You Must Grow Through Dirt


“It is the way that we react to circumstances that determines our feelings.” ~Dale Carnegie
I can remember the incident so clearly.
A few years ago, my friends and I were all sitting around a table in a restaurant. It was the holiday season, and I was in good spirits. It was nice to see everyone again. The snow was drifting gently outside, reminding me of eggnog and Christmas trees.
After we ordered our food and took turns asking each other what we were up to, it was one of my friends’ turn to share. She casually mentioned that she …

“Social media should improve your life, not become your life.” ~Patrick Driessen
The summer after college, my best friend and I had many a girls’-night-in, largely to accommodate her new life as a single mother.
These nights consisted of drinking wine and Facebook stalking anyone and everyone who went to our high school.
One night we went as far as creating a false page representing a popular local bar so that we could peer into the lives of anyone our hearts desired without revealing ourselves as grade-A cyber stalkers.
We spent a lot of our downtime that summer focusing on …

“Happiness is a choice that requires effort at times.” ~Aeschylus
My twenty-sixth birthday was approaching, and I asked myself one question: “Do I want this year to look like the last one?”
The answer was an immediate and very solid no. I frantically began to analyze what I was doing with my life to get this reaction. I was unhappy for most of twenty-five, romantically, professionally, and socially.
I had been with my live-in boyfriend for about a year and a half, and there seemed to be a growing disconnect. Despite the lies, resulting in jealousy and insecurity, I stayed …

Update: The winners for this giveaway are:
If you’re a fan of uplifting, action-oriented blog posts, you may have stumbled upon Positively Present at some point in time.
I “met” the site’s founder, Dani DiPirro, around the time I started Tiny Buddha. Over time, I grew to admire her dedication, both to personal development and her blog.
Since 2009, she’s shared countless helpful, inspiring posts, empowering readers to live mindfully and positively in the face of life’s inevitable challenges.
Now she’s preparing to launch a new book, The Positively Present Guide to Life, which offers …

“When you recover or discover something that nourishes your soul and brings joy, care enough about yourself to make room for it in your life.” ~Jean Shinoda Bolen
As we grow older, a lot of us fall out of love with ourselves, and as a result, have a hard time figuring out what we value and what lights us up.
Self-love is crucial to creating a life that aligns with our desires because it serves as our inner compass, empowering and enabling us to steer our life in a direction that makes us happy. Otherwise, we end up turning …

“Better to do something imperfectly than to do nothing flawlessly.” ~Robert H Schuller
I have tried for so long to build a meditation habit. Seriously, it’s been one of my biggest goals for more than a decade.
And I’ve tried really hard. I’ve read books, I’ve taken classes, I’ve made accountability charts, I’ve set SMART goals; I’ve done it all.
Sometimes, I’ll fall into a good rhythm, and I might make it onto my mat three or four days in a row. Then sometimes, three whole months will go by without me managing to do it at all.
So …
If you could change one thing about your body, what would it be? Fifty people answered that question, and the answers after the two-minute mark really make you think.

“Judgments prevent us from seeing the good that lies beyond appearances.” ~Wayne Dyer
When I first took up meditation, sitting with my thoughts didn’t come naturally. At the time, I was going through a divorce and was often anxious and stressed out. It took months, but I kept trying, and after a while I looked forward to my daily sit.
In my meditation group, I learned a classic method for generating compassion and equanimity. I tried holding images in my mind of a friend, an enemy, and a stranger.
The idea was to view each one without judgment or preference, …

“Stop worrying about pleasing others so much. Do more of what makes you happy.” ~Unknown
There comes a time in everyone’s life when you break away from your family. Right? We are all familiar with this. It happens when you turn eighteen, go off to college, and move out the house—and out of the state or country for some.
This is the expectation of society on the whole. Then what keeps us so bound to our families that we sometimes feel paralyzed, afraid of making the “wrong” decisions for our career, relationships, or simply how we choose to live?
Despite …

“Everyone comes with baggage. Find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack.” ~Unknown
I have suffered varying degrees and types of depression since I was thirteen years old, and over the years I have been on the receiving end of both good and bad support from friends.
Some understood, and some told me to “stop moaning and get over it.” Likewise, I have had friends who have struggled as acutely as I have, and throughout it all I have learned so much about what it means to be (and how to be) a friend to someone who …

“Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.” ~Alexander Pope
Growing up, I had a wonderful relationship with my mother. We did all the usual mother-daughter things together—went shopping, had brunch—and we supported each other when my father left.
In 2011, I was happily pregnant. I felt supported by my family and ready to take on motherhood. My husband and I were elated by the birth of our little boy.
It’s fair to say that I may have been a little naïve about what was to come. I knew it would be hard work, but I …

“You just do it. You force yourself to get up. You force yourself to put one foot before the other, and darn it, you refuse to let it get to you. You fight. You cry. You curse. Then you go about the business of living. That’s how I’ve done it. There’s no other way.” ~Elizabeth Taylor
Most of us will experience hard choices, stressful events, and difficult situations that will impact us in one way or another for the rest of our lives.
Hard times happen. They teach us lessons, make us stronger, and give us a deeper sense of …

“There are times when alone is the best place to be.” ~Unknown
Some people think it’s awful to spend time alone—that it means you’re antisocial or no one needs you.
Some people feel sad and lonely when they don’t have company every evening or weekend.
But being alone doesn’t mean that no one needs you. And it can actually be quite useful to take some time to yourself.
I am almost thirty. This is an age when you start to rethink your whole life, trying to understand what you should change or improve, what you should do next, and …

“Friends are the family we choose for ourselves.” ~Edna Buchanan
A few years ago I ended all contact with my parents, and I have not seen or spoken to them since then.
The truth is I am actually okay with that. Initially, I thought I was going to lose my mind. I had been brought up to believe that family comes first. Children should respect and take care of their parents. Family should—and will—always be there for each other.
Those beliefs were based on love, and I cherished them.
I wanted so much to feel that connection—that unconditional love those …
Soul Pancake loves to infuse joy in the mundane, and their “elevator joy bomb” video is no exception!

“Speak your mind even if your voice shakes.” ~Maggie Kuhn
For years I was that person who needed to know what would happen in the near future. I wasn’t content with being in the moment and letting things unfold naturally because it made me anxious.
Knowing, or at least thinking I knew, was a way for me to relax and reassure myself that nothing was going to unexpectedly pop up. The idea of a problem spontaneously arising made me so nervous and anxious that I’d become a doormat instead of speaking up and saying what I really thought.
For me, …