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Posts tagged with “Fear”

How to Stop Worrying: 5 Things to Try When Nothing Else Works

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“I’ve been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.” ~Mark Twain

If you’re like me—a worry prodigy from a young age—you hate when people say, “Don’t worry about it.” As if it were so easy, as if I hadn’t already tried.

I’ve used many of the tips and tricks out there. Some of them helped for a while, but few did much for long.

The trouble is, most of the advice out there only addresses the symptoms of worry. It’s like taking cherry-flavored cough syrup when you have bronchitis: tempting, and probably the most …

Don’t Let Your Fear Paralyze You

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When Fear and Panic Win: How to Deal with Anxiety

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“Anxiety happens when you think you have to figure out everything all at once. Breathe. You’re strong. You got this. Take it day by day.” ~Karen Salmansohn

As much as I believe that you can move through fear to do whatever it is that you want to do, sometimes fear wins.

Sometimes, try as you might, you can’t push yourself forward. You retreat, worn, battle scarred, banged up, and with your tail between your legs.

You wave your white flag. You surrender.

Fear wins.

But it is in this moment of loss that you can learn some very important things.…

What You Need to Know When You’re Considering a Big, Scary Change

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“May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.” ~Nelson Mandela

Ten months ago I found myself floating on my back in an outdoor pool somewhere in California. Overhead was a clear blue sky, leaves dancing in the breeze, and birds singing their morning song.

I felt more alive in that moment than I had in years. And so I made a promise to myself, right there and then, not to forget this feeling. I made a promise that I’d follow it. I made a promise that this feeling wouldn’t just be a three-month trip to a new country, but …

Why Self-Help Shouldn’t Be About Trying to “Fix” Yourself

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“Stop trying to ‘fix’ yourself; you’re not broken! You are perfectly imperfect and powerful beyond measure.” ~Steve Maraboli

The other day I had some time to kill before a meeting, so I decided to go to one of my favorite places, Chapters Bookstore. When I walked in, I immediately headed toward the self-help section to pick up Brene Brown’s Rising Strong (great read, by the way).

As I was searching for her book, I noticed an unusual number of people browsing the same shelves, searching for their self-help book of choice.

Of course, there is nothing wrong with this. The …

How to Prevent Fear and Insecurity from Ruining Your Relationship

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“Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” ~Jack Canfield

Buried deep within the broken heart of every great loss is a nugget of wisdom. I experienced the greatest grief of my life just a few months ago, and with it came an opportunity to uncover ugly truths about myself I’d been hiding from.

In facing my pain, I have discovered that underneath the conscious, big-hearted, beautiful person that I am lives a small girl who is terrified of being misunderstood and abandoned by those she loves most.

The surface signs alerting me to these fears looked something …

4 Things You Need to Know When Pursuing An Ambitious Dream

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“So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then, when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable.” ~Christopher Reeve

Have you ever decided to pursue something that excited you, that seemed really hard to do, and then had your will tested and almost crushed? I have, many times, most recently this year.

As you may recall, I shared a blog post in January about the newly formed Tiny Buddha Productions, a film company I started with my fiancé, fellow screenwriter Ehren Prudhel.

If you haven’t read that post yet, you may want …

How to Reconnect with the Inner Light Below Your Pain

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TRIGGER WARNING: This post deals with an account of physical abuse and may be triggering to some people.

“What hurts you blesses you, darkness is your candle.” ~Rumi

We are all born with it. The beautiful bright light in our soul, filled with love and happiness.

I remember having that feeling of being so alive and free and untouched by fear or worry.

This is who we are at the core of our being. This is our true authentic self, from before the world told us who we needed to be and negative outside circumstances started to tear down …

Follow Your Heart, Not Your Fear: How to Make Choices That Are Right for You

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“Unnecessary fear of a bad decision is a major stumbling block to good decisions.” ~Jim Camp

Twenty years ago, my wife and I decided to move from Montréal, where we had lived for the first thirty-five years of our lives, to Nova Scotia, 800 miles away, where we had no connections whatsoever. Neither a small decision nor undertaking, since this involved our four kids and the entire contents of our house (not to mention a dog and two cats).

Why were we moving? We were not moving because of a job opportunity; we enjoyed the life we had in Montréal. …

5 Common Regrets and How to Avoid Them

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“I don’t regret the things I’ve done, I regret the things I didn’t do when I had the chance.” ~Unknown

If you had a second chance at life, what would you resolve to do differently? What would you regret from your past if you had the power to change it in your future?

In 2011, Bronnie Ware wrote a wonderful book called Top 5 Regrets Of The Dying.

As a palliative care nurse, Bronnie spent several years working with patients during their final weeks of life. She documented the dying epiphanies of her patients and began to notice some …

How to Transform Your Body by Coming from Love Instead of Fear

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“Fear is the opposite of everything you are, and so has an effect of opposition to your mental and physical health.” ~Neale Donald Walsch

My initial foray into health and fitness started from a deep place of fear.

I feared my weight and my appearance, always wondering what new trend I’d encounter in a magazine or on social media that would point out the latest way I was inadequate.

I feared the big health scares that we’re told could kill us at any moment if we aren’t careful. Diabetes. High blood pressure. Cancer.

Many of us have all been on …

Now Is the Time to Do the Things That Make You Happy

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“The trouble is you think you have time.” ~Buddha

When I first read this quote after graduating from college, I fell headfirst into a tailspin of “do it now, do it now, do it now.”

I had to travel the world, while doing yoga, and learning Spanish, and hiking the PCT, and living in different cities, and building my resume, and reading every book ever written.

With every check I put next to an item on my bucket list, I found ten new things that pulled me different directions. I tried to do it all and ironically, felt like …

When Something Has to Change: How to Push Yourself to Take Action

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“The truth you believe in and cling to makes you unavailable to hear anything new.” ~Pema Chodron

At some point, there comes a defining moment when you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you just can’t keep living the way you’ve been living.

You know that something has got to give and realize that you only have two options—either change or stay the same.

The idea of having to choose either one of those options feels absolutely unbearable, so you find yourself trapped between the two, in this awful purgatory of indecision.

That’s exactly where I was trapped: …

How to Beat Anxiety So You Can Live Life to the Fullest

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“Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” ~Jack Canfield

When I was in my twenties, I was confident and fearless, and I lived life to the fullest.

I remember going on vacation, and one of my friends was terrified to get on the plane. We had a four-hour flight ahead of us, and I thought her anxiety and fear of flying were ridiculous.

I thought she was being pathetic and selfish, and spoiling it for everyone else. I remember having a ‘quiet word’ with her and berating her for talking absolute nonsense. I had no empathy or …

How to Overcome Fear and Live Your Dream by Changing Your Brain

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“Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears.” ~Les Brown

Fear used to be the driving force in my life.

I didn’t even know that I was living in fear at the time. I hid behind labels like “stress” and “anxiety,” but those are just clinical terms for fear.

Truthfully, my dreams terrified me because they seemed way too big to achieve. At the time, I wanted to excel in my new career, get into the best shape of my life, and create meaningful relationships—and I felt like I had a long way …

What Causes Panic Attacks and How to Stop Them for Good

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“You empower what you fight. You withdraw power from what you release.” ~Alan Cohen

Panic attacks can seem to come out of nowhere, without any warning. There is no obvious logical connection between a panic attack and what is happening around us at the time they arise.

Is it really possible to be free of them, without medication? In my personal experience, the answer is yes. I used cognitive, emotional, and physical methods that eradicated my panic attacks.

What Causes Panic Attacks?

The short version of my story is that I experienced a less than peaceful upbringing and had a …

Why We Need to Stop Hiding and Let People See Who We Are

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“To help yourself, you must be yourself.” ~Dave Pelzer

I spent a lot of my life being someone else. Playing the part of someone I didn’t fully recognize.

Looking back, there were lots of reasons why I avoided being me, my mum’s suicide being one of them.

Her death shaped me, like a rock in a tumbler, and my life, as I knew it, bore no resemblance to the one I once knew.

I was ashamed of being the girl whose mum left her in such a violent way. What would people think? Maybe that she didn’t love me enough …

8 Things to Give Up

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Source: NotSalmon.com

Overcoming Imposter Syndrome So You Can Thrive and Shine

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“We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, handsome, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?” ~Marianne Williamson

I’ve been dreaming about dead bodies again—disposing of dead bodies. Given that I have never actually killed anyone it’s probably a little weird how often this crops up for me. My dream metaphors tend to be blatant and graphic. I think my subconscious mind really wants me to pay attention to them.

I don’t have recurrent dreams per se, but I do get recurring dream themes. Lately my subconscious has been knocking me over the head with …

5 Emotions We Try to Numb with Food (and How to Stop)

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“If music be the food of love, play on.” ~William Shakespeare

This quote holds a very special place in my heart.

Growing up, I was always surrounded by classical music. My grandfather loved the arts, and the first song I ever sang was “Edelweiss” from The Sound of Music.

I remember recognizing what it felt like to have a big voice come out of a tiny body, how powerful and scary that was.

Years passed, along with plenty of practicing and an expanded repertoire, and I found myself going to college to study vocal performance. This was where the …