“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” ~Dalai Lama
I had an old trench coat that was balled up on the floor of my garage, gathering dust near the washing machine. It was raining. It was unusually cold (for California, anyway).… Read More
“The greatest gift is a portion of thyself.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Recently a friend asked me what kind of legacy I want to leave for future generations. It was an unexpected question that really got my wheels turning.
Usually when people pass away there is a huge focus on the things they owned and who gets what, and the idea of handing down ideas and values was a totally new way to look at it.… Read More
“You’re imperfect, and you’re wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging.” ~Brené Brown
I believe that it is part of the human condition to want love and connection with others. For some of us this comes much more naturally and abundantly than it does for others.
The universal thing we all share is that at some point along our life journey, there will come a time when our self-worth is on the table for questioning.… Read More
“In the midst of winter I discovered that there was in me an invincible summer.” ~Albert Camus
These words may ring true for anyone who has been through difficult times, then found themselves stronger as a person, or doing things they would have never thought possible.
In May 2011 my brother was kidnapped from his home while working in Nigeria.… Read More
“When we can no longer change a situation, we must change ourselves.” ~Victor Frankl
There are a million reasons why a friendship may change over time. You grow older, relocate for a job, have a fight, or start having kids.
It is an inevitable fact that life takes people in new directions; growing apart from old friends becomes a part of our lives.… Read More
“Don’t wait for extraordinary opportunities. Seize common occasions and make them great.” ~Orison Swett Marde
I stood at the library counter waiting to check out a stack of books when I overheard an overworked woman explain to the librarian why her books were late.
“My boss has me running his errands after hours.… Read More
“Good relationships don’t just happen. They take time, patience, and two people who truly want to be together.” ~Unknown
Out of our six loving years together, my partner and I spent two and a half years in a long-distance relationship. During these years there were times we communicated nearly daily, but there were also times when we couldn’t even email or text for a month at a time while I was living in an African village.… Read More
“The most important distinction anyone can ever make in their life is between who they are as an individual and their connection with others.” ~Anne Linden
After growing up in a household with extremely loose emotional boundaries, I soon learned the importance of establishing my own personal boundaries as quickly and clearly as possible.… Read More
“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” ~Mahatma Ghandi
My childhood was in many ways a nice childhood. I feel like a complete twit to complain about it. I know other people have gone through so much worse. I’ve read really difficult childhood stories and my heart literally bleeds for these people.… Read More
“Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.” ~H. Jackson Browne
The first time I was stung with the notion of a soul mate, I was twelve years old. I had accompanied my mother to the wedding of a family friend. The church was blissful, the bride beautiful, and the way the groom looked at her had me thinking that one day this would be me.… Read More
“When something bad happens you have three choices. You can let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.” ~Unknown
I’ve learned to be thankful for my first heartbreak.
Of course, at the time of the crime I struggled to see anything positive in it. … Read More
“Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.” ~H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
In my late thirties, I attended a workshop that was led by a group of coaches. One of the exercises we did was called the “future self-exercise,” a visualization that took me twenty years into my future.… Read More
“As one person I cannot change the world, but I can change the world of one person.” ~Paul Shane Spear
When I was 17 years old, I decided to make a change.
Instead of keeping my opinions to myself, I was going to start sharing them.
Every time I had a kind thought about someone, I was going to tell them.… Read More
“I have learned that to be with those I like is enough.” ~Walt Whitman
I take stuff for granted. I suspect you take stuff for granted.
It’s almost as if it can’t be helped. When things—family, friends, health, amenities, or money—occupy a place in our lives for years, we naturally begin to view them as commonplace; we assume they’ll forever be, just as they’ve always been.… Read More
“Find your Calcutta.” ~Mother Teresa
Something is missing in your life, isn’t it?
You’re working hard, trying to get ahead, doing everything you possibly can to make life just a little bit better. You’re trying to keep it all balanced, though. You won’t be one of those people who commits every waking second to work and the pursuit of career.… Read More
“By accepting yourself and being fully what you are, your presence can make others happy.” ~Jane Roberts
Several years ago, I was so unhappy with my harsh loneliness that I decided that I was going to try anything under the sun to build a social life and have friends that cared about me.… Read More
“Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be.” ~Sonia Ricotti
I was brought up in a family and culture that was riddled with fear.
My elders were terrified of the world and always on the defensive for something bad to happen. They believed that love meant closely protecting others from the dangers of the world and the pain of life.… Read More
“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.” ~Jack Kornfield
I never wanted to see a therapist. I imagined settling onto the storied couch and seeing dollar signs appear in concerned eyes as I listed the family history of mental illness, addiction, and abuse. I feared I’d be labeled before I’d ever been heard.… Read More
“You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free.” ~Thich Nhat Hahn
When you think you’re an evolved and conscious woman and your partner tells you in no unclear terms that you’re “hard to be with,” it does a number on you.
Those words landed like a well-aimed boulder, smashing the immaculate vision I’d created of evolving myself: an exemplary girlfriend who was “doing the work” to grow, to become generously loving, spiritually awake, and to wholeheartedly support and encourage her beautiful partner to open to his fullest potential.… Read More
“I now see how owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.” ~Brené Brown
I recently left a relationship that I was not happy in. Although my ex was definitely an unconditional lover, it painfully bothered me that the man I loved was not taking care of his responsibilities.… Read More