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Posts tagged with “introvert”

The Breakthrough That Helped Me Stop Comparing Myself to Others

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“Comparison is the thief of joy.” ~Theodore Roosevelt

In March 2020, the UK went into its first Covid lockdown, and the country was swept with anxiety and sadness. When would we see our loved ones again? Would our health be okay? Was my job safe? And more pressingly, how the heck was I expected to teach my kids?

Along with everyone else, I first received the news with a sense of impending doom and tried to make the best of a bizarre situation. “Normal life” consisted of stressful home schooling, online working, mask wearing, and (in the UK at least) …

Why You Don’t Need Many Friends to Be Happy

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“Introversion—along with its cousins sensitivity, seriousness, and shyness—is now a second-class personality trait, somewhere between a disappointment and a pathology.” ~Susan Cain, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking

I’ll be honest, I don’t have many friends.

And it’s something I’ve always felt a level of shame about.

In fact, I recognize it’s a self-limiting belief I’ve been carrying around since secondary school: I don’t make friends easily or have a big circle; therefore, I’m unworthy or there’s something wrong with me.

That’s not to say I’ve never had friends. I’ve had friends from childhood …

Retreats for Highly Sensitive People and Introverts

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Have you ever wondered what it would be like to go on a retreat to some magical location where you could deeply connect with yourself and forge lifelong relationships with likeminded people? Then did you immediately wonder if it might feel a little overwhelming to you as an introvert or highly sensitive person?

As an HSP introvert who loves travel and new experiences, I have long had my eye on Melissa Renzi’s retreats, which are specifically designed for people like me—and I’m guessing a lot of you.

In addition to being a Tiny Buddha contributor and this month’s site sponsor, …

4 Happiness Tips from an Introvert Who Spent Years Trying to Change

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“Get comfortable being uncomfortable.” ~Jillian Michaels

I’m an introvert. I need lots of time to myself to recharge after socializing with others, and I relish solitude, as it gives me the time and space to think and be creative. I’m quiet and can be shy on occasion, but I really enjoy spending time with close family and friends.

Throughout my life, I’ve struggled with this part of my personality and focused a lot of energy trying to change it. However, the acceptance I have found over the last year has been life-changing, and I hope writing about my journey …

How I Reclaimed My Introversion as a Superpower Instead of Feeling Inadequate

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“We are each gifted in a unique and important way. It is our privilege and our adventure to discover our own special light.” ~Mary Dunbar

“I don’t want to sit by Teresa. She doesn’t talk.”

Ouch.

I was ten years old and at a fundraising dinner for my travel softball team.

It was that dreaded moment after I had gotten my plate of chicken, mashed potatoes, and green beans, and had to choose a seat at a big table.

I sat down next to my teammate who I looked up to. She was two years older than me. She was …

A Simple Guide for Introverts: How to Embrace Your Personality

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“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

The world has a preference for the extroverted among us. In school we learn public speaking, and we are expected to raise our hand and participate in discussions. We act as if what we hear and see from a person can tell us everything there is to know about them. But what about the unspoken, that magical light that lives within us?

Here’s what I’ve learned about being an introvert that has helped me embrace, value, and honor …

Confessions of an Extrovert: Why I Now Love My Alone Time

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“Allow yourself to grow and change. Your future self is waiting.” -Unknown

Not to be dramatic, but I really mean it when I say that solitude changed my life. I am an extrovert who loves humans, socializing, and learning from people and experiences. I’ve always enjoyed being around others, and don’t get me wrong, I still thrive this way. But when I got Covid in 2021, life completely changed, and it’s not the only way I thrive now.

Before Covid, I’d been living my life in a way that wasn’t serving me. I was partying a lot, not eating …

Why We’re Afraid of Real Connection and Why We Need Deeper Conversations Now

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“It’s one of the great paradoxes of the human condition—we ask some variation of the question ‘How are you feeling?’ over and over, which would lead one to assume that we attach some importance to it.  And yet we never expect or desire—or provide—an honest answer.” ~Mark Brackett, Ph.D., Permission to Feel

I used to feel so satisfied if I had made them cry.

Not in a twisted, sadistic way.

I just knew once things went quiet and they felt safe, we could peel back enough layers, the tears would flow, and we could finally get to the truth. The …

When You Struggle with Being Yourself, Remember This

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“Make the most of yourself… for that is all there is of you.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Every day, it was more or less the same. I presented an edited version of myself to the world. I felt a deep level of discomfort with the idea of letting myself go. Could I? Should I? The answer was “no” every time, even if it wasn’t always a conscious decision.

It felt wrong to be myself in a society where we’re conditioned to believe that we have to look and be a certain way to fit in. I believed that no one …

A Love Note to Introverts: 10 Superpowers That Make You Amazing

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“Your vision will become clear only when you look into your own heart. Who looks outside dreams, who looks inside, awakens.” ~Carl Jung

Dear Introvert,

We live in an extraverted world, one that is not always kind to introverts. You may be that introvert who was bullied because you were quiet, or who felt as though you never fit in. Maybe you used food, alcohol, or substances to numb the pain, which created its own set of problems.

First and foremost, know that you are perfect as you are.

Being introverted doesn’t make you weird, awkward, anti-social, or too sensitive. …

The Introvert Empath

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I’m Not Mad, Depressed, or Antisocial

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25 Things Introverts Want You to Understand About Them

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“Solitude matters, and for some people, it’s the air they breathe.” ~Susan Cain

We live in a culture that celebrates extroversion and sees introversion as a weakness or something to overcome.

If you’re an introvert, you may have grown up believing there was something wrong with you. You may not even have realized there’s a word for your personality type, that 26 to 50% of the population falls under that umbrella, and that our brains are actually wired differently than extroverts’ brains.

According to Scott Barry Kaufman, the Scientific Director of the Imagination Institute (which sounds like the coolest …

Yes, I’m an Introvert

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How I Stopped Feeling Guilty About Doing What’s Best for Me

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“A good rule of thumb is that any environment that consistently leaves you feeling bad about who you are is the wrong environment.” ~Laurie Helgoe

Do you ever worry that if you fulfill your needs you will disappoint others? Do you ever feel guilty for doing what’s best for you?

For years, I felt guilty about taking time for myself. I thought that being alone, away from the rest of the world, meant being selfish. This was especially true in one toxic relationship that kept dragging me down because I was afraid to make a change. As a peaceful, …

Why Introverts Feel Drained in Groups and How I Preserve My Energy

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“In the midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you.” ~Deepak Chopra

When I was younger, I was always referred to as “the quiet one.” I didn’t mind it; I knew I was much quieter than most people I met. Not speaking and spending time on my own was natural for me.

Friends and workmates recognized this but would still often ask me if I wanted to join them when they were going out, even though they knew I would usually say no. They understood me as quiet, but they didn’t really understand just how much I disliked …

The Introvert’s Hate/Hate Relationship With Spontaneity

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“The man who is prepared has his battle half fought.” ~Miguel De Cervantes

They say you should live in the present, and “they” form a chorus of voices that is growing in number by the second. Everywhere you turn these days, the message is loud and clear: life is better when you live in the moment.

I get it; I really do. I know that when I hit that flow state, regardless of what I’m immersed in, time passes in a heartbeat and I tend to really enjoy myself.

It’s just that I would prefer it if I could …

9 Confidence Myths That Only Quiet People Will Truly Understand

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“Quiet is the new loud.” ~Patrick Stump

 Isn’t it ironic?

When you need it the most, your confidence is nowhere to be found.

When you’re freaking out at the thought of meeting new people, speaking up or going for that job interview, you’re only ally has gone AWOL.

And even though you’ve tried all the standard advice on how to be more confident, more self-assured, if you’re anything like I used to be, it’s left you even more anxious. Even less sure of yourself.

And all your efforts to be more confident have got you worrying that there’s actually …

How Introverts Can Meet People Without Bars or Booze

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“Be yourself, because an original is worth more than a copy.” ~Unknown

There was a moment during my twenties years when I realized I was an introvert.

Now, this may sound like a mundane realization to you, but trust me, this was the Big Epiphany of my young life.

I spent my teenage years pretending to be someone else. Like a lot of my friends, I went out as much as possible. I partied. I was loud.

Until it dawned on me: I hated going out. I hated parties. I wasn’t loud. Honestly? I just wanted to stay home, drink …

The Introvert’s Brain: Why They Might “Think Too Much”

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“Only those who care about you can hear when you are quiet.” ~Unknown

I find it difficult to be understood. I seem to frequently create complexity out of something that is perhaps very simple and straightforward to others.

For example, going to a movie. For many people, it would be “choose a movie, choose a time, choose a cinema” and there you go.

For me, I check movie reviews, all possible timings, in all possible cinemas. For each timing and location, I will consider if the timing allows other things to be done before and after the movie, and whether …