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Rhaenys

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  • Rhaenys
    Participant

    Sorry guys, I haven’t been posting because my last post (that I wrote Friday maybe or even day before) was waiting for moderation and it is just now posted. This is not the First time. So I felt somewhat stupid to post again, before my last post was moderated, also I had a busy weekend.


    @Sammy

    About your question, I’m not sure why did your boyfriend ask not to get gifts? Because if he doesn’t want people to spend money these days on his birthday, maybe you could make him something, or buy something that ‘s not expensive but meaningful. Or you could plan a nice trip somewhere in natura for you two and make some food?

    Also, even though you’re been replying to Jay, I read your posts and they help me a lot too.

    I’m busy now, but I’m going to try to post later today. I wish everyone nice week.

    Rhaenys
    Participant

    @Jay2023  I read your posts, and it seems to me I feel really similar on some points. I also don’t remember when was the last times I completley got over someone unless I meet someone else that got me interested.
    Even before relationships, I had crushes, until I met my nex crus. I’m not sure if this is normal? However there are people who feel like this, we are not the only ones.

    Actually, now, being single 10 monts, which is the most since I’ve been 23, I’m starting to get over my ex. Not completley, though. And I am chatting with someone else, so maybe that’s contributing. However, if I saw a pic of my ex with someone else, it would affect me, I know that.

    I guess there are people who always think that they can find someone better in relationships, and people like me, who are afraid they won’t find anyone better.. until they do. And I had low self confidence through my 20s. I don’t anymore, but now I project another problem – I know I am handsome enough and smart, and there are definitely guys who would like me, but I feel like there’s noboy here. And there was not many people I’ve meet in those last months. It’s like I always find a problem in my mind. First, I thought I was not handsome enough, now there are no guys my age who I like that are single.

    Also, I understand when you say ” I just feel like nothing is moving along for me at the moment and I know I have to be patient as these things take time”. I have that feeling still. I was sad for months, I cried almost every day. I don’t know. But I don’t have that “joie de vivre”. I’m kind of bored. Yes, I have friends and nice time with them, but them weekends or vacarions come, and friends go on trips with their partners, and I’m sitting at home. So iI tell my friends I have to be patient and better times will come. Summer is coming and I love summer, but I don’t know who will I even be able to go to beach with. I’m not mad mat my friends, not at all, I think they have right to do what makes them happy, and I would do similar probably, in their position. At least maybe before I experienced this myself, bein last one single during the pandemic. Now, I think I know it’s so hard, so if one of my friends broke up, I would go out with her sometims probably, because now I know how hard it is.

    I know people will tell me I shoudl be happy whether in relationship or not.. But I guess my biggest fear is being alone. And I’ve been already alone a lot, even in my previous relationships. Yes, we are all going to get alone eventually, when we get old, even if we have families. But I don’t want to spend big part of my life alone. The thought of going to work and coming in a empty home in my 40s scares me.

    Rhaenys
    Participant

    @Jay2023 Thank you for your kind worlds.
    You are too harsh on yourself. I slipped myself a lot of times after my breakups.

    I think after a breakup it takes some time.. You read for example Sammy’s and Danny’s posts, telling you how she wasn’t good enough for you, how she didn’t support you and wasn’t right for you. And you know they are right, you believe them, you want to believe them, but you just don’t feel it as such yourself. You still miss that person.. Sadly it takes time.

    I guess the process can go slower or faster, and I don’t think I’m the best person in doing it faster.. I’ve done many things that made it slower, I guess. But at the end you realize all they were saying by yourself, when the infatuation stops. And then you will know all that they were saying to you by yourself.

    You are doing all the right steps, hanging with your friends, taking care of you, going to therapy.. Don’t be so upset because of the slip. You can also try light contact with someone else, to see if that helps you.

    Rhaenys
    Participant

    Dear @Sammy, no need to apologize. You did not get it wrong at all, that was the reason I use tinder, but I guess I don’t call it dating myself until I meet this person directly, not just online. We did talk about that, and I guess we will probably meet eventually, so we’ll see how it goes. I just don’t want to have much hopes or projections, since we haven’t really meet.

    Thank you for sharing your experience how to let go. I guess I’ve read all this, here and on other places. I kind od think this is how I should feel but I don’t, not yet. I guess I can’t let it go yet. I hope I will be there yet.

    Actually, my ex just called me today, and as his family has some problems, he asked me on advice, since it has to do with my profession and I could help. So I told him everything I could to help. We heard a few times after our breakup. There was snow here recently and traffic jams so he asked if I am ok… He is not a bad person, we are just at different stages in our life and he is too young, and I want some other things.

    I also agree with Danny you could let your bf help you, I think he would be glad to do it.


    @Dannydan
    , hahaha, yes it does seem like I was hitting a bit. I just thought he is a good catch and I wanted him to know that. I wanted him to know there are girls similar age who want connection, partnership and family, the things he mentioned he wants. I guess when I know that there are guys who want that, it makes me feel better, so I wanted to make him feel better too. 🙂
    I hope everything will go well with the wedding plans, fingers crossed.

    @

    Rhaenys
    Participant

    Thank you @Sammy for your kind words and encouragement.

    I am really surprised you mentioned dating because it doesn’t seem like that to me.  I have not meet him, we are just chatting (messages only), no videos or calls, so I’m not sure if I would find him attractive in a romantic way if I met him, it there would be chemistry. Yes, I’ve seen pictures, but pictures and messages alone can be tricky. Also, I live in one town, and work in another, and he is even further, in totally different direction so I’m not sure if that would work really. I used to be ready to move because of love, but my boyfriends so far have not deserved that and I’m careful.

    So I’m not sure if anything will come out of it, or I want that because of distance and I also told him that. I guess we’ll see.

    I still have some bad days and some days these fears if you will ever have a husband or family do come back. Especially because of this weird times in pandemic, and the uncertainity of whether and when will it end. Sometimes I do get lonely, espcially when weekends come, and for example my friends are mostly coupled and they go on romantic trips or they plan summer vacations with their partners, and life gives so few chances to meet anyone these days.

    But most of the time I do feel better. I hope I will feel even better in future and I try to be optimistic. I hope I will manage to post here more.

    I wanted to ask you Sammy, how did you manage to overcame the fear of something new? I remember reading this topic, and how you wrote that you are afraid, and you would just want to wake up with married with someone, lying near you, and with kids. How did you overcome that? I’m afraid too, afraid I can’t make a wrong choice this time, because the time is passing…

     

    • This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by Rhaenys.
    Rhaenys
    Participant

    Hello guys

    I’ve been missing, but I was reading you all the time.

    I admit I left, because I actually felt ashamed. NBC just started posting then and I felt like I couldn’t read her posts and help her, I was feeling too bad myself, so I thought better post nothing.


    @Sammy
    , I really admire you, you were here when you needed help, but you are now such a great support to others. I an very glad for you and your new boyfriend. 😀 And @Dannydan also helped other a lot with his advices.


    @Jay
    , I read you story and I do understand you, as it happened to me too. I also felt rejection and heartbreak. But it does get better. Sadly, it takes time. It is now been 8 and half months since my break up. I am no longer depressed and sad all the time. I actually was, maybe.. until month ago, month and a half. I’m not perfect also. You mentioned you are 35 I think and want to have a woman, family and kids. I understand that too, I’m 33 and I want that too. Actually, a guy like you in your years and single without kids would be really interesting to me.  It will be better with time, I promise. I can’t say I’m  perfect now and happily satisfied all the time, since I still want a partner and family. But it’s not so hard as it was at the beginning.

    These days… well I don’t cry very often, I’m not kind of depressed. Easter was a bit hard, I admit. It’s also a bit bland, with the epidemic, I admit. Sometimes I feel all the days are the same. And I know everyone stays at home too, but I also want someone to watch tv and cuddle with. And with all this epidemic, there are almost no chances to meet anyone new, and it’s hard and depressing. For both me and my other single friends, although there are few. That’s another problem, because coupled ones are not interested in going places where you can meet someone, they are mostly indifferend to that, and I understand that. But boy it is a bit hard to be one ot the last single ones in a big epidemic. I know I shouldn’t rush, but such circumstances are not easy.

    And I know people will say I sohuldn’t compare,  but that’s not it. I don’t want to be coupled because my friends are, I want that because that is my wish, it’s what I always wanted.

    I  meet with my friends often and I enjoy their company. I don’t think about my ex that often anymore. I have some really nice days. I started running and I also bought my first new car, it really was time for it. So actually I do feel much better.

    I’ve been going to piano lessons with my friends, and loving that. Also, I tried Tinder a bit. Most of my single friends did, and I also found many aquaintances, so I guess this is really popular these days. And after a few matches, I found an interesting guy that I can talk with. However, at first I was unsure and now the pandemic is rising again, so we haven’t met, but it’s nice to find someome like that. It’s like we keep each other company during these times. Still, he is from a bit further town, and we can not be even sure if we would like each other when we meet, so I don’t have hopes at this time, but it’s a little bit interesting.

    • This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by Rhaenys.
    Rhaenys
    Participant

    @NBC

    Welcome here. I have to get to work now but I’ll get back to you later if you wish.

    Just to answer.. “And how do you tag somebody on Tiny Buddha?”

    You just write: @ and then his forum name. For example: @NBC

    And then the user gets e-mail about being tagged.

    Rhaenys
    Participant

    @Sammy

    I’ll reply to somethings you wrote…

    ” I do wonder if I feel the need to cling to the love of his family because it vicariously or indirectly allows me to feel loved by him as he is their son.” – yes, that may be the case.

    Holidays are hard. I felt that too. Did you spend them with your family and friends? I did, and they were still really hard.

    I’ve never had boyfriends introduce me that much into their family. I missed my ex during holidays a lot. And I don’t understand that bonding and feeling of missing his family, but it may be just because of the reason you wrote.

    “He did have an awakening of sorts after I contacted him for closure but in the end I knew based on the many years together it was empty promises and too late…. Maybe deep down I’m still holding onto something and hence by taking bold actions I feel it will speed up the process of fully healing rather than dealing with what I’m actually feeling?… I want to fully heal, that will allow me then to give my all to someone new.”

    It seemed to me that you actually maybe had a chance to reconnect with your ex after your talk, and you realized it was empty promises, so you move forward. That is something that was always really hard to me, so I know how hard it is. And the way you don’t rush into something you. I admire that.

    I know it’s hard, but you seem to really want to make progress, forget him and move on.. That takes a lot of ocurage. and giving yourself time…

    However… “It’s what led me to overindulging in alcohol using it as a crutch and that spiral…I’m not too sure if that’s what may be happening again if I’m being honest, food for thought.”

    These worried me.. Are you ok? Does living with your family help?

     

    Me… I have ups and downs. Panic attacks stopped, I’m sleeping well, I have apetite, I don’t have anxiety attacs. But I feel hopeless. I think anxiety is here all the time, just not on surface. And a bit of depression.. maybe a good word would be deep sadness.

    Holidays were so hard. I live with my family and I have friends, but I guess that’s not the live I wanted for my 30s and I don’t know if it will ever change. Living alone seems even worse.

    Sometimes I ask myself what it’s all worth for.. Going to work, earning money, for what? With pandemic, being home all og the time, most of my friends in relationships going forward, so not really thinking anything will change even with pandemic stops, I’m a bit of hopeless. I know everything can change in a day, but my past experiences are bad, so…

    My mom is a big support, and she says she has a feeling everything will go better for me this year, and she has a gut, instinct for this things, so that actually gives me hope (maybe it’s funny.. but it helps).

    I had some hard times (sometines feeling lonely, also some fights and problems at home in my family – not me directly invovlved), so I contacted him and he also me a few times… I know it’s not maybe smart but I couldn’t help it. I still do miss him. I also know I want family in future, so it would be better for me to find someone who wants that too, as my ex is too young (me 33, him 25) and doesn’t want it yet.

    So we were just talking about our lives, what we do… I think we still do care about each other a lot. I try not to except anthing from that, although I admit I kind of have a wish for him to choose me (like Danny did with B), but I also see it’s not realistic. So, I guess I’m not very proud of contact (I haven’t told anybody) but couldn’t help it either.

    I have some good times with friends, but then I feel down when I come home again… I also play piano a lot, it’s something I started after break-up and at first used it as something that allows me to think and past time, but I think I also like it. I still feel like I need something outside to change, and every day is really similar, and not really inspiring.

    So I admire Sammy when you say you want to heal.. I feel like I’m still in a way missing my ex, and I don’t know how can that past excpet is someone new comes.. I tend to stay in love in a guy until I meet another. I don’t know if’ that’s just me and my problem, and how to change that.

     

    Rhaenys
    Participant

    @Danny

    Congratulations! WOw! That such news.. although I expected that when you said you will propose. But still. COngrats!

    B sounds like such a great keeper, but the way you care and think abouth her now, you are too, now. And you give great advices.

    I would really like to meet someone who think about me the way you do about B. (And me about him, of course. :D)

     


    @Kkasxo

    I’m really sorry about your situation, it sounds really bad… Really seems like you-don’t-know-whether-to-cry-or-laugh situation.

    Although you do seem to bit handling it well.

     

    Rhaenys
    Participant

    Happy new year to everyone.


    @Danny
    I really hope proposal went good. Hoping to hear good news from you and thank you for your kind words.


    @Shelbyville
    your story on this topic gave me hope. I really do feel like you did about some things, I understand what you wrote, as many of those things I feel too.  I Know you feel really stressful now, but the change both you and your life went in these 2 years is amazing. I realise you said you won’t post, but I just wanted to say I wish you the best.


    @Tim
    gave me a great encouragement and I’ll be always thankful for that.


    @Sammy
    and @Kkasxo, you both made a lot of progress and I admire you for that.

    I stopped posting because, similar as Sammy said, I didn’t want to be reliant on someone’s support and I admit I also feel excluded sometimes a bit… But I was visiting this forums, and reading this and other topics too, And even though everyone can open their topic and get advice, it seemed good to me that there is a topic when people with a bit of similar problems can give support to each other. So I was a bit sad seeing this topic fall down.

    If anyone here feels they are still on a journey, and if @Shelbyville doesn’t mind, I would like to hear from you and continue mutual support in this topic.

    in reply to: Am I too old? #371182
    Rhaenys
    Participant

    Dear WestCoastGal,

    the name of your topic caught my attention, because this question bothers me too. I’m 33 and had a break up recently, so I’m asking myself same questions, as I’m single now and I don’t even have a patrner.

    However, there is a biological limit, but many women can have children up maybe 40 years. So I said to myself, I still have 7 years left. Some younger women have problems with having children, but then, some older women have them without problems. I Know a neighbour who had a child at 42, and a wife of a college had their first and so far only baby at 40 (they married when she was 39). So it may be that you have time.

    But, I also looked a bit at your other topics, and maybe you should ask yourself if there are some other things that actually bother you more.

    You were mentioning the way your boyfriend shows you love, how he answers your messages, wanting to have vulnerable and  deep conversations with him, wanting him to open emotionally, saying he loves you… It seems to me that maybe he’s not assuring you the way you need to be assured. Are you really sure it is you who wants to wait, or are you afraid of asking him?  Are you sure you’re not the one who wants children sooner, and he doesn’t, or you’re not sure if  he will? And I understand all of this completley, as I had problems with my boyfriends who weren’t ready to commit or even live tohegher, not mentioning having children.

    Sadly, we women have a biological clock, and after that passes we can’t have children. Men may allow them to think they can always find youger woman (even though they can be wrong and unsucesful in that, but they don’t have the same limit).

    Also, I remembered reading this article at Ask Polly, which may be helpful: https://www.thecut.com/2019/09/ask-polly-i-want-kids-but-my-boyfriend-isnt-ready.html

     

    Rhaenys
    Participant

    @Tim I’ve been reading this topic and I have to congratulate you, as you and your girlfriend are expecting! Wow that is such great news. I really wish you all the best and hapiness.  Your advices have been much helpful and you have helped me feel better, thank you.


    @Danny
    Congrats! I really hope you will make B happy this time, and you will be happy to.


    @Shelbyville
      I read history of this topic, not much, but some. And I think in some aspects I understand your story, I recognize myself in some parts. So your news of being happy with your boyfriend really gives me hope.


    @Kkasxo

    Like I said to Shelby, I read some history of this topic not all… But I remember your posts about how you are ready to think about family and children, and you live with Mr A and he’s not ready…
    I had a (previous, not the last) ex boyfriend for 7 years and he was never sure or ready for anyting. And when we broke up I was 30… I regret that the most. I think now I should break up at least 3 or 4 years earlier. I also recognize that at that time I was in a bigger city and I felt alone so I coulnd’t. And the break up happened when I returned home so that was the best time for me to handle it… But on the other side now I wonder how many chances I had and I blew up in that city because of waiting for him.
    I think if you really ask yourself, if you are sure of this or not, you know the answer. I knew it to, always.. But blocked it because of my fear of being alone, of staying alone.. So you know it, but not from this position of fear. You are still young I think, in your twenties..
    In thirties you feel that you have even less time and more coupled friends. So, you know how you feel. And if you’re not happy, don’t lose time like me.

     

    I think I’m mostly over my breakup and ex.. Well not in a way that I don’t feel anything, but I recognize what I want – a serious relationship and a family. And he is too young and immature to give me that. And I want that more than him… I guess break up was just inevitable and it better happened sooner than later. But anxiety creeps up about not finding that what I want. And I don’t even think there is a problem with me, I’m just afraid because of pandemic and everything, like my coupled friends, there won’t be a chance to meet new people. Like, how could it happen?

    @Shelbyville
    How did you met your boyfriend, you mentioned dating apps? I think I’m just not ready for them, and I won’t ever me.

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by Rhaenys.
    Rhaenys
    Participant

    @Danny,

    I’ve read your story and by reading it I also felt like I experienced B’s side myself. Not exactly in that way necessary… It’s strange how I always felt I was rejected because I was not interesting enough, or good enough, or because I was to serious… But you gave me a real proof of another perspective (that people who care to me were saying to me, but I couldn’t believe it 100 percent) – that maybe those guys felt I’m too good for them. I doesn’t have to be that way, and I guess I doesn’t even matter anymore. But thank you for that.
    As for you, I agree that you did her wrong… But if you realized that, and you regret and you wan’t to change and do different in the future that’s a good turn, and it would be really good of you to do that. So you can be with some women in the future, and your relationship could be a good one.
    As for B.. Yes you do owe her an apology, even an explanation.. I guess I would like to hear that myself (never did, though)… But ask her to be again with her… I’m not sure of that. I also think you are just starting your change, you miss her because you realized how great she is, but is it really best for her to be together with you? I’m not sure.


    @Sammy

    I read your story about meeting your ex and now your dilemma what to do… To tell you the truth, recently I avoided giving advices because I feel I was too hurt and not in a good place to give advice. Like, as I’m hurt and single, I would give wrong advice, tell someone to break up with boyfriend because of a problem, even if that is not always the best… Because I don’t have one.

    And to tell the truth, I was reading your story, and thinking “and why no ex never wanted to get back to me…”  And then I caught myself, you stupid, he did.. My first boyfriend broke up 2 times and we got back 2 times. And now? I wish he did not. I was too much a fool to get back. I even initiated it. What a fool. So I lost 7 years with him, instead of 2. Really great.
    Our mind really plays tricks with us.. I still have to work on myself, as I first thought I’m so awful that no one wanted me back , but he did. The second and third didn’t. And that’s okay. Because I would got back to them and made the same mistake. So I guess universe is taking care of me, even if I  can’t. I really wish my 1st boyfriend never wanted me back, and I’m glad the second one didn’t. The third, recent one? I’m still strugling a bit, but I’m feeling I’ll be really happy he didn’t, very soon. Because the first month and second I would get back.
    But this third month I realized that if I want real love and commitment I have to find a guy who wants that too.

    What should you do? I still don’t feel I can’t give you advice whether to be back with him or not… So I guess I can just tell you my story, which I just did.

    About the birthday, I guess you can send a message and left it at that.


    @Shelbyville

    I’m happy for your relationship and for work. You give me hope that everything can turn better, and thank you very much for that.

    @Kkasxho

    I read some of your posts in this thread, and glad to hear from you. I’m happy for news about your mama and kitten.

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 5 months ago by Rhaenys.
    Rhaenys
    Participant

    Hello, I wanted to do an update…

    I’ve been visiting both this site and forums, and reading articles and topics.

    I think I made some progress this month.. My appetite is pretty normal. I’m having a really good sleep. I do wake up sometimes in the middle of the night, but I just fall asleep again, without any panicking feeling. I also wake up feeling better in morning.
    Although I guess I would try to escape that if the situation is different, the COVID-19 and a sickness last week made me to do what you Anita told me – they made me to stay home, not to go out at weekends and because of cold I was home 5 days last week all the time. And I made it. Yaaay. 🙂 And it’ wasnt’s so bad.  Actually, I managed to have some sleep I needed so much (as the break up was just in the beginning of my vacation, I didn’t get any much needed sleep during vacation as I barely slept then). I read books and played piano and it was actually really nice. I finally got some rest.

    I also did some reflection… I guess the realization that the whole time I seemed to want a serious relationship and commitment, but without making sure to choose guys that wanted that too hit me.. And by doing that, by desperately wanting a relationship and not choosing wise, I didn’t let myself to have the thing I really wanted. I think that now I really get it.

    Also… I realized that I may not have acted mature either, and that maybe I was (or am) afraid of commitment.. As I always avoided things like doing housework for example. So I tried to be more aware of that now.

    I went to therapy but I’m not sure if and how it helped.. I am better now, but therapist was mostly really generic, and talked to me for example that I should do things that I like to fulfill my energy, that I should live in the moment, that partnership works better ih people are similar… But I felt it was too generic.

    I reflected myself… I am aware that my parents marriage didn’t work. And that I wanted an escape and saw it in romantic relationship. But at the same time, because of their marriage I somehow didn’t believe in it, like that it can’t work and it won’t happen to me ( I guess because their didn’t work). I remember hating romantic novels – I told myself the reason is they are silly and boring, but it was because I thought love can’t or won’t happen to me.

    I also have some issues with my dad… I feel like he puts me down. We talk, and he says he loves me and cares for me and that I am worthy of love and better than my exes…. And the next minute he tells me that I have to think what I did wrong in my relationships and not do it again an the future and that guys are always into me in the beginning and then they change.. It’s like he wants to hurt me.  I don’t really call him these days. I just can’t. Last week I faced him with that, and told him that his words hurt him. I guess I wanted a reaction like, oh I  wasn’t aware, I’m really sorry (I would say that if my words hurt someone I care, or if he misinterpreted them). But I didn’t get that, he was just defending himself, told me that he also thinks about what he has done wrong so he can be better in future and that he won’t speak it if it bothers me – but impyling he is going to think it. And that’s not good enough for me. I was angry at first, but right now I don’t even feel anger, I just don’t and can’t talk to him because it makes me worse. I think he blames me because I don’t want to have contact with his wife and her family, like he wanted me to. And I guess I have to accept I will never have a relationship with my dad the way I would like it.

    I do plan to talk to him in the future, but I guess now I’m still a bit hurt and he opens this wounds.

    And I realize this is connected, that because of my relationship with dad after divorce that was not as I wanted it, I wanted an escape, in romantic love… And that wanting, that was too strong, actually made me just further from it.

    I also thought about your advice about moving far away from my parents… At first I hated it. I’m with mom and brother and two cats, and I like not being alone (I was living alone before for 2 years in another city and I didn’t like it much). And right now the financial situation is not the best. But now I do feel I need to think about living alone in future. Not far away thought, as I like it here in this town a lot. But I guess that wish is also a step forward, as it’s something new to me. Like I’m finally wanting to be mature and independent.

    I also try to meditate / practice mindfulness in the evening and in the morning. Well, I do wish to try to do it more, even when I’m walking or drinking tea or not to think too much about my situation when I’m at work, but I don’t always manage that.
    I’m a bit calmer and I don’t have any panic attacks or similar.. But my fear that I will stay alone, without family, marriage or kids, still exists. I’m trying to work on that.

    Rhaenys
    Participant

    @Shelbyville and @Tim, thank you so much for your support.

    Shelbyville, I’m really glad it’s going so good with you and the new guy, congrats! Maybe you just needed to relax a bit… It also gives me hope in a way.

    About your job, I agree it’s a good plan for you to wait and see how it’s going, maybe until Christmas.

    Tim, I have cats (2), but I love dogs too, I love Animals. When younger, I wanted to have a dog, but we lived in the appartment and parents didn’t wan’t dogs in appartment, and then my mom agreed on cats… I love them and they are really support for me. And I also experienced a loss years ago.

    About proposing, wow, that’s really nice and brave of you how you appreciate her, you are really an amazing boyfriend. I don’t really have an advice… I guess if I love someone, I would just appreciate it for the act, and wouldn’t care that much how he did it (it doesn’t have to be on a trip, on the top of the Eiffel tower or something similar). May I ask how long are you together?

    I really agree with the part you said abou how every relationship is a risk… You guys also gave me not just support today, but hope, since you also experienced break up and grew stronger from it. I guess soon after break ups it may seem it will never get better, but it will, and that happened to me too, more times before.

    I’ve been better yesterday and today. I seem to need a lot of rest and sleep lately so I do that, and I sleep pretty good most of the times. Work is a bit hard, I’m not inspired at all. It actually has a potential and it’s not easy or boring, but human relations are not the best and I’m just not inspired by it these days. But I don’t want to make any harsh change now, I think I will let it be and wait if maybe an opportunity arises, instead of actively seeking new job just yet, in this circumstances.

    Also, these Covid times make it hard of me, since I don’t see many opportunities to go somewhere or meet people, which seems I have a need for now. My friends mostly don’t go as much out, since they are mostly in relationships, so I’m thinking of reaching to some other people maybe. Not anything risky of course, all events are under measures anyway.

     

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 6 months ago by Rhaenys.
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