hides in …

Healing Through Reparenting: The Greatest Act of Self-Love

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“When you reparent yourself, you can step in and give your inner child the deep love and attention you may not have had when you were young.” ~Victoria Albina

Reparenting is not for the faint of heart, but the journey can surely be described as the greatest act of self-love. It’s a gift—a chance to redo some of the painful aspects of childhood and adolescence, but with the awareness of an adult mind. It is also an opportunity to connect much more deeply with ourselves and those we wish to connect with in a more authentic way.

What is reparenting?…

How to Work Mindfully with Pain and Illness

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“Can I sit with suffering, both yours and mine, without trying to make it go away? Can I stay present to the ache of loss or disgrace—disappointment in all its many forms—and let it open me? This is the trick.” ~Pema Chödrön

At forty-seven years of age, I have experienced chronic illness in some form since my mid-to-late twenties. This past year, I’ve also encountered chronic pain on a level I have never experienced before. Part of that is illness-related, and part of it is simply my body getting older, coupled with the effects of repetitive motions from sitting and …

What Happened When I Stopped Blaming and Embraced Radical Responsibility

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“I can respect any person who can put their ego aside and say, ‘I made a mistake, I apologize, and I’m correcting the behavior.’” ~Sylvester McNutt

I remember I was a teenager when I went through this horrible breakup. I had never experienced heartbreak before, and the pain was excruciating, impacting many areas of my life. For years, I blamed him for the end of our relationship and for not appreciating my love.

My friends told me it was his loss and that I deserved much better. I nursed that breakup for longer than necessary. I never took responsibility for …

Two Reasons We Sabotage Our Joy and Success and How to Stop

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“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” ~Rumi

Have you ever held yourself back from going after what you truly want, or from enjoying what you have, because of a lingering fear that it might be taken away from you, or because you felt guilty for having more than others?

For years, I found myself unintentionally sabotaging moments of pure joy and personal success without being able to embrace them fully.

For example, when my son was born, a rush of panic would flood me every time I even imagined the possibility of losing him, and I …