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Posts tagged with “depression”

Beyond the Inner Critic: Choosing a New Reality

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“To think new thoughts, you have to break the bones in your head.” ~Jean-Paul Sartre

Respectfully, Mr. Sartre, I disagree. This is that story, and it’s not for the faint of heart.

Today Was a Bad Day

Oh no, not again!

The walls were closing in on me, and I could see their faces all flustered and red.

Why are they yelling at me? I mean, are they yelling at me?

I could feel the tension in the room; I just couldn’t hear anything. Well, actually, yeah, I could.

I could hear her.

I could hear Annabelle.

I knew it …

4 Ways to Help Someone with Mental Health Challenges

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“Just being there for someone can sometimes bring hope when all seems hopeless.” ~Dave G. Llewellyn

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where someone told you something deeply personal and traumatic and you were stuck on what to say to them, how to act, and how to behave?

This happens to me regularly, and it’s not that I don’t have feelings or emotions about what’s happened to the person. I feel deeply sorry for them. But I sometimes freeze and don’t know what to say or do.

When it comes to mental health issues, this can be even …

How to Feel More in Control in Life in Four Steps

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“You may not be able to control every situation and its outcome, but you can control how you deal with it.” ~Unknown

Life is often crazy and rushed. Sometimes it’s difficult to feel a sense of control. It can be utterly chaotic and leave us feeling lost.

This is exactly where I was two years ago. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. I felt hopeless, directionless, and completely lost pretty much every day.

I didn’t feel like I had a grip on anything in my life, including my thoughts, emotions, and actions.

I had …

Please Don’t Tell a Depressed Person…

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A Little Hope and Encouragement for Hard Times

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“If your path demands you to walk through hell, walk as though you own the place.” ~Unknown

Trigger warning: This content contains references to self-harm and suicide.

It was in the spring semester during graduate school. I was living alone in a one-bedroom apartment and working nearly full-time hours at night.

The anti-depressants weren’t working so well. I was keeping up with my therapist, but I suppose it was too much.

I felt too much. It hurt so much and couldn’t handle it. You could list out the symptoms of depression, and I had them all.

Unable to deal with …

You Reach Out

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Depression Isn’t Always Dark Rooms and Crying Endlessly

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7 Pillars of Mental Health: How to Feel Your Best (Almost) Every Day

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“Sending love to everyone who’s doing their best to heal from things they don’t discuss.” ~Unknown

When I was twelve years old, I planned on taking my own life. I had a plan, I had the means, and I thought about it every single day for months. No one was aware—not my family, not my best friends, not my teachers at school or my peers. It would have been a huge surprise in my community had I attempted it, because I didn’t appear as someone who was severely depressed.

Thankfully, I never acted on it, and fifteen years later I …

Stop Catastrophizing: How to Retrain Your Brain to Stress and Worry Less

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“Don’t believe everything you think.” ~Unknown

A couple years ago, I entered a depressive state as I sat through many long, eventless days while on partial disability due to a bilateral hand injury. I was working one to two hours a day max in my job, per doctor’s orders. The medical experts couldn’t say if or when I would feel better.

As I sat in pain on my sofa, day after day, running out of new TV series to occupy my time, I couldn’t help but catastrophize my future

What’ll happen if I can’t use the computer again? My whole …

3 Things to Do if You’re Wondering: Why Can’t I Just Be Happy?

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Do you sometimes see people running around enjoying life and wonder what you’re missing? Sometimes I used to think I must be a horrible person. I had so many things going for me, and I still couldn’t be happy. I would ask myself, is there something wrong with me? Am I a narcissist?

Then sometimes I would decide I was just going to be happy. I would fake it until I made it and just accept that’s who I was. But it wouldn’t take long for me to feel overwhelmingly depressed.

I had a little dark hole that would …

Anxiety Sucks, But It Taught Me These 7 Important Things

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“Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom.” ~Soren Kierkegaard

Let’s be clear:

This isn’t an article about positive thinking.

This isn’t an article about how silver linings make everything okay.

This isn’t an article about how your perspective on anxiety is all wrong.

The kids call those things “toxic positivity.”

No toxic positivity here.

This is an article about my lifelong relationship with anxiety and what I’ve learned from something that won’t go away. At times the anxiety spikes and feels almost crippling. I have a hard time appreciating the learning at those times, but it’s still there.

That is what …

How I’ve Navigated My Grief and Guilt Since Losing My Narcissistic Father

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“One of the greatest awakenings comes when you realize that not everybody changes.  Some people never change.  And that’s their journey.  It’s not yours to try and fix it for them.” ~Unknown

In 2021 my father died. Cancer of… so many things.

Most of the events during that time are a blur, but the emotions that came with them are vivid and unrelenting.

I was the first in my family to find out.

My mother and sister had gone on an off-grid week-long getaway up the West Coast of South Africa, where there’s nothing …

How I Claimed My Right to Belong While Dealing with Imposter Syndrome

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TRIGGER WARNING: This post briefly references sexual abuse.

“Never hold yourself back from trying something new just because you’re afraid you won’t be good enough. You’ll never get the opportunity to do your best work if you’re not willing to first do your worst and then let yourself learn and grow.” ~Lori Deschene

The year 2022 was the hardest of my life. And I survived a brain tumor before that.

My thirtieth year started off innocently enough. I was living with my then-boyfriend in Long Beach and had a nice ring on my finger. The relationship had developed quickly, but …

Thinner is Not Better – Healthy, Connected, and Happy Is

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“Standards of beauty are arbitrary. Body shame exists only to the extent that our physiques don’t match our own beliefs about how we should look.” ~Martha Beck

I have so many women around me right now—friends, mothers, clients that are on a diet—constantly talking about their weight and how their bodies look, struggling with body image.

I am profoundly sad about the frequency and theme of those discussions.

At the same time, I deeply get it; it is hard to detach from our conditioning.

I too struggled with body image at one point in my life, and for a very …

Why Life Felt Hard for Me for Years (and 7 Lessons That Have Helped)

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“You’re so hard on yourself. But remember, everybody has a chapter they don’t read out loud. Take a moment. Sit back. Marvel at your life; at the mistakes that gave you wisdom, at the suffering that gave you strength. Despite everything, you still move forward, be proud of this. Continue to endure. Continue to persevere. And remember, no matter how dark it gets, the sun will rise again.” ~Unknown

All my life I knew I was different. If I didn’t look so much like my mom, I would have believed the jokes my brother told me about how I was …

How I Feel the Best I Can Despite My Struggles with Depression and Anxiety

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“There is hope, even when your brain tells you there isn’t.” ~John Green

I remember being fifteen. I was a high school freshman who loved drawing, books, Harry Potter, and Taylor Swift. I hated math class with a passion. I had a loving family and a small white dog named Maddie. I wanted to be a writer, and to have a boyfriend. I also wanted to die.

It started in seventh grade, when my best friend, Meghan, dumped me. You hear about romantic breakups all the time, but no one seems to talk about friendship breakups. They hurt a …

How Yoga Helped Heal My Anxiety and Quiet My Overactive Mind

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“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you really are” ~Carl Jung

Yoga is often celebrated for its physical benefits: greater flexibility, increased strength, improved circulation, and so on. But nothing could have prepared me for the transformational effect that yoga has had on my mental health and well-being.

I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression when I was fourteen, and I have struggled with both for most of my life. My mind was my worst enemy, constantly worrying and criticizing to the point where it became hard to do anything. Even the things I really wanted to …

Abandonment Wounds: How to Heal Them and Feel More at Ease in Relationships

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“I always wondered why it was so easy for people to leave. What I should have questioned was why I wanted so badly for them to stay.” ~Samantha King

Do you feel afraid to speak your truth or ask for what you want?

Do you tend to neglect your needs and people-please?

Do you have a hard time being alone?

Have you ever felt panic and/or anxiety when someone significant to you left your life or you felt like they were going to?

If so, please don’t blame yourself for being this way. Most likely it’s coming from an …

Change Made Easy: How to Get Unstuck by Doing What You’re Already Doing

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“Don’t wait for your feelings to change to take action. Take action and your feelings will change.” ~Barbara Baron

You are stuck because you are waiting to want to do the things you know you need to do to get better. You aren’t doing the things you know you need to do because you don’t want to feel bad, but you already feel bad. You are already doing what you don’t want to do. Why not choose to do something that you don’t want to do that will actually move you forward?

If you are waiting to want to do …

7 False Beliefs That Will Keep You Trapped in Your Head Forever

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“There is only one cause of unhappiness: the false beliefs you have in your head, beliefs so widespread, so commonly held, that it never occurs to you to question them.” ~Anthony de Mello

When people come to me suffering from anxiety, fear, anger, self-judgment etc., there are five things they invariably believe to be true.

Let’s take anxiety as an example. Most (if not all) people with anxiety believe that:

1. It’s bad or wrong to feel anxious.
2. It shouldn’t be there.
3. There’s something wrong with me (for being anxious).
4. My mind should be peaceful.
5. I …