Posts tagged with “control”
How to Trust That You’ll Be Okay No Matter What
“The only thing that makes life possible is permanent, intolerable uncertainty; not knowing what comes next.” ~Ursula K. Le Guin
Did you play with cootie catchers as a kid?
You picked a number and watched anxiously as your friend counted it out. Open. Close. Open. Close.
You chose a color or picture or word and waited in anticipation as your friend unfolded the flap and read your destiny.
Or how about that MASH game? Mansion, apartment, shack, house?
I played these games with an insatiable desire for all the details.
How is all of this going to play out?
Where …
How to Take Back Control from the Negative Script in Your Head
“You don’t have to control your thoughts. You just have to stop letting them control you.” ~Dan Millman
I’d love to say I had an “Eat, Pray, Love” moment where sitting sobbing in the bathroom I received divine guidance to leave my husband and go traveling the world eating amazing food. But sadly, it wasn’t quite that profound.
It was more a long series of nights sobbing in the bathroom, looking at myself in the mirror, and concluding “You’re broken.”
I wasn’t depressed and hadn’t been for a long time. My anxiety, a lifelong companion, was under control. …
How I Learned to Stop Pushing So Hard and Enjoy the Moment
“Life is a balance between what we can control and what we cannot. I am learning to live between effort and surrender.” ~Danielle Orner
Over a year ago, I boarded a plane and found myself on the beautiful beaches of southeast Asia. My dream was to travel the world, indefinitely, while working independently and living out of a suitcase. I had worked hard in my life to come to this place, and there couldn’t have been a moment that was more positive for me.
However, as I enjoyed sunbathing on the beautiful beaches, I started to feel weary. It’s hard …
How to Feel More in Control When Life Gets Overwhelming
“When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don’t adjust the goals, adjust the action steps.” ~Confucius
I’m in the middle of a career transition and it hasn’t been easy. For the first few months after quitting my job—a job which I thought should have been perfect, where I thought I would stay for years—I was paralyzed into inaction regarding anything career-related. I had lost confidence in my own judgment; after all, I had thought that job would be the one and it wasn’t, so did I even really know what I wanted?
This kind of self-doubt makes …
How to Be Less Anxious About Things You Can’t Change
“One of the happiest moments is when you find the courage to let go of what you can’t change.” ~Unknown
Over the last few years, I’ve had to deal with a frustrating problem.
It’s something that’s not uncommon, but it can be debilitating, and it has affected me every day. Some days have been incredibly tough, and they’ve tested my tolerance and my patience.
The problem is chronic back pain.
Every day I get up, knowing that throughout the day I’m going to have a discomfort that could oscillate between a mild annoyance and an intense burning. At some point, …
10 Ways to Let Go of the Hustle and Surrender to the Flow
“You can’t control everything. Sometimes you just need to relax and have faith that things will work out. Let go a little and just let life happen.” ~Kody Keplinger
I have always been an overachiever: straight As, the top of my class; whatever I endeavored, I aimed to be the best at it. I strived through high school, college, graduate school, and in the corporate world.
My hard work came with awards, accolades, and the feeling of accomplishment. But it also came with burnout, exhaustion, and the feeling of never being good enough.
Once I achieved a goal, I …
Overcoming a Negative Body Image: 4 Things to Remember
TRIGGER WARNING: This post deals with an account of anorexia and may be triggering to some people.
“You will never be free until you free yourself from the prison of your own false thoughts.” ~Philip Arnold
I really don’t remember my life before anorexia. I think back to my early teenage years when I ate peanut butter sandwiches and drank hot chocolate without a single thought of how many calories I had consumed. There was no guilt, no worry, no need for perfection. How I wish I could get those carefree moments back.
A few years ago anorexia completely …
How Expectations Can Drive People Away and How to Let Go of Control
“I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.” ~Friedrich Salomon Perls
About five years ago, I had a falling out with a close friend. I was irritated because she didn’t do the things I thought she should and she didn’t give as much as I did. I felt I had been very generous with her, and I expected her to do the same. I felt she owed me.
My anger became unmanageable and started seeping into pretty much every interaction we had. She began cancelling dinner …
Why Letting Go of Your Tight Grip Actually Gives You More Control
“Anything you can’t control in life is teaching you how to let go.” ~Unknown
I was growing impatient. I wanted an answer about something and it just wasn’t coming, no matter how hard I tried to prod it into happening. I was growing frustrated. And I was growing frustrated with my frustrations about it.
So I decided to take a walk. The act of breathing in fresh air and hearing birdsong is centering for me. Just putting one foot in front of the other in rapid succession for an hour or two always helps to clear my head. I receive …
7 Common Fears That Don’t Have to Control Us
“Love is what we were born with. Fear is what we learned here.” ~Marianne Williamson
As babies, we know nothing about the world. In the universe of an infant, there are no norms to follow, no rigid rules and regulations; no room for labeling or judging ourselves and others. We don’t yet know to disapprove of ourselves, and we’re curious to play, learn, and grow.
We are all born free spirits. Then our environment—our families, schools, religions, and political systems—shape the way we think and behave.
Fear is a learned practice. Children generally are not afraid of trying, failing, …
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