Menu

Posts tagged with “Mindfulness”

Why It’s Worth the Temporary Discomfort of Sitting with Intense Emotions

By

“Whatever you’re feeling, it will eventually pass.”  ~Lori Deschene

Can you feel an intense emotion, like anger, without acting on it, reacting to it, or trying to get rid of it?

Can you feel such an intense emotion without needing to justify or explain it—or needing to find someone or something to blame it on?

After successfully dodging it for two years, I recently caught Covid-19. The physical symptoms were utter misery. But something much more interesting happened while I was unwell.

The whole experience brought some intense emotions to the surface. Namely, seething anger about something that had …

Why I Broke Down Mentally While Striving for Work/Life Balance

By

“Maybe it’s time for the fighter to be fought for, the holder to be held, and the lover to be loved.” ~Unknown

I was breastfeeding my infant son when he bit me. That bite set the stage for a deeper unraveling then I could have ever imagined.

I unlatched him, handed him to my husband, and got in my car. As I was driving I began to lose the feeling in my hands and feet. My vision started to blur, and my breathing was fast and shallow. I was terrified I was not going to make it back home. …

Free Thich Nhat Hanh Audio Series: Living Without Stress or Fear

By

When you think of the teachers who’ve had the greatest impact on your life, who comes to mind?

For me, it’s the calm, the humble, the patient—the people who not only imparted useful life lessons but also embodied their message with their grace and equanimity. People I was fortunate enough to know personally, like my grandmother, and others I never met that brought me clarity and peace from afar, like the inimitable Thich Nhat Hanh.

Thay, as his students called him, was a Vietnamese Zen monk, author, poet, peacemaker, and founder of the “engaged Buddhism” movement—the act of leveraging our …

How Befriending My Anxiety and Depression Helped Ease My Pain

By

“‘What should I do?’ I asked myself. ‘Spend another two miserable years like this? Or should I truly welcome my panic?’ I decided to really let go of wanting to block, get rid of, or fight it. I would finally learn how to live with it, and to use it as support for my meditation and awareness. I welcomed it for real. What began to happen was that the panic was suspended in awareness. On the surface level was panic, but beneath it was awareness, holding it. This is because the vital first step to breaking the cycle of the …

How I’m Honoring My Values Even Though I Have Conflicting Priorities

By

“No matter what kind of stuff you tell the world, or tell yourself, your actions reveal your real values. Your actions show you what you actually want.” ~Derek Sivers

I need to be a productivity rockstar if I stand a chance of accomplishing everything important to me.

There’s a book I want to write, a course I want to create, and a chance to work with an award-winning author that has given me endless projects I want to pursue.

These are exciting, but they’re creating a ton of anxiety in my life.

Why?

Because they’re at odds with being the …

How to Mindfully Temper Road Rage and Make Driving Less Stressful

By

“Smile, breathe, and go slowly.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

As a Lyft driver, I once spent significant time out on the road—a setting rife with provocations and stressors.

Driving can feel like a constant challenge to employ mindfulness instead of giving way to destructive emotions like impatience and frustration. Meditation can be difficult to practice when you’re navigating a vehicle (demanding as both activities are of your full attention)—try channeling all your senses into it, and you’ll likely plow over a pedestrian or end with your car in a ditch.

Navigating the road mindfully, though, doesn’t have to mean closing your …

The Difference Between Easy and Hard Self-Care and Why Both Matter

By

“Sometimes you’ve got to look straight into the tired eyes of the woman staring back at you in the mirror and tell her that she deserves the best kind of love, the best kind of life, and devote yourself to giving it to her all over again.” ~S.C. Lourie

Self-care. An important concept that has become a buzzword. What does it mean? The answer… that depends on you. Google and you will find lists, articles, and suggestions for self-care tasks. These can be helpful as inspiration, but self-care is something that’s unique to you.

I work in suicide prevention and …

Alone Doesn’t Have to Mean Lonely: How to Be Happy by Yourself

By

“Sometimes, you need to be alone. Not to be lonely, but to enjoy your free time being yourself.” ~Unknown

First, let’s be clear, being alone is different than feeling lonely. The feeling of loneliness can arise even if you are not alone, or you can be alone and not feel lonely. It all comes down to the meaning your mind creates at that moment in time.

In my twenties being alone was something so triggering that I would find any distractions I could come up with to avoid it: partying, unhealthy relationships, constantly being on the go and busy… …

How Our Self-Talk and Language Can Sabotage or Support Us

By

“Today I want you to think about all that you are instead of all that you are not.” ~Unknown

“Love the pinecones!”

This was a comment from a friend on one of my Facebook photos from a beautiful seaside hike filled with wildflowers and other natural wonders.

When I responded with “It was a puzzle figuring out how to best photograph them” (not what I originally planned to write), she wrote, “Gregg, that’s such a fun part, isn’t it?” That comment was the brightening of a bulb that had already been going off in my head. It led to deeper …

How I Stopped Feeling Sorry for Myself and Shifted from Victim to Survivor

By

“When we deny our stories, they define us. When we own our stories, we get to write a brave new ending.” ~Brené Brown

There was a time when I felt really sorry for myself. I had good reason to be. My life had been grim. There had been so much tragedy in my life from a young age. I had lost all my grandparents young, lived in a home with alcoholism and domestic abuse, and to top it all off, my dad killed himself.

I could write you a long list of how life did me wrong. I threw myself …

Feeling Burnt Out? How to Slow Down and Reclaim Your Peace

By

“Burnout is a sign that something needs to change.” ~Sarah Forgrave

Fifteen years ago, my doctor informed me I was in the early stages of adrenal exhaustion. In no uncertain terms, she warned that if I failed to address the stress I was under, my adrenals might not recover. This was hard to hear, but it forced me to face the fact that eating well, exercising religiously, and keeping up with the latest research on wellness was not enough.

I had to ask myself a defining question that day: Am I ready to go down with the ship?

At the …

Why It’s So Hard to Just Rest and Why We Need to Do It

By

“If you don’t give your mind and body a break, you’ll break. Stop pushing yourself through pain and exhaustion and take care of your needs.” ~Lori Deschene

In November of 2021, my autoimmune issues flared up. My doctor and I are still unsure which of my conditions—rheumatoid arthritis or fibromyalgia—was the culprit, or if they were acting in cahoots, but the overall achiness and debilitating fatigue were a solid indication that something was more active than usual.

I woke up tired, needed naps, and often ran out of spoons—a phrase familiar to many with chronic conditions, based on a gorgeous …

What Is Stress-Induced Illness? How Trauma Can Cause Physical Pain

By

“Wisdom is merely the movement from fighting life to embracing it.” ~Rasheed Ogunlaru

Three years ago, I fell into the blind spot of medicine: America’s unknown epidemic.

After numerous tests, scans, scopes, and too many doctors to count, modern medicine could not find anything seriously wrong with me. I also consented to have my gallbladder removed. My first and only surgery at age forty, an “experiment” of sorts.

Six months into the worst nightmare of my life, my spiraling health started to take a huge toll on me physically, mentally, and emotionally. I didn’t want to live anymore, but …

Mindfulness, Creativity, and Nature: A Healing Trifecta for Lasting Peace

By

“It is the marriage of the soul with nature that gives birth to imagination.” ~Henry David Thoreau

Before my accident, before we had kids, after we divorced, after my father died from Covid, before the pandemic…

We tend to divide our lives into the before and afters that define our world, whether personally or on a grand scale. These divisions offer context, providing a kind of roadmap that supports us in reflecting on the beauty and darkness, the decisions we made, and who we might be if certain things had never occurred.

I have always believed that the only reason …

Feeling Weighed Down by Regret? What Helps Me Let Go

By

“Be kind to past versions of yourself that didn’t know the things you know now.” ~Unknown

When I taught yoga classes in jails in Colorado and New Jersey, I would end class with the Metta Meditation:

May we all feel forgiveness.

May we all feel happiness.

May we all feel loved.

May all our sufferings be healed.

May we feel at peace.

The women, all clothed in light gray sweatpants, would be in a relaxed yoga posture, usually lying on their yoga mat with their legs up the wall. The fluorescent lights would be full blast, as they always are …

How Mindfulness Helped Me Become My Own Best Friend

By

“With mindfulness, you can establish yourself in the present in order to touch the wonders of life that are available in that moment.”  ~Thich Nhat Hanh

I am not a good friend to myself. This realization shook me as I was riding the bus home one day from the local university where I taught.

This realization had been building for some time, but it struck me powerfully that day. I was teaching a summer class on Asian philosophy, and we were reading the Sayings of Buddha. We had been discussing a passage about a monk watching his feelings.

The passage …

The Science of Happiness: 9 Feel-Good Tools to Boost Your Mood

By

“Remember, being happy doesn’t mean you have it all. It simply means you’re thankful for all you have.” ~Unknown

I remember sitting on the New York City subway, tears streaming down my face, armed with valium and lithium along with other antidepressants that my psych had just prescribed.

I was desperate, in that cave I had come to know as depression. Dark, hopeless, fearful depression. The cold metal seat of the subway made me feel raw and exposed. I couldn’t function. I couldn’t stop crying. I was panicked that I would be like this forever.

That was an example of …

4 Ways to Save Your Sanity When Life Gets Hard and Overwhelming

By

“You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.” ~Jon Kabat Zinn

In December of 2020, we noticed Mom’s speech seemed difficult. Like she had stuffed cotton balls in her mouth, and someone was restraining her jaw from moving. We asked her about it, she said it was nothing.

We hadn’t seen each other since we got together over the holidays. On New Year’s Day 2020, we clinked glasses filled with sparkling wine and shared bold predictions about how this was going to be our best year yet (spoiler alert, it wasn’t).

With every passing week and conversation, …

How One Fleeting Mindful Minute Completely Changed My Life

By

“Don’t believe everything you think.” ~Unknown

I am a self-confessed overthinker. I could spend hours thinking and going down the rabbit hole in my mind trying to find answers to all sorts of situations.

About ten years ago, I struggled with burnout. I was a nurse for about twenty-two years. All I knew was nursing, and I was defined by it. As they say, “A nurse is always a nurse.”

This makes leaving nursing something hard to do, even when it’s unhealthy.

I’ve always worked in high-stress areas like intensive care and trauma emergency rooms, but burnout made it …

How Overthinking Ruined my Relationships and How I Overcame It

By

“Overthinking ruins you. It ruins the situation. And it twists things around. It makes you worry. Plus, it just makes everything worse than it actually is.” ~Karen Salmansohn

I grew up with parents who believed a kid shouldn’t have friends and should be indoors always. Because of that, I never had real friends in my childhood, except those I met in school and church.

Since my early teenage years, loneliness has been my forte, and I have learned to pay too much attention to details. When people talk, I look at them, how they react, their facial expressions, etc. I …