“When something bad happens you have three choices. You can let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.” ~Unknown
I’ve learned to be thankful for my first heartbreak.
Of course, at the time of the crime I struggled to see anything positive in it. … Read More
“Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.” ~H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
In my late thirties, I attended a workshop that was led by a group of coaches. One of the exercises we did was called the “future self-exercise,” a visualization that took me twenty years into my future.… Read More
“As one person I cannot change the world, but I can change the world of one person.” ~Paul Shane Spear
When I was 17 years old, I decided to make a change.
Instead of keeping my opinions to myself, I was going to start sharing them.
Every time I had a kind thought about someone, I was going to tell them.… Read More
“I have learned that to be with those I like is enough.” ~Walt Whitman
I take stuff for granted. I suspect you take stuff for granted.
It’s almost as if it can’t be helped. When things—family, friends, health, amenities, or money—occupy a place in our lives for years, we naturally begin to view them as commonplace; we assume they’ll forever be, just as they’ve always been.… Read More
“Find your Calcutta.” ~Mother Teresa
Something is missing in your life, isn’t it?
You’re working hard, trying to get ahead, doing everything you possibly can to make life just a little bit better. You’re trying to keep it all balanced, though. You won’t be one of those people who commits every waking second to work and the pursuit of career.… Read More
“By accepting yourself and being fully what you are, your presence can make others happy.” ~Jane Roberts
Several years ago, I was so unhappy with my harsh loneliness that I decided that I was going to try anything under the sun to build a social life and have friends that cared about me.… Read More
“Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be.” ~Sonia Ricotti
I was brought up in a family and culture that was riddled with fear.
My elders were terrified of the world and always on the defensive for something bad to happen. They believed that love meant closely protecting others from the dangers of the world and the pain of life.… Read More
“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.” ~Jack Kornfield
I never wanted to see a therapist. I imagined settling onto the storied couch and seeing dollar signs appear in concerned eyes as I listed the family history of mental illness, addiction, and abuse. I feared I’d be labeled before I’d ever been heard.… Read More
“You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free.” ~Thich Nhat Hahn
When you think you’re an evolved and conscious woman and your partner tells you in no unclear terms that you’re “hard to be with,” it does a number on you.
Those words landed like a well-aimed boulder, smashing the immaculate vision I’d created of evolving myself: an exemplary girlfriend who was “doing the work” to grow, to become generously loving, spiritually awake, and to wholeheartedly support and encourage her beautiful partner to open to his fullest potential.… Read More
“I now see how owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.” ~Brené Brown
I recently left a relationship that I was not happy in. Although my ex was definitely an unconditional lover, it painfully bothered me that the man I loved was not taking care of his responsibilities.… Read More
“Let our scars fall in love.” ~Galway Kinnell
We all bring our own baggage to any relationship. I know that my past relationships have shaped my approach to love and romance. When we seek out that special someone to share our life, the disappointments of our past relationships tends to get in the way of new discoveries.… Read More
“He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.” ~Lao Tzu
I’m at war with enoughness.
My stomach isn’t flat enough; I’m not extroverted enough; I don’t have enough money in my wallet; I’m not creative enough; I’m not getting enough work done.
There are times when the Jaws of Life cannot free me from my expectations and negative self-talk.… Read More
“I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind.” ~Khalil Gibran
I recently travelled to Malaysia for a friend’s wedding where I spent four delicious days communing with wild monkeys and feasting on sticky rice. The people were kind and warm, the culture rich, the trip magical.… Read More
“The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own.” ~Benjamin Disraeli
When I entered into a relationship with my ex-boyfriend four years ago, I felt I had found a kindred spirit. We met at a meditation retreat where we both volunteered in the kitchen.… Read More
“Before someone’s tomorrow has been taken away, cherish those you love, appreciate them today. “ ~Michelle C. Ustaszeski
My brother Greg and I were the closest of friends growing up, even if you weigh in the occasional tiff or disagreement we sometimes had.
We discovered our favorite toys together as kids, rode bikes side by side, and conquered video games as a two-man team.… Read More
“To have a friend and be a friend is what makes life worthwhile.” ~Unknown
I am fascinated by friendships.
Not the acquaintances you see occasionally or the Facebook friends who wouldn’t recognize you on the street.
I’m talking about your real people. The people who know and love the deepest parts of you.… Read More
“Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.” ~Raymond Lindquist
I’ve been processing my beliefs on courage since I turned 31.
When I was in my 20s and teens, my idea of courage was that you fight until the death, never give up, be the one to say the last word, and always, always prove your point.… Read More
“It is not enough to be busy; so are the ants. The question is: what are we busy about?” ~Henry David Thoreau
A couple of years ago my friends and I went on a weekend retreat to honor our dear friend’s 40th birthday. It was supposed to be a relaxing weekend filled with yoga and meditation at an ashram in the mountains.… Read More
“It is in the character of very few men to honor without envy a friend who has prospered.” ~Aeschylus
It’s crazy, isn’t it?
Your best friend enthusiastically shares some big news. You say all the right things and display the right emotions. But inside you’re burning up. Instead for feeling truly happy, you’re filled with uncontrollable envy.… Read More
“Waking up to who you are requires letting go of who you imagine yourself to be.” ~Alan Watts
When I was in third grade, I loved to hang upside down on the monkey bars on the playground of my all-girls school in Philadelphia.
I would lock my little pale knees over the gray steel rods and then carefully let my hands go to swing upside down, like a pendulum in a pleated skirt.… Read More