When You Connect with People Who Are Good for You
Maybe It’s Not All Good or All Bad
“You are the sky. Everything else—it’s just the weather.” ~Pema Chödrön
A farmer has a horse for many years; it helps him earn his livelihood and raise his son. One day, the horse runs away. His neighbor says sympathetically, “Such bad luck.”
The farmer replies, “Maybe. Who knows?”
The next day, the horse makes its way back home bringing with it another horse. The neighbor says with a smile, “Such good luck.”
The farmer replies, “Maybe. Who knows?”
The following day, the farmer’s son rides the new horse and seeks to tame it. In the process, he breaks his leg. …
How to Be Less Anxious About Things You Can’t Change
“One of the happiest moments is when you find the courage to let go of what you can’t change.” ~Unknown
Over the last few years, I’ve had to deal with a frustrating problem.
It’s something that’s not uncommon, but it can be debilitating, and it has affected me every day. Some days have been incredibly tough, and they’ve tested my tolerance and my patience.
The problem is chronic back pain.
Every day I get up, knowing that throughout the day I’m going to have a discomfort that could oscillate between a mild annoyance and an intense burning. At some point, …
Why I Won’t Let the Fear of Failure Hold Me Back
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal; it is the courage to continue that counts.” ~Winston Churchill
I am scared of sharks. Often when I’m floating in the ocean on my surfboard, amazed at the vastness before me and my relative smallness in the world, my mind drifts toward what may be lurking below.
I know that I am more likely to get injured during the car ride to the beach or get struck by lightning when I get there than be attacked by a shark. I also know that, according to the US Consumer Product Safety Commission …
How Micro Habits Can Help You Reach Big Goals
“A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” ~Lao Tzu
Many of us have big, grand goals for our lives.
These goals can be tied to our work, or maybe starting a family, or ideals for a new home with that family, or travel to an exotic location we’ve long dreamed about, or pretty much anything else. Oftentimes these goals can seem a very long way from where we are presently in our lives. In fact, sometimes they can seem so far away that they appear to be totally out of reach.
As a consequence, too …
The Shy Person’s Guide to Making Your Dreams a Reality
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.” ~Marianne Williamson
Light poured into the studio. We sat in a circle on the hardwood floor. We did some deep breathing and then the facilitator asked us to think about what we really wanted and didn’t have yet. She instructed us to speak it out loud in the present tense, as if it were already happening.
I was at a co-working space in downtown Toronto, and this was the daily opening where we set our intentions for the day and sometimes …
When You Reframe Your Breakup as an Opportunity, Everything Changes
“Sometimes the most uncomfortable learning is the most powerful.” ~Brené Brown
Seems impossible, doesn’t it?
How can you look at your breakup as an opportunity when it feels like someone cut your right arm off and ripped out your heart?
Breakups can be rough. When you open yourself up to another person, love them unconditionally, and compromise your own needs for the “betterment of the relationship,” you put yourself all-in. It’s no surprise that you feel lost, confused, and unwilling to move on when that connection is torn away from you. You gave everything to your relationship and now it’s …
What to Do If You Feel Trapped by Your Circumstances
“As long as we know we’re trapped, we still have a chance to escape.” ~Sara Grant
Talking to someone last week who had to ‘volunteer’ to return to their country of birth, a country defined by the United Nations as one of the least developed in the world in terms of its economic conditions, was humbling.
While I often find myself feeling trapped by the longevity, monotony, and intensity involved in child rearing, I wasn’t sure what I could say that might help someone who had been the victim of identity theft and, through lack of resources, had no option …
What If You Were Suddenly Forgiven?
“Forgiveness is not always easy. At times, it feels more painful than the wound we suffered, to forgive the one that inflicted it. And yet, there is no peace without forgiveness.” ~Marianne Williamson
Twenty-seven years ago I made a terrible mistake that led to losing the friendship of someone important to me. I was twelve and I very vividly remember that I was at her front door, asking for her forgiveness and she was telling me she couldn’t do this.
Friendship is one of those areas of my life that I have always felt I need to work on. I …
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