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Join the Tiny Buddha Twitter Party on Feb 21st: Win Prizes and Tweet for Charity!

Do you remember in December when I threw a Twitter party to celebrate the launch of my book, Tiny Buddha: Simple Wisdom for Life’s Hard Questions?

No? You’re not the only one!

I didn’t spread the word very well, so I’ve decided to do it again, with the help of Karl from Party Biz Connect and my friend Mastin from The Daily Love.

This time the party will support one of my favorite charities; and to make it even more exciting, I’m going to offer the Peace and Purpose Bonus Pack (valued at more than $150) to anyone who purchases …

Tiny Wisdom: The Art of Appreciating What You Get

“Who does not thank for little will not thank for much.” -Estonian Proverb

Recently I’ve felt frustrated because someone I asked to help me has done less than I hoped he would. At first I felt this was unfair, because I’ve been supportive of him. Then I realized I was overlooking what he did do for me while dwelling on what he didn’t.

This made me think of some research I referenced in my book (which I originally found in a book called Sway.)

In a German research study, strangers were “partnered up,” though anonymously and kept in separate …

A Simple Prescription for Natural Healing

“Peace of mind is not the absence of conflict from life but the ability to cope with it.” -Unknown

 

When my daughter, Nava, was critically ill, on a ventilator in a drug-induced coma for three months, one of the ICU doctors called me in after a couple of weeks to tell me that if she survives, it will be a long road.

He started writing out a prescription for an anti-anxiety medication to “help” me through this horrific ordeal.  I certainly don’t fault him here as this was an extreme acute situation and he didn’t know if I could …

Tiny Wisdom: What Love Isn’t

“Love isn’t a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun, like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” –Fred Rogers

Over the years, we form a lot of ideas about what love is, oftentimes based on unrealistic hopes and standards. We learn what we think it’s supposed to look like, and we may find ourselves frustrated when reality falls short.

It often does. Love can be messy, confusing, and imperfect, just like us, and life itself.

What Hallmark cards don’t always tell us …

Reclaiming Valentine’s Day: 4 Real Expressions of Love

“Love is what we were born with. Fear is what we learned here.” ~Marianne Williamson

Valentine’s Day. Yes, that day—the much maligned, much cherished, much hated, and much misunderstood day of the year.

I remember being traumatized in adolescence. Not only were we supposed to, according to peer-reviewed social norms, like people and get liked back on this holiday, my school made us do Valentine’s day card/candy exchanges.

We exchanged, in class, little pre-packaged cards and those infamous heart-shaped candies stamped with subtle expressions like “be mine.”

Do you recall these candy hearts that I’m describing? They come in variety …

Tiny Wisdom: Keep Your Head Clear

“Keep your head clear. It doesn’t matter how bright the path is if your head is always cloudy.” -Unknown

Some days seem to start with a proverbial rain cloud dripping above our beds.

I had one of those days on Sunday. I didn’t sleep well on Friday or Saturday because I have a medical condition that sometimes wakes me in the middle of the night, so I woke up on Sunday feeling irritable and grouchy.

My boyfriend’s voice sounded like nails down a chalkboard. To be clear, I love him dearly, and I also love the sound of birds chirping. …

Every Great Dream Begins with a Dreamer

“Don’t let today’s disappointments cast a shadow on tomorrow’s dreams.” ~Unknown

As a little kid I liked to dream—big, whether it was believing my red-Huffy bicycle would one day turn into a Transformer or convincing myself that as an adult I’d be spending much of my time in Hollywood hosting “The Price is Right.” As I said, I liked to dream big. I still do sometimes.

If we think back to our childhood, we all can remember a time when our dreams didn’t seem that far away from us.

I remember spending countless hours in my basement …

Tiny Wisdom: What Else Could It Be?

“Uncertainty is the only certainty there is, and knowing how to live with insecurity is the only security.” -John Allen Paulos

Sometimes it’s tempting to jump to conclusions that support our worst fears.

Maybe you didn’t hear back from an interviewer yet, so you assume you did something to mess it up.

Or your friend hasn’t responded to an email, so you assume there’s something on her mind that she’s not telling you.

I’ve done this many times before, in large part because I often forget that not everything is about me—that sometimes people are slow to respond because of …

A Small Guide to Big Changes

Tiny Steps

“It is better to take many small steps in the right direction than to make a great leap forward only to stumble backward.” ~Proverb

I recently made a discovery that massively increased the amount of change that I have been able to take on. Good stuff, too, like my eating habits and the amount that I exercise.

By this time last year, and the year before, I would have already dropped my New Year’s resolution. Maybe you have, too.

But there’s still a chance. There’s still time for some big changes this year.

With this small change, I’ve …

Tiny Wisdom: Your Feelings Are Real and Valid

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“Feelings are real and legitimate.” -Unknown

One of the most frustrating things in the world is feeling something painful and having other people tell you that you shouldn’t be upset.

That it’s no big deal that relationship didn’t work out, or that opportunity didn’t pan out—that it’s all in your head, so you should let it go, suck it up, and move on.

A while back, a friend of mine got fired from a new job after her first day. We were out in a group when she got the call, and several of us watched her emotions slowly build …

3 Lies to Eliminate to Start Living Up to Your Potential

Woman holding a star

“And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.” ~Abraham Lincoln

I used to think that I would motivate myself to really live up to my full potential by reminding myself how much I wasn’t.

Well, that didn’t work.

Not that I didn’t get any results from chanting “You are so not living up to your full potential!” while getting out of bed, driving to work, doing the dishes, and combing my hair. Any time was a great time to remind myself. So I didn’t waste a second doing just …

Tiny Wisdom: Happiness Is the Way

“There is no way to happiness, happiness is the way.” -Thich Nhat Hanh

I am writing this from a plane, much like a post I wrote last week. I’ve come to believe some of life’s most joyful moments happen when we least expected they would.

Just now one of the flight attendants came onto the loud speaker to announce there’s someone with a birthday today. After many of us sang to a man we couldn’t see, one guy yelled “Stand up!” and another hollered, “Speech!” And then we all started giggling, somehow conveying a Boston accent without uttering a …

Releasing the Urge to Push and Being Kind to Yourself Instead

“Slow down and everything you are chasing will come around and catch you.” ~John De Paola

Pushing has always been the way I get things done.

Actually, I should be more specific: pushing myself harder has been the way I get things done.

I grew up believing that life was hard, and that the only way to survive was to give up indulgences, buckle down, and trudge forward. Uphill. Against the wind.

In my small, suburban high school, I spent hours after my classes ended wrestling with quadratic equations.

I had the overwhelmingly generous help of my teachers, who tutored …

Tiny Wisdom: What Are You Passionate About?

“Enthusiasm is contagious. You can start an epidemic.” –Unknown

Do you ever downplay your passions and ambitions when someone asks you about your work?

Someone asked me if I do this a while back, and at first, I said that I don’t. To know me is to know Tiny Buddha—and to hear about it often.

I’ve recognized, however, that I can be somewhat reserved in describing what I do when I first someone new—especially if I meet them in a context that does not confirm they have an interest in personal development.

Of course, this means I’m making assumptions. Just …

Why Too Much Choice is Stressful and 7 Simple Ways to Limit It

“Every day brings a choice: to practice stress or to practice peace.” ~Joan Borysenko

When I bought my car, I visited only one showroom. I’d made the decision that this was the car for me in around one hour, and chose not to spend more hours or days of my time going from one place to another to check other deals and different cars.

If I hadn’t have found this car, I would have gone to another dealer. However, I’ll never know if I could have saved money by haggling elsewhere, and I don’t care.

I’ve had my trusty and …

Tiny Wisdom: Life May Never Be Simple

“The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem.” -Theodore I. Rubin

There are times when things get complicated and it has nothing to do with the choices we’ve made.

Sometimes everyone around us needs us for different things, right as our work is becoming more challenging, and we’re feeling confused about what we actually want to do with our lives.

Sometimes we receive medical or psychiatric diagnoses—and possibly both at the same time—right after being laid off and losing our health insurance.

Sometimes we feel we’ve made …

Will You Get Bitter or Better?

“Instead of complaining that the rose bush is full of thorns, be happy the thorn bush has roses.” ~Proverb

I am a member of a mercifully small subset of society. I am the mother of a dead child.

Twenty years ago, my daughter Grace—my first child, my only girl—was born prematurely and died 32-minutes later. As I write this, I am astonished that it has been twenty years since I met my daughter for the only time.

Time stopped for me when Grace took her last little breath. And I was certain that my life could never start again. 

I …

Tiny Wisdom: Plant Tiny Seeds for Joy

“The grass is always greener where you water it.” –Unknown

The first time I heard the phrase “the grass is always greener on the other side,” I was 12 years old—and I heard it in song.

I didn’t know at the time that this was from the play Woman of the Year, because two women in my theater group sang it as part of a musical review. Still, it made a deep impression on me.

One of the characters is a housewife, and the other is a famous TV news personality—and yet they both feel certain they’re missing out …

Stop Focusing on Lack to Fully Enjoy Your Experiences

“Not what we have but what we enjoy constitutes our abundance.” ~Epicurus

Yoga retreats in rural getaways nestled in tropical mountain spaces. Exploration trips for pleasure and business on the east and west coasts. Bike riding and people watching on Santa Monica Boulevard.

Recognition and sponsorship from leaders in my professional circle. Adventures with my husband and daughters in Jamaica.

Even with all these rich life experiences, still my focus was always the same: If I could just have more money, my life could finally get good.

The past year found me deep on a journey to discover the muted …

Tiny Wisdom: Challenging the Fear of Criticism

“The final proof of greatness lies in being able to endure criticism without resentment.” -Elbert Hubbard

Sometimes criticism can feel like a ticking bomb that needs to be disposed.

Case in point: I receive emails about every comment left on the site. While I’ll glance at them peripherally to be sure they’re not spam that made it through the filter, I generally let them accumulate so I can respond to many all at once.

But sometimes, I’ll notice a harsh criticism, and suddenly feel this need to respond to it right now.

I’m not sure if it’s because I …