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Search Results for "anxiety" — 1283 posts

Fear Can Only Hurt Us If We Let It

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“Fear keeps us focused on the past or worried about the future. If we can acknowledge our fear, we can realize that right now we are okay. Right now, today, we are still alive, and our bodies are working marvelously. Our eyes can still see the beautiful sky. Our ears can still hear the voices of our loved ones.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

I lay in bed staring into the darkness feeling physically ill with an acute sense of anxiety the like of which I hadn’t experienced in quite some time.

It felt like I had a soccer ball sized, black, …

You Have a Choice: Your Future Can Be Better Than Your Past

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“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this, too, was a gift.” ~Mary Oliver

On the January 17, 2000, I was in a car crash. I was living in France at the time. I don’t remember much about the crash. I know that we all walked out of the car relatively unscathed. Shocked, scared, and confused, yes. Injured, no.

I remember thinking that I should probably call my mum and dad back in England. Tell them what happened. What I didn’t know in that moment was that back in …

A Powerful Guide for People-Pleasers (and a Giveaway!)

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Update: The winners for this giveaway are Galit Erez and Granny Nate.

I’ve often wondered if I suppressed my tears when I was born, in fear of upsetting the doctor and my parents.

I wouldn’t be surprised to learn this about myself, as many of my childhood memories involve a fear of causing trouble, and an even greater fear of the consequences.

As I grew older, I began to shape-shift to please the people around me. It was exhausting, but I frequently tried to control their perception of me so I could feel confident I was likely to receive …

40 Ways to Let Go of Anger Right Now

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“You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger.” ~Buddha

Anger is merciless.

It leaves you feeling torn up inside.

Your head pounds. Your jaw locks. And your muscles scream. Every inch reels in pain with the electric shock that shoots through you.

You can’t eat, or sleep, or function like a rational human being.

You’ve good reason to be afraid of unleashing that screaming monster of rage lurking inside you. You’ll likely lose control, lash out, and retaliate.

Even though you have been wronged, you’ll end up feeling guilty, ashamed, even horrified by …

How Losing All Hope Can Be Freedom

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“Losing all hope was freedom.” ~Edward Norton in Fight Club

We naturally think of hope as a positive thing, as we do freedom, but this quote says that losing hope brings freedom. It may seem contradictory, but losing hope has been my most unexpected lifesaver.

My Mental Breakdown

I struggled with severe anxiety four years ago. The onset was abrupt.

Until I was twenty-five, I was the healthiest person I knew. I never got sick, would play basketball six hours straight, and always felt great. That changed suddenly in 2011.

I woke up one morning with an itchy spot on …

5 Habit Makeovers That Will Help You Turn Your Life Around

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“Learn how to cope, sweet friend. There will always be dark days ahead.” ~Kris Carr

Around this time four years ago, my life was a mess.

Work-wise, I felt like I had hit a wall. The relationship I was in (or so I thought I was) was turning out to be a one-way street on which I was being taken for a long, long, painful ride.

Taking care of myself was something I did only when I remembered to, or during unpredictable moments of clarity or calm within the little emotional tornado I was spinning around and around in.

Just …

How to Overcome Emotional Overload When You’re Highly Empathetic

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“When someone throws you a stone, throw back a flower.” ~Gandhi

“Ouch,” I cried out instinctively as my husband, Barry, and I walked through the beach parking lot, barefoot. It was only when Barry turned to me and asked me why I yelled out that I realized it was him who stubbed his toe, and not me.

“Because it hurts,” I answered him. He looked at me curiously and said, “But it didn’t hurt you. It hurt me. I’m the one who stubbed my toe.”

It hadn’t dawned on me that feeling other people’s pain wasn’t a “normal” reaction.

All …

6 Fears That Keep You Busy and How to Enjoy More of Your Life

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“All the mistakes I ever made in my life were when I wanted to say no, and said yes.” ~Moss Hart

Do you ever feel like you’re always too busy to truly enjoy life?

I know the feeling.

I work multiple jobs to care for my family and have many responsibilities at work and at home. My to-do list never seems to end, leaving precious little time for leisure and rest.

But here’s the funny thing: whenever I do have some downtime, my anxiety kicks in because I’m thinking about all the things I “should” do to help move my …

Keep Your Heart Open to Love When Life Knocks You Down

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“Only to the extent that we expose ourselves over and over to annihilation can that which is indestructible be found in us.” ~Pema Chodron

I was nineteen weeks pregnant when my husband and I went for a routine ultrasound. We were to confirm that our child’s anatomy was as it should be, and we were to discover our child’s sex.

We were choosing names in the waiting room. We ran into the receptionist at the fertility clinic and exchanged hugs. We had graduated from the clinic. The tuition was expensive and the education detailed and grueling. But we were a …

Be Your Own Role Model: Visualize Your Way to Your Goals

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“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” ~Buddha

One day, I’d had enough.

I heated up my yoga studio, rolled out my mat, and prepared to change this voice that I am embarrassed to admit torments me every day.

I stood at the top of my mat, closed my eyes, and tuned into my inner voice.

“I am tired.”

“I should …

How To Stop Being A Slave To Your Emotions

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“I don’t want to be at the mercy of my emotions. I want to use them, to enjoy them, and to dominate them.” ~ Oscar Wilde

Would you describe yourself as emotional?

Do you feel like your mood can change instantly according to what happens in your day?

Then you may be a slave to your emotions.

Being an emotional person and leading with the heart can both be great qualities. Leaning into our feelings allows us to be more self-aware and helps connect us to others. But if we allow our emotions to dictate how we live our lives, …

5 Life-Changing Lessons You’re Never Too Old to Learn

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“Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” ~Confucius

My son was only a year and a half old when I left his father and began my journey as a single parent. I never in a million years thought I would be raising my child alone. But away I went, with no clue as to what I was doing. I figured I’d learn as I went.

I knew I wasn’t going to be one of those moms that are too strict, too overbearing, and too controlling. I wanted my child to grow up with some freedom, some …

6 Things to Keep in Mind When You’re Trying to Make New Friends

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“No person is your friend who demands your silence, or denies your right to grow.” ~Alice Walker

When I was young, I never actively wanted friends, probably because I didn’t know the benefits of having strong friendships. I got along fine in my social circle in high school, in part because I could translate Latin more quickly than my classmates, which was helpful to some of them, and because I was pleasant enough.

I wasn’t going to get on anyone’s nerves, at least not on purpose. In fact, I was so careful not to be a bother to anyone …

How to Overcome Unhealthy Cravings When You’re Feeling Down

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“Your worst enemy cannot harm you as much as your own unguarded thoughts.” ~Buddha

As a kid, I was taught that the Devil tempted us to do evil deeds. When I had the urge to do something naughty, I imagined a pitchfork-totin’ demon whispering into my ear. He’d encourage me to steal that Hershey’s bar from the 7-11, or to lie to my mom when she asked if I’d finished my homework.

Today, I don’t believe in the existence of the Devil, but I do believe my doubts and fears can appear to be downright devilish—if I give in to …

9 Tips To Tame Your Temper: Anger Management Made Easy

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“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” ~Mark Twain

I am in serious danger, and I think you might be too.

I am in danger of becoming a grumpy old person. I get angry easily. I operate on a short fuse, ready to snap or explode at the littlest thing.

I could blame it on a combination of genetics and environment. My father seems to have only two moods, and one of them is angry.

He is like a volcano and can …

A Life-Changing Guide for Emotionally Sensitive People (and a Giveaway!)

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Update: The winners for this giveaway have been chosen:

You’re too sensitive. You’re making a big deal out of nothing. Why are you letting that bother you? Why can’t you just let it go? Really, you’re crying? What’s wrong with you? 

If you’re an emotionally sensitive person, like me, you may have heard some of these phrases throughout your life. And, like me, you may have concluded that your emotions made you tragically flawed.

For the longest time, I felt a deep sense of shame about my sensitivity. And I found it difficult to deal with …

Letting Go of Difficult Emotions eBook (Name Your Own Price!)

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“If you let go a little, you will have a little peace. If you let go a lot, you will have a lot of peace.” ~Ajahn Chah

Growing up, I often felt emotionally overwhelmed, causing others to call me “too sensitive.”

It was very clear to me from a young age that emotion was a sign of weakness, but try as I may, I couldn’t escape mine.

I believed there was something wrong with me for feeling so deeply—that I was fundamentally bad because of it—then I felt bad about my inability to change.

As the years went on and …

It’s Okay to Need a Little Help

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“Don’t look for someone who will solve all your problems. Look for someone who won’t let you face them alone.” ~Unknown

It’s 2004, and I awake in a student college in Melbourne, Australia. This comes as no surprise, because, at the time, I lived there.

I groggily stagger to the shared bathroom on my floor, to perform my morning washing routine. There’s nothing unusual about my lavatory procedure, so I’ll omit the details, for all of our benefits.

So far, so good. Already I’m full of optimism for today.

As I wash my hands, I glimpse myself in the …

A Powerful Way to Motivate Yourself to Pursue What You Want

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“See the positive side, the potential, and make an effort.” ~Dalai Lama

Until fairly recently, I was somewhat afraid of talking to girls.

Well, that’s not exactly true. I was afraid of talking to girls if I had a romantic intent. If it was an innocuous conversation, I could be cool as a cucumber.

As you can imagine, this stifled my romantic life somewhat. If I met someone and things were going well, once I realized that she liked me a little and I could move things forward, I would freeze up. Self-sabotage.

This was very frustrating to me, …

What Would Your Future Look Like If You Took a Leap of Faith?

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“In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take, relationships we were afraid to have, and the decisions we waited too long to make. ” ~Unknown

Have you ever thought about making a big change in your life?

Chances are, just that very idea produces a mild sense of anxiety and discomfort. But what if you were to actually go ahead and make that change? What would that look like, what would that feel like?

A rhetorical question, I realize. You only know if you go through with it. If you don’t, you will never know. It’s a …