You’re Not Too Old and It’s Not Too Late
The People Who Hurt Us Are Vehicles for Our Growth
“You only see in others what you have in yourself.” ~Annette Noontil
I now recognize, after observing painful patterns repeat many times, how things that trigger me are just lessons I need to learn that are often delivered through other people. The more painful the experience, the more I can see (in retrospect) I learned from it.
Every now and then, when I find myself getting sucked into thoughts about the rightness or wrongness of a situation and how much pain it’s causing me, I take a step backward. I can see that people are just the mechanism to my …
You Can Have a Tender Heart and Still Be Fierce
“Life is a balance between what we can control and what we cannot. I am learning to live between effort and surrender.” ~Danielle Orner
For too long, I felt myself pulled between two shores of my identity. On one side was my yoga teacher, meditator, healer identity—my tender side. On the other side was my activist, change-maker role—my fierce side.
I always felt like I was too tender for some and too fierce for others. It made me feel like I didn’t fit in anywhere.
Definitely the soft-hearted “woo” person in my activist circles. And I was definitely the …
The Life-Changing Benefits of Two-Minute Meditations
“Smile, breathe, and go slowly.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh
I felt everything, from my lower back pain flaring up to tightness in my jaw where I clinch and carry my stress. With my eyes still closed, I rolled my shoulders and repositioned the pillow under my butt. Five minutes had passed, and I had no idea how I would ever make it to forty.
I opened my left eye to see if anyone around me was fidgeting as well and saw rows of people sitting in perfect, cross-legged lotus position with straight necks and relaxed jaws next to me.
Our teacher, …
Living with Depression and Anxiety: How to Lessen the Pain
“I am bent, but not broken. I am scarred, but not disfigured. I am sad, but not hopeless. I am tired, but not powerless. I am angry, but not bitter. I am depressed, but not giving up.” ~Unknown
Depression and anxiety. Two words we hear often, but unless we have actually lived with them, we cannot come close to understanding the tremendous impact they can have on one’s quality of life.
Depression and anxiety can make people feel as if they are worthless and better off dead. What a horrible plague. But it is 100% possible to tame these two …
Maybe I Don’t Need to Make a Big Change in the World
“Be the change you wish to see in the world.” ~Mahatma Gandhi
As a teen, I was passionately idealistic about justice, love, and compassion. Reading the words of Martin Luther King, Jr., Mahatma Gandhi, Mother Teresa, and other icons of justice inspired a desire to make a big change in the world.
Older people would attempt to temper my enthusiasm with a dose of jaded reality, saying things like, “That’s just the way the world is,” and “You can’t change people.”
I vowed to never be like that. I didn’t want to give into the status quo and turn …
6 Ways Meditation Improves Your Life
“Letting go gives us freedom, and freedom is the only condition for happiness. If, in our hearts, we still cling to anything—anger, anxiety, or possessions—we cannot be free.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh
Back in 2001, I was a freshman in college, and my saving grace from anxiety was a yoga class. More specifically, it was the most glorious of poses we call savasana that kept me sane.
For those unfamiliar, savasana—or corpse pose—is a pose of surrender and noticing thoughts and sensations without judgment, much like meditation. (It’s the pose that looks like everyone is just lying around napping.)
Back then, …
When You Feel Tired of Hoping and Trying, Remember…
“What happens when people open their hearts? They get better.” ~Haruki Murakami
What do you do when just can’t do it anymore? When the pain is too much? The discouragement is too much? The hoping and trying are too much?
It’s not that you haven’t tried. You’ve been brave. You’ve been persistent. You’ve been soldiering on through hurt that other people don’t understand.
It’s that you’re feeling broken from the trying.
That’s how I felt when my husband died of stomach cancer. There were two healing realizations that changed not only the path that I was on, but …
When You Start Thinking That You’re Not Good Enough…
“You are strong when you know your weaknesses. You are beautiful when you appreciate your flaws. You are wise when you learn from your mistakes.” ~Unknown
The most annoying thing for me is to hear someone tell me, “Just stop it!” whenever I am frustrated or discouraged and looking for answers and solutions.
When you’re anxious, and someone tells you, “Stop worrying, it will all be fine…” these words only add fuel to the fire and often make you angry. At least this is true for me.
It reminds me of a funny video I watched about a “unique” …
What If Everyone Were Conspiring to Help You?
“The sage perspective accepts every outcome and circumstance as an opportunity.” ~Shirzad Chamine
No doubt you’re familiar with paranoia. In the modern world, it’s hard not to be. And as Joseph Heller wrote, just because you’re paranoid, it doesn’t mean they’re not after you. But there is another way to look at the world. What if you could see every situation in your life as a positive conspiracy, aimed at aligning you with your highest good?
This might seem outlandish, but it’s not as crazy as it seems. If you imagined that the person annoying or challenging you was …
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Why I’m Done Fishing for ‘Likes’ on Social Media
“There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.” ~Ernest Hemingway
Recently I was invited to listen to a recorded presentation about humility, and it literally rocked my world.
As I listened intently, the words “complete and whole” popped into my head. And then came the light bulb moment: “Yes!” I thought. “When one feels whole and complete, they’re more humble.”
As the presenter talked about the “look at me” culture of selfies and social media I felt my toes begin to curl and my stomach tighten.
“Oh …