Happiness Is Letting Go
Why I Had to Stop Judging Myself to Start Healing from Childhood Trauma
“I now see how owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.” ~Brené Brown
A few years ago, when I began recovering from childhood trauma, the first thing I learned was that I needed to master the skill of self-awareness.
However, becoming aware came with some pretty hard truths about who I was, what I did, and how I acted because of what had happened to me.
Although I eventually found the courage to face some challenging experiences from my past, I wasn’t ready to forgive and accept myself.
When …
FREE Global JOY Summit! Dalai Lama, Desmond Tutu and More…
Hi friends! I’m excited to invite you to the upcoming Global Joy Summit, a FREE online even running from November 13th to 16th.
This is an amazing opportunity to be inspired by the contagious joy and timely message of the Dalai Lama and the late, great Archbishop Desmond Tutu, and learn from 30+ renowned joy scientists, spiritual teachers, changemakers, and artists.
The lived experiences of these two global icons, and self-described “mischievous brothers,” serve as a profound example of the power of joy in the face of adversity. They teach us that joy is an essential key …
The 5 Happiness Zappers and What Helps Me Cope with Them
“Emotion in itself is not unhappiness. Only emotion plus an unhappy story is unhappiness.” ~Eckhart Tolle
When my mother told me, “Honey, you don’t understand; you can’t,” initially I felt like she was being condescending.
It was Mother’s Day and, unbeknownst to me, the last time I’d see her before her final hospital visit.
We’d spent that Saturday updating her computer, watching waves at the beach, and picking up seashells, then eating dinner at a popular local restaurant frequented by travelers, including famous musicians on tour buses because of its location off of the interstate.
By early evening, we were …
Children’s Movies are Obsessed with Death, but Don’t Show Healthy Grief
“Grief is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.” ~Jamie Anderson
I knew my son was watching me. We were inhaling fistfuls of popcorn while Frozen 2 played on the screen above. (Spoiler alert…)
Anna has just realized her sister, Elsa, is dead, frozen solid at the bottom of a river. Anna must carry on life without her.
My son …
5 Life Lessons from a Brain Tumor That Could Have Killed Me
“Life is a balance between what we can control and what we cannot. I am learning to live between effort and surrender.” ~Danielle Orner
I was slumped against a wall at Oxford Circus Station early one Sunday evening when an irritated male voice suddenly barked, “MOVE!”
Moments beforehand, I had lost my vision.
Without conscious thought, I muttered, “RUDE!” and staggered off without clearly seeing where I was going.
It was only months later, on retracing my steps at Oxford Circus, that I realized I’d been blocking his view of some street art.
I’d allowed a guy to bully me …
How I Learned to Love My Body Instead of Hating Her
“Your body does not need to be fixed, because your body is not a problem. Your body is a person.” ~Jamie Lee Finch
I was thirty years old when I realized that I was completely dissociated from my body.
I grew up in the height of the purity culture movement in American Evangelicalism. Purity culture was based on one primary concept: abstain from sex until marriage. But the messaging went further than this.
I sat next to my peers in youth group while the male pastor stood on stage and told us young women to always cover our bodies. For …
Why Codependents Don’t Trust Themselves to Make Decisions and How to Start
“Slow, soulful living is all about coming back to your truth, the only guidance you’ll ever need. When you rush, you have the tendency to follow others. When you bring in mindfulness, you have the power to align with yourself.” ~Kris Franken
Codependency previously created a lot of pain and agony in my life. One of the ways it manifested was in my inability to trust myself. I would overthink decisions to death, fearful that I would choose the “wrong one” or upset someone if they didn’t agree or were disappointed by my choice.
I was terrified of “making a …
Freedom Is the Space Between Each Judgmental or Righteous Thought
“It is inner stillness that will save and transform the world.” ~Eckhart Tolle
Life is hard. Impenetrable at times. How can we use our spirituality to navigate through the density of life?
That question inspired this piece of writing. And my navigation tool is almost effortless; I feel compelled to share it.
When my mind is churning and burning with thoughts and fears and worries, I take myself off to a quiet place, get still, and watch my mind. I wait for the tiny gap between each thought. Bingo.
That space, that little gap, is freedom in its truest, purest …
Surrendering Isn’t Giving Up: Why We Need to Accept What’s Happened
“The first step toward change is awareness. The second step is acceptance.” ~Nathaniel Branden
I remember the last time I saw him before my world crumbled. I held up my hand with the ASL sign for “I love you” through the window to him as he mouthed the words back and got in his car to leave for work. I found out an hour later that he—my fiancé—had begun cheating on me a month before he had proposed.
He never fought for me. Even during the course of our relationship, when he would run away due to his insecurities, I …
Sometimes When Things Are Falling Apart…
One of the colorable quote pages from my new Inner Strength Journal (colored by yours truly)!
After the Assault: What I Now Know About Repressed Trauma
TRIGGER WARNING: This article details an account of sexual assault and may be triggering to some people.
The small park down the street from my childhood home: friends and I spent many evenings there as teenagers. We’d watch movies on each other’s MP3 players and eat from a bag of microwave popcorn while owls hooted from the trees above.
Twigs lightly poked against our backs. Fallen leaves graced skin. Crickets hummed in the darkness. The stars shone bright through the branches of the redwoods.
Eight years later at a park in Montevideo, Uruguay, darkness again surrounded me. Leaves and twigs …
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