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What Hurts Us the Most in Unhealthy and Unloving Relationships

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Once we make our relationship choices in an adult way, a prospective partner who is unavailable, nonreciprocal, or not open to processing feelings and issues, becomes, by these very facts, unappealing. Once we love ourselves, people no longer look good to us unless they are good for us.” ~David Ricco

One thing I particularly love is caring about someone and loving them. Being able to do so gives me a great sense of connection, satisfaction, and purpose. It’s fulfilling, life-enhancing, and simply feels wonderful.

All my life I’ve chased relationships so that I could get the love I need. …

8 Quick and Easy Meditation Techniques to Calm Your Anxious Mind

By in Blog, mindfulness & peace

Have you ever found it hard to motivate yourself to do something that was good for you, only to eventually do it, feel amazing, and wonder why you waited so long?

That’s what meditating was like for me. Even though I knew I could do it for only five minutes each day to feel calmer, less stressed, and more present, I found excuses not to do it regularly for years.

I’d tell myself five minutes wasn’t enough; I really needed thirty or more, and I didn’t have that time, so why bother?

I’d lament that I was too anxious to …

How I Know I’m Strong (and You Are Too)

By in Blog, change & challenges

“If there’s ever a tomorrow when we’re not together, there’s something you should remember: You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we’re apart, I’ll always be with you.” ~A.A. Milne

Two years ago, I was anticipating a monumental shift. I couldn’t tell you what had changed around that time, but my mindset was moving away from the brasher side of my natural, projected extroversion and seeking solace in the comforts of solitude.

It felt like the waves drawing back before a tsunami, and over …

Family Estrangement: 3 Stories and the Advice You Need to Hear

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Home is not a place, it’s a feeling.” ~Cecilia Ahern

This post is written by three people from different parts of the world who came together to share their story of family estrangement and their choice not to reconcile.

To the outside world, it seemed none of us were neglected. Our parents were well-educated. We grew up in decent homes, were given good educational opportunities, and had financial support. We looked like we came from perfect families, but….

Jen’s Story

On March 24, 2019, I received a chilling text from my sister that Grandma was found unconscious in her …

How to Successfully Cope with a Crisis Using Surrender

By in Blog, change & challenges, letting go

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be.” ~Sonia Ricotti

The scent of sanitizer once again pervades my home. And as much as I am grateful for it, every time I use it, that astringent, alcoholic smell takes me straight back to the out-patient chemo ward at the hospital.

It’s been nearly seven years since I was a fortnightly visitor there, but the sanitizer and masks make me feel like I’m in a weird …

When You Don’t Like Being Nice: What to Do Instead

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Don’t trade your authenticity for approval.” ~Unknown

As a nice person, I am often conflicted because sometimes I don’t enjoy being nice. Sometimes I act nice out of moral obligation or because I’m trying to be consistent with my perceived identity.

Do you view yourself as “nice”? Do others describe you as “nice”? Do you always enjoy being “nice”? If you are unsure how you are perceived by others, ask friends and family to describe you.

I’ve been told how nice I am all my life, by family, friends, coworkers, and even bosses. It was a huge part of my …

How to Appreciate Your Body (During COVID-19 and Always)

By in Blog

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Imagine if we obsessed about the things we loved about ourselves.” ~Unknown

I used to have a plaque with this quote prominently displayed in my waiting room. Sadly, it’s somehow gotten misplaced over the years.

What I remember most about the plaque was how it engaged, or disengaged, the people who noticed it. Did they mention the quote when they came into my office? Pointedly ignore it? Let me know that self-love is what they want for themselves? Or express skepticism …

The Most Important Lessons We Can Take from This Pandemic

By in Blog, change & challenges, love & relationships, mindfulness & peace

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“And the people stayed home. And read books, and listened, and rested, and exercised, and made art, and played games, and learned new ways of being, and were still. And listened more deeply. Some meditated, some prayed, some danced. Some met their shadows. And the people began to think differently.” ~Kitty O’Meara

While this pandemic is turning out to be a very confusing and difficult time for many people, it is undoubtedly giving humanity an incredibly rare opportunity to learn some …

Why I Want to Stop Judging and How This Opens My Heart

By in Blog, love & relationships

“The quicker you are in attaching verbal or mental labels to things, people, or situations, the more shallow and lifeless your reality becomes, and the more deadened you become to reality.” ~Eckhart Tolle

Things are hard right now, aren’t they? When I first started writing this article about my goal to drop labels so I could live without judgment, I was thinking I didn’t want to judge people at the gym based on what their T-shirts said.

Now I’m trying not to judge people in my local community and around the country for taking actions that make me feel …

The Challenge of Doing Less When You’re Used to Doing More

By in Blog, change & challenges, mindfulness & peace

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“I became an overachiever to get approval from the world.” ~Madonna

I have spent my entire life looking for more. More to do, more to achieve, and more to see.

I have always been a planner—meticulously planning everything from vacations to visits with friends to my life months (or years) ahead.

I plan because I’ve always wanted to fit in as much as possible in the finite time I was allotted. I never wanted to feel like time was wasted or …

My Cat Had Cancer and Taught Me How to Cope with Illness

By in Blog, change & challenges, mindfulness & peace

“A cat purring on your lap is more healing than any drug in the world, as the vibrations you are receiving are of pure love and contentment.” ~St. Francis of Assisi

We all know what it is like to be sick. At some point in our lives we get the flu or a bad cold, but we know the course—get lots of rest and before you know it you are as good as new. But for some of us, we live with chronic illness.

Chronic illness brings with it day-to-day symptoms, the ones you cannot get away from. Coping with …

Lost Your Job? Here Are 4 Things That Might Help

By in Blog, change & challenges

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Life isn’t always fair. Some people are born into better environments. Some people have better genetics. Some are in the right place at the right time. If you’re trying to change your life, all of this is irrelevant. All that matters is that you accept where you are, figure out where you want to be, and then do what you can, today and every day, to hold your head high and keep moving forward.” ~Lori Deschene

Like millions of people these …

5 Affirmations for Resilience in the Face of Uncertainty

By in Blog, change & challenges

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Embrace uncertainty. Some of the most beautiful chapters in our lives won’t have a title until much later.” ~Bob Goff

Let me tell you something important. It’s a rule of life, a law of nature if you will. This law is not only a psychological truth, but it’s also biological, chemical, cultural, maybe even metaphysical.

What I’m about to say is not comfortable, but it’s necessary. People who truly understand this principle are resilient and adaptive. Those of us who choose …

How to Come Out Stronger After Heartbreak

By in Blog, love & relationships

“And when I thought ‘I can’t go on,’ the universe expanded, mother earth hummed and the moon whispered, ‘Yes, you can’.” ~Wicked Words

Heartbreak. The feeling that so many of us would pay big (BIG) money to skip through. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard (and heard myself say), “I just want to skip this part and fast forward to when I feel better.”

I fell in love unexpectedly, but when is it ever expected? I had just gotten through an awful breakup and this perfect man for me fell from the heavens. He made me feel …

Book Giveaway, HumanKind: You’ll Laugh, You’ll Cry (Really!)

By in Blog

UPDATE: Brad has generously decided to give away seven books instead of five. If your name is listed below, please contact me at email(AT)tinybuddha(DOT)com with your address so I can share it with him! The winners are:

As I write this, I’m having one of those days. I feel so agitated it’s like there’s a tornado under my skin, yet so drained it took me five minutes to get my fingers to start typing words.

I’m guessing I’m not alone in feeling a lot of intense emotions …

Why Journaling is the Best Thing to Do During a Crisis

By in Blog, change & challenges

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“The difference between despair and hope is just a different way of telling stories from the same set of facts.” ~Alain de Botton

When I was told that the man I loved had a terminal illness, I instinctively reached for my journal. When I was asked to evacuate my home ahead of a category-5 cyclone three short weeks after his funeral, the first thing I threw into the back of my car was a large box with my journals.

That was …

How to Appreciate Life (Even During a Global Pandemic)

By in Blog, mindfulness & peace

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Life is what happens when you’re busy making plans.” ~John Lennon

When I was in my late twenties I went on a trip with my mom and brother to Scotland.

Though I was a bit trepidatious about spending so much time with my family, I was excited for the trip too. When it finally arrived, I couldn’t wait to see the gorgeous Highlands, tour ancient castles, and eat endless amounts of shortbread. When we got there, I did exactly that, and …

Surviving as an Empath During the Time of Coronavirus

By in Blog, change & challenges

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting and less scary.” ~Fred Rogers

If you are a human on earth at the moment, you’re likely feeling the uncertainty and anxiety of living in the time of a pandemic. It’s not something we have seen before in our lifetime, so every step is a new one, and the end is unknown and nowhere in sight.

Everyone is coping in their own way. Some are fearful and anxious …

Why We Feel Lonely and What to Do About It

By in Blog, love & relationships

“At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.” ~Lau Tzu

With social distancing measures in place in response to the new coronavirus, many of us have a lot more time on our hands, while also being isolated.

This may also mean you’re feeling loneliness more intensely than you’ve experienced it before.

This is a good thing! Challenges can help us to understand ourselves on a much deeper level than we would have if we weren’t challenged—precisely because our feelings are more intense.

Loneliness is not new. …

Don’t Let Hope Keep You Stuck

By in Blog, change & challenges

“I hope that this whole COVID-19 thing goes away so we can resume our regular lives.”
“I hope this quarantine will be over soon!”
“I hope that things will go back to how they used to be.”

You may be thinking, wishing, or even hoping these things—and are just waiting for things to get better. That was definitely me the first few weeks of quarantine.

Recently I’ve been pondering the possibility that COVID-19 may actually never go away and we may have to learn to adapt and live with it. It may be like influenza—seasonal, with a recommended shot, and …