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Posts tagged with “habits”

The Magic of Celebrating Every Little Win

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“Celebrate what you want to see more of.” ~Tom Peters

In a world that often only celebrates grand achievements, it’s easy to overlook the small victories that pave the way to lasting change.

BJ Fogg, PhD, a Stanford behavioral scientist and author of the transformative book Tiny Habits, offers a powerful insight: If we want to get great at creating habits, we must celebrate. He insists that immediately after we do our new habit, or even approximate it, we must celebrate. This. Isn’t. Optional.

Why is celebration so crucial? That’s what wires the habit into our brain. When we …

The Subtle (Yet Huge) Perspective Shift That Changed My Life

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“Dear self: Don’t get so worked up over things you can’t change or people you can’t change. It’s not worth the anger buildup or the heartache. Control only what you can. Let go. Love me.” ~Unknown

When I was furloughed from work back in the early months of 2020, I suddenly found myself with more time on my hands than I knew what to do with. I realized it was the freest time I’d had since I was a child on my summer holidays.

But that Covid-related break was much longer than six weeks; it was three long months. The …

Why I Love My Sober Life: Everything I Gained When I Quit Drinking

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“Sobriety was the greatest gift I ever gave myself.” ~Rob Lowe

I tried and failed to have a fabulous relationship with alcohol for many years.

When my children were tiny, I drank far more than was good for me, thinking I was relaxing, unwinding, socializing, and having fun. I’d seen my life shrink down from a world with lots of freedom and vibrancy to a socially restricted void, and I wanted to feel normal. I wanted to join in with everyone else.

All my birthday cards had bottles of gin or glasses of fizz on them, all the Friday afternoon …

How Your Worst Days Can Shape Your Best Self

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“It is often those moments you feel least connected that you are actually making your greatest progress. The chaos around you is an invitation to pause, reflect, and grow. You are more than equipped to deal with this. If you weren’t, you wouldn’t be here.” ~Benjamin P Hardy

It’s 1 a.m., and the silence is broken by a cough that can only be described as sounding like someone who has smoked two packs daily for the last thirty years. There’s no way to predict when I’ll be woken again, but if the past week is any indication, this won’t be …

Don’t Underestimate the Power of Small Habits

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How to Live a ‘Good Life’ (Almost Every Single Day)

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“If your vision of your life centers on your highest values, you will be aligned with your dharma far above everyday existence. Whatever the values are—love, creativity, service, spiritual growth, beauty, or whatever you choose—dedicating yourself to the highest values unites purpose and inner growth as nothing else can.” ~Deepak Chopra

I wasted almost a decade of my life. Don’t make the same mistake as me.

On my fortieth birthday, I found myself lying in bed, fully awake at 5 a.m., with a tightness in my throat.

“A new decade,” I thought, without much excitement.

Staring at the ceiling, I …

Looking Back: The Silver Linings of the Pandemic and Why I’m Grateful

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“You gotta look for the good in the bad, the happy in the sad, the gain in your pain, and what makes you grateful, not hateful.” ~Karen Salmansohn

The 2010 decade was difficult for me. Hardly a year went by without someone close to me passing away.

When the tragic decade started, I was in the midst of my residency training and free time was a luxury I did not have. When I graduated and became an attending physician, I was too busy caring for patients on my own to take a break.

In 2018, my world was shattered …

How I Stopped Being Everything I Hated About My Parents

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“The beautiful thing about life is that you always change, grow, and get better. You aren’t defined by your past. You aren’t your mistakes.” ~Unknown

When I was an angsty fourteen-year-old, I remember screaming at my parents that I never (ever!) wanted to become like either of them. And I meant it.

My dad was a workaholic who was never at home. When he was at home, he was emotionally unavailable, arguing with my mother, or he’d escape the stress of our house by going to the betting shop to gamble.

My mother had erratic mood swings, did not allow …

Stop Waiting for Perfection and Fall in Love with Your Life Now

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I know, so cliché, right? I can practically hear your eyes roll. But hear me out.

In a society driven by results, achievements, and ideals of perfection, there is a huge pitfall that I am becoming increasingly aware of—that we can be so focused on trying to achieve our “best life” that life itself could pass us by and we would have missed it. Missed the beauty of just being here.

We’ve all heard the sayings “Slow down and smell the roses” and “Life is a journey, not a destination.” We hear these sayings and pass them off as embroidery …

Change Made Easy: How to Get Unstuck by Doing What You’re Already Doing

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“Don’t wait for your feelings to change to take action. Take action and your feelings will change.” ~Barbara Baron

You are stuck because you are waiting to want to do the things you know you need to do to get better. You aren’t doing the things you know you need to do because you don’t want to feel bad, but you already feel bad. You are already doing what you don’t want to do. Why not choose to do something that you don’t want to do that will actually move you forward?

If you are waiting to want to do …

How I Got Sober and What I Now Know About the Impacts of Alcohol

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“Sometimes deciding who you are is deciding who you’ll never be again.” ~Anonymous

May 13th, 2011. I finally surrendered to the fact that I had a drinking problem and desperately needed help. The comments from acquaintances, the concern from friends, the complaints from my flatmates, the intensity of my depression, the conversations with my therapist—they all culminated in the decision that I had to break the chains from my liquid abuser.

It was one of the hardest decisions of my life, one that entailed waving goodbye to the life that I had led before and diving into a …

What Happiness Means and How I’m Boosting My Day-to-Day Joy

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“Don’t let this silly world trick you into starving your soul for material things. Cause someday you’re gonna be sitting out under the sun and realize how little you actually need to be truly happy.” ~Brooke Hampton

Three years ago, at the height of pandemic, I made many pitchers of lemonade from scratch. This newfound ritual was one of the better things about being on lockdown.

I’d hand squeeze a big bag of lemons for about one-third cup of juice, and experiment by adding vanilla extract, mint, and tablespoons of honey. I’d bring my drink outside, where I sat for …

Obsessed with Healthy Eating? 9 Things I’ve Learned Since Recovering from Orthorexia

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“Sending love to everyone who’s doing their best to heal from things they don’t discuss.” ~Unknown

I used to obsess over healthy eating, and I mean OB-SESSSSS. I spent virtually every waking moment thinking about food. What should I eat today? Is there too much sugar in that? What will I eat when we go out next week? Should I claim that I’m allergic to gluten?

Although I didn’t know it at the time, I was suffering from orthorexia (that is, an unhealthy obsession with healthy eating). Yes, I fully agree that eating nutritious food is good for you—there’s few …

The Science of Happiness: 9 Feel-Good Tools to Boost Your Mood

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“Remember, being happy doesn’t mean you have it all. It simply means you’re thankful for all you have.” ~Unknown

I remember sitting on the New York City subway, tears streaming down my face, armed with valium and lithium along with other antidepressants that my psych had just prescribed.

I was desperate, in that cave I had come to know as depression. Dark, hopeless, fearful depression. The cold metal seat of the subway made me feel raw and exposed. I couldn’t function. I couldn’t stop crying. I was panicked that I would be like this forever.

That was an example of …

Movement, Stillness, and Insight: My 3 Daily Non-Negotiables for a Busy World

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“Put yourself at the top of your to-do list every single day and the rest will fall into place.” ~Unknown

We live in a busy world. There is always something, or someone, fighting for our attention. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed. It’s easy to lose the time we need for ourselves. The white space in our days is often the first thing to get squeezed out as demands on our time escalate.

To combat this pull to overwhelm, I decided to create a list of daily non-negotiables.

Having a list of non-negotiables means I get to control at least a …

A Life Full of Favorites: The True Essence of Minimalism

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“Happiness can only be found if you free yourself from all other distractions.” ~Saul Bellow

What was your favorite toy as a child? Mine was a Spider-Man action figure. The limbs were adjustable, and there was a switch on his back that made his eyes light up.

I played with that toy for years, even after his fingers broke off and his switch got stuck. While I had plenty of toys as a child, this is the one I remember best.

Maybe you notice a similar trend in your own children. According to a study conducted by British researchers, the …

Why We Often Fail When We Set Big Goals and What Actually Works

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“You do not rise to the level of your goals, you fall to the level of your systems.” ~James Clear

If you pull up any popular motivational video today, you’ll probably hear things like “Set big goals!” and “Aim high and don’t stop until you get there!”

After watching a video like this, you may get inspired and start mapping out your plan to leave the 99% in the dust.

And typically, because you’re riding a wave of motivation, you’ll write out these monstrous, Mount-Everest-like goals. These goals paint a picture of your life that is so exciting that …

The Simple Path to Change When You’re Not Satisfied with Your Life

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“Making a big life change is scary, but you know what’s even scarier? Regret.” ~Zig Ziglar

Fifteen years ago, I made one of the biggest changes in my life. It was something I had wanted to do for so long but had never found the right time, right plan, or courage to do.

You see, ever since I was in my teens, I had always felt I was meant to be somewhere else.

The town where I grew up was pretty perfect for raising young kids, but it just wasn’t for me as I entered adulthood. I always envisioned …

How to Create Happiness Outside of a Relationship and Enjoy More of Your Life

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“Remember, being happy doesn’t mean you have it all. It simply means you’re thankful for all you have.” ~Unknown

For many years I was single. But I wasn’t just a regular single, I was a miserable one.

Rather than enjoying a time in my life when I didn’t have to care about anyone else but myself and using it to devote my full attention to my purpose and passions, I chose to ride the “woe is me” train.

I would complain about being single daily and covet other women’s “luck” in dating. I would blame every guy I dated …

How 10 Minutes of Daily Meditation Can Calm Your Mind and Relax Your Body

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“Peace. It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in the midst of these things and still be calm in your heart.” ~Unknown

I began the morning with a meditation. After taking my dog out and brewing the coffee, I sat in my sunny living room, my little dog Frankie nestled beside me. I perched cross-legged, a blue pillow on my lap for warmth. I closed my eyes and began to focus on my breath.

When ten minutes passed, I raised my hands in appreciation. …