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Category “love & relationships”

What helps

Why We Shouldn’t Force Advice on People & What Actually Helps

“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” ~Stephen R. Covey

This is a post about listening.

I know it’s really unsexy. It’s a topic that’s like the sun; nobody looks …

Why Insecurity & Approval-Seeking Lead to Unhealthy Relationships

“Your relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship you have.” ~Robert Holden

As a child I was carefree and enthusiastic. Aren’t most kids? At some point, though, life began to impact me and to affect how I …

Broken heart

7 Clues You’re in an Unhealthy Relationship

By

“You don’t let go of an unhealthy relationship because you stop caring about them. You let go because you finally start caring about you.” ~Charles Orlando

Most of us have experienced the pain of being in an unhealthy relationship.

It …

Painting of two women

How to Speak to Someone About an Unspeakable Loss

“It’s not about saying the right things. It’s about doing the right things.” ~Unknown

Years ago, my family and I moved to a bucolic little town in New Zealand, where we were immediately swept up into a group of ex-pats …

Couple in a forest

10 Powerful Tips for Building a Deep, Lasting Love

“We are a work in progress with a lifetime contract.” ~Phyllis Koss

The priest at our wedding advised us, “It’s not enough to say, ‘I want to marry you’ just today. You’ve got to be able to say that every …

Concept of unity and friendship. Many multicolored paper people characters stand outdoor together

3 Things We Can All Do to Create Stronger, Happier Relationships

“Love is the absence of judgment.” ~Dalai Lama

I used to be one of those moms.

Let me explain.

I was a single mom for literally my daughter’s entire childhood. That’s okay—I was a control freak, so it really …

Fix your feelings

You Are Not Responsible for Anyone Else’s Emotions

“Rather than being your thoughts and emotions, be the awareness behind them.” ~Eckhart Tolle

“I don’t believe you,” I jutted out my chin like a petulant toddler. Collapsing back into the tufted leather loveseat, I conceded, “I want to believe …

Mean Words

What to Do When Words Hurt You (Just Like Sticks and Stones)

“I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet.” ~Gandhi

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.

Do you remember this saying from childhood? It was one I heard often …

Let go

You Can Have The Love You Deserve If You Just Let Go

“Even if it seems like it’s taking too long for what we want to arrive, it’s better to stay with the ache than abandon the desire.” ~Danielle Laporte

Last week when I was in the front row of a yoga …

Drunk or High at a Nightclub

What to Do When the World Doesn’t Get You

“Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity.” ~Pema Chödrön

For as long as I can remember, I have always been a little different, defiantly so.

I was that child who never liked cartoons. I was nicknamed “the little …

Conflict

A Simple Way to Confront Someone to Minimize Potential Conflict

“Peace is not the absence of conflict, but the presence of creative alternatives for responding to conflict” ~Dorothy Thompson

I used to think that in order to live a completely peaceful existence, there could never be any conflict in my …

Say no

How To Take Your Life Back From People Who Ask for Too Much

“It’s not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and to make your happiness a priority.” ~Mandy Hale

It sucks, doesn’t it?

People who ask too much of you?

People who steal your time and drain your energy.…

If Self-Love Seems Difficult, Start with Self-Like

“It’s not your job to like me. It’s mine.” ~Byron Katie

Self-love is a word that gets used a lot. Overused, in fact.

The pressures and associations around the phrase “self-love” are immense. At school, we actually tore apart girls …

Happy Couple

Why We Can’t Have Healthy, Happy Relationships Without Self-Love

“Worry about loving yourself instead of loving the idea of other people loving you.” ~Unknown

Body image and self-love have been my biggest struggles. They’ve affected every area of my life, including relationships.

I developed anorexia in high school after …

Cartoon teamwork holding hands / happy cooperation

True Connection Happens When We Release Cynicism and Judgment

“Everyone you will ever meet knows something you don’t.” ~Bill Nye

It’s cool to be a little cynical, right? We’ve all seen the movies; we know an air of ennui and a well-cultivated sneer is all a person needs to …

Broken Heart

3 Ways to Tell If You’re in an Unhealthy Relationship

“The harder you fight to hold onto specific assumptions, the more likely there’s gold in letting them go.” ~John Seely Brown

It was Christmas night and I was ecstatic. He would be there any minute.

I touched up my gloss …

Comforting friend

What Not to Say to Someone Who’s Going Through a Breakup or Divorce

“Good friends help you to find important things when you have lost them…your smile, your hope and your courage.” ~Doe Zantamata 

Divorce or the end of a long-term relationship is one of hardest, if the not the hardest, trial you …

Not Broken

Why Self-Help Shouldn’t Be About Trying to “Fix” Yourself

“Stop trying to ‘fix’ yourself; you’re not broken! You are perfectly imperfect and powerful beyond measure.” ~Steve Maraboli

The other day I had some time to kill before a meeting, so I decided to go to one of my favorite …

Depressed young crying woman - victim

Why We Should Stop Trying to “Fix” Other People’s Pain

“There is such a deeply rooted belief that we must do something with intense surges of feeling and emotion as they wash through: understand them, determine their cause, link them to some life circumstance or person, transform them, transmute them,

Conversation Bubbles

The Art of Conversation: Stop Zoning Out and Waiting to Talk

“Let us make a special effort to stop communicating with each other, so we can have some conversation.” ~Mark Twain

Some of the most memorable experiences in our lives revolve around the conversations we have with others.

Talking to your …

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