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How to Get Your Point Across Calmly and Effectively

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Those that know, do. Those that understand, teach.” ~Aristotle

I’ve been mostly introverted for a majority of my life, often running away from issues that could cause a damaging conversation between me and another person.

Experience has taught me that when I get upset, I don’t naturally handle my hardship with grace.

I worked as a restaurant manager for some years, and it was just too easy to react to the frustration I felt when an employee disregarded my request that they stock the bathroom with paper towels or wash the front windows.

I would either explode or I would …

5 Steps to Learn from Anger

By in Blog, change & challenges, happiness & fun, letting go, mindfulness & peace

Anger

“Don’t wait for your feelings to change to take the action. Take the action and your feelings will change.” ~Barbara Baron

How do you feel about anger? Growing up, I always felt that anger was “bad.” In school and at home I learned that anger made people do “bad” things, and anger was a source of “evil” in the world.

I didn’t want any part of that! So, when things happened that made me angry (for example, getting bullied at school), I’d ignore the feelings of anger until they “went away.” I’d go home and cry, feeling these emotions …

Your Loving Presence Is Enough: Helping Someone Who’s Hurting

By in Blog, change & challenges, love & relationships

Hugging

“Wisdom is nothing more than healed pain.” ~Robert Gary Lee

As the only child of a single parent, my family of two was small and our relationship could be intense.

My southern belle mom, with her stories and easy laugh, her quick wit, and her love of all things literary was the mom who all my high school friends adored and loved—the one who my teenage friends could talk to when they were too angry or irritated with their own mother.

I loved her too, but I also worried about her. A lot. Because I knew a secret about her …

Compassionate Posting: Minimizing Social Media Comparisons

By in Blog, love & relationships, mindfulness & peace

Social Media

“We must each lead a way of life with self-awareness and compassion, to do as much as we can. Then, whatever happens we will have no regrets.” ~Dalai Lama

If you’re anything like me, you may have a love-hate relationship with social networking.

There are so many cool facets to social networking sites, such as Facebook, but I am finding that the relative ease of information sharing with the masses and portable nature of technology bring their own set of challenges. Not a bad thing, per-se, but perhaps an invitation to practice even greater mindfulness and compassion.

Consider the title

…

Draw My Life: Michelle Phan

By in Fun & Inspiring

She’s a YouTube sensation, with popular make-up tutorials that have received millions of hits. But what I’m most fascinated by is her personal story, and the empowering message she shares in her engaging “Draw My Life” video. We all have a story to tell, and we are part of something beautiful…

Don’t Wait for a Major Wake Up Call to Start Loving Your Life

By in Blog

Screen shot 2013-08-09 at 8.06.21 PM

“Sometimes in tragedy we find our life’s purpose. The eye sheds a tear to find its focus.” ~Robert Brault

“Lay still. We think both your arms are broken.”

I obeyed the police officer and stopped struggling to rise from the hard, cold pavement.

An ambulance soon had me in emergency, where I discovered that my problem was a lot worse than broken arms.

My right arm had to be amputated. My left arm was paralyzed. I had no more use of my arms.

I laughed my way through my long hospital stay.

No one could understand how a man who …

8 Lessons About Living Fully from a Journey of 500 Miles

By in Blog, happiness & fun

Walking

“The journey is the reward.” ~Proverb

I should start by clarifying that even though there’s a lot of walking involved in this story, I’m not a walker, or particularly sporty. So what was I thinking going on a 500-mile pilgrimage you may (rightly) ask? I wasn’t. I was feeling it. In my gut.

You know those butterflies that wreck havoc in your tummy when you have an exciting idea? Well, I had about a thousand of those. Butterflies, not ideas. I only had one idea, and I didn’t even think that one through.

El Camino de Santiago. St James Way. …

AJs Art Journal: Play

By in Fun & Inspiring

AJsArtJournal_Play

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Are You Stressed, Rushed, and Aggravated?

By in Blog, letting go, mindfulness & peace

Walking Through Airport

“Meaning is not what you start with but what you end up with.” ~Peter Elbow

As a boy, I had a romantic notion about having a job where I traveled for business. It sounded so important and stylish. I liked the idea of dashing through airports to my next big meeting.

I thought it meant that mine would be a wider world. And so it was.

Be Careful What You Wish For

As often happens, what you think about comes into being. I found myself on my very first “business trip.” I was going to the exotic location of Moline, …

The Power of Poise: How to Stop Losing Your Cool

By in Blog, change & challenges, mindfulness & peace

Poised

“Poise is an unseen power, and this unseen power is always ready to come to the aid of the outer action.” ~Sri Chinmoy

Poise is the seeker’s goal because poise is our highest state of consciousness. Poised, we are in a state of balance, composure, and equanimity, all of our powers at our disposal.

When I am able to achieve poise, I am present, connected, grateful, creative, and light-hearted. Poised, my love flows.

Like most of us, I have been poised much of the time, especially when life was easy, absent any major challenge. But I have also lost …

Happiness is Not a Destination: How to Enjoy the Journey

By in Blog, happiness & fun

Enjoy the Journey

“Happiness is a direction, not a place.” ~Sydney J Harris

Being happy is for most of us one of the key aims in life. But where we often go wrong is in figuring out which path to take to achieve that happiness.

My own path has been a somewhat unconventional one. In my last year at college, most of my peers were busy applying for full-time jobs with large companies, but I knew that wasn’t what I wanted to do. 

I wanted to see the world, which (long before gap years became so common) was met with disapproval by many. …

The Rabbit Hole of Stuff: Why We Can’t Buy Our Way to Happiness

By in Blog, happiness & fun, meaning & passion

“Happiness can only be found if you free yourself from all other distractions.” ~Saul Bellow 

When I was twenty I bought my first serious piece of furniture.

It was a sofa covered in a nubby sort of fabric, a creamy shade of white with tan and light brown threads woven through that made the modern style seem warm and welcoming.

It was beautiful. And on the day my sofa arrived, I celebrated. I celebrated not only a beautiful addition to my little apartment but also a step into adulthood.

After all, I bought it on credit, and I was thrilled …

Dealing with Dark Days: Help for When You Don’t Feel Your Best

By in Blog, change & challenges

“The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem.” ~Theodore I. Rubin

I live in a rainy city. For most of the winter it’s endless grey, weeks in which you’re lucky to get a glimpse of the sun at all.

It might be drizzling, it might be pouring, or it might be merely fog. It is certainly wet.

For me and a lot of the people who live here, it’s almost a deal breaker. When I first arrived, I spent a lot of time complaining that it was …

How Anger Leads to Anxiety and What to Do About It

By in Blog, mindfulness & peace

Calm

“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” ~Buddha

I have a confession: I’m mildly obsessed with anger.

Not the negative feelings, the volatile outbursts, or the fly-off-the-handle reactions, but rather how humans express anger.

I’ve largely made my living by dealing with various states of anger. More on that in a bit…

Years ago I was shopping at a bookstore with my friend Alex. We were first time parents with toddlers at home.

The idea was to find resources on …

Dharma Comics: If This Is the End

By in Fun & Inspiring

DharmaComics_LeahPearlman_IfThisIsTheEnd

Source

Why It’s Not Selfish to Ask Someone You Love for Help

By in Blog, love & relationships

Two People

“Learn to appreciate what you have before time makes you appreciate what you had.” ~Unknown

I’m a woman in midlife who thought she was set after a long successful career and the promise of financial security. I supported my own way through most of my life, fending for myself and then my two children, even during a 15-year marriage that ended badly and another that never really began.

For a number of reasons my plans for an early and secure retirement ended a few years ago. The long story is for another time; the short story is health, burnout, spiritual …

Discovering the Elusive Truth and Falling in Love with Yourself

By in Blog, love & relationships, mindfulness & peace

Woman and Trees

“Pleasure can be supported by an illusion, but happiness rests upon truth.” ~Sebastien-Roch Nicolas De Chamfort

In today’s world, we are bombarded day by day and moment by moment with images and messages of who we should be, what we should be doing, and exactly how we should be doing it.

The promises of happiness and fulfillment in those mirages of ultimate perfection are all too often shallow and elusive, constantly evading us and leading us time and time again to nothing more than dead ends and empty hopes.

With a natural craving for transcendence and supremacy, we grab our …

Buddha Doodles: You Deserve Downtime

By in Fun & Inspiring

Buddha_Doodles_Downtime_MollyHahn

Source: Buddha Doodles

Wabi Sabi: Find Peace by Embracing Flaws and Releasing Judgment

By in Blog, mindfulness & peace

Meditating

“Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.” ~Dalai Lama

Several years ago, a colleague and I were invited to give a presentation on mindfulness at our State Mental Health Conference. I was a novice and flattered to be asked.

Singing bowls, which are metal and look like a mortar and pestle, are useful tools in mindfulness practice. The bowl is placed on a cushion and, when struck, makes a beautiful sound like a bell.

The tone and pitch are determined by the size of the bowl and thickness of the metal. They’re …

5 Tips to Stop Making Comparisons and Feeling Bad About Yourself

By in Blog, change & challenges, love & relationships, mindfulness & peace

“The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.” ~Steve Furtick

I remember one day when I was around six years old, my older brother came home from school with one of those star-shaped highlighters that had a different color on each point. I laid my eyes on it and in that moment I wanted nothing more than I wanted that highlighter.

It didn’t matter that as a six year old, I had less use for it than paper shoes in rainy weather; I just simply had to have it.

Being the …

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