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Meditating

Stop Trying So Hard and 4 Other Lessons from a Year of Silence

“Freedom is instantaneous the moment we accept things as they are.” ~Karen Maezen Miller

Four years ago I spent the better part of a year being silent.

A friend had told me that in silence, the bits of you that need healing heal themselves. He was talking about the bits of me that had pushed me until I was sick and depressed, too anxious to answer the door.… Read More

Arms Up

Create Something Beautiful with Your Disappointment

“We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose finite hope.” ~Martin Luther King Jr.

“You have to get out the whining,” my writing teacher told me, peering over a section of manuscript that dripped with self-loathing and pity. I swear I watched the words “Barren, empty, hollow shell…” fall flat to the floor and make the saddest plopping noise.… Read More

Deep Thought

When Things Don’t Go As Planned: Transform Disappointment into Action

“A man’s errors are his portals of discovery.” ~James Joyce

I’ve had a bit of experience with disappointment. I got very motivated to change my relationship with it when I was in my twenties and starting my acupuncture practice.

I knew it would take time to build my client base; what I didn’t realize, or more likely was in denial about, was that a very effective way of doing that was by arranging public speaking gigs.… Read More

Sitting in the sun

When You’re Hard on Yourself: Replace Guilt with Self-Compassion

“Be gentle with yourself if you wish to be gentle with others.” ~Lama Yeshe

“Guilty,” admits an offender. “Guilty,” proclaims a jury. Things are pretty black and white in trial verdicts and courtroom pleas (although there are still plea bargains and hung juries, mitigating circumstances and appeals).

Life is rarely as cut-and-dried as the criminal justice system.… Read More

sad face

Developing Self-Compassion When You Don’t Think You’re Enough

“He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.” ~Lao Tzu

I’m at war with enoughness.

My stomach isn’t flat enough; I’m not extroverted enough; I don’t have enough money in my wallet; I’m not creative enough; I’m not getting enough work done.

There are times when the Jaws of Life cannot free me from my expectations and negative self-talk.Read More

Lonely Girl

The Greatest Lesson We Learn When Someone Is Unkind

“I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind.” ~Khalil Gibran

I recently travelled to Malaysia for a friend’s wedding where I spent four delicious days communing with wild monkeys and feasting on sticky rice. The people were kind and warm, the culture rich, the trip magical.… Read More

Sitting Together

How to Help Others Without Compromising Yourself

“The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own.” ~Benjamin Disraeli

When I entered into a relationship with my ex-boyfriend four years ago, I felt I had found a kindred spirit. We met at a meditation retreat where we both volunteered in the kitchen.… Read More

At Ease

A Simple but Powerful Way to Kick the Worry Habit

“Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow.” ~Swedish proverb

I’m a worrier by nature, and I come by it honestly.

My mother was afraid to cross bridges, and ride in elevators, boats, and airplanes. Her mother died of cancer at the age of 40, and my mother spent many years—including those of my childhood—thinking every sniffle, fever, or headache might be the start of something fatal.… Read More

Rainy Day

9 Insights on Dealing with Change, Challenges, and Pain

“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.” ~Alan Watts

This year has been one of unprecedented change for me. From January to March, I traveled to Mozambique, Africa to do volunteer work. I did not speak the language; I did not understand the culture.… Read More

friends

Letting Go of Stubbornness: Appreciate Your Loved Ones While You Can

“Before someone’s tomorrow has been taken away, cherish those you love, appreciate them today. “ ~Michelle C. Ustaszeski

My brother Greg and I were the closest of friends growing up, even if you weigh in the occasional tiff or disagreement we sometimes had.

We discovered our favorite toys together as kids, rode bikes side by side, and conquered video games as a two-man team.… Read More

Friends

7 Ways to Form Deep, Meaningful Friendships

“To have a friend and be a friend is what makes life worthwhile.” ~Unknown

I am fascinated by friendships.

Not the acquaintances you see occasionally or the Facebook friends who wouldn’t recognize you on the street.

I’m talking about your real people. The people who know and love the deepest parts of you.… Read More

Hiding

Why Resistance Isn’t a Bad Thing and What to Do About It

“Worry looks around, fear looks back, faith looks up, guilt looks down, but I look forward.” ~Unknown

I moved houses a couple of weeks ago. It was the perfect opportunity to take a break, pause and reflect, and decide on the directions I wanted my small business to take.

And I did just that: I rested, took the time to think and get über clear about what I wanted to do next and how, revamped my offerings, made a super duper inspiring goal list and… decided that getting to know our neighbors’ cats was far more fascinating than, you know, work.… Read More

Time

4 Ways to Embrace Slow Change When You’re Feeling Impatient

“Change is not a process for the impatient.” ~Barbara Reinhold

I love it when change happens quickly. Sometimes things just click, and everything shifts all at once.

When I met the man who’d become my husband, we were married only thirteen months later, and in those thirteen months we both transformed to our very cores.… Read More

Orange Sky

Evidence That You Are Well and Always Will Be

“On a deeper level you are already complete. When you realize that, there is a playful, joyous energy behind what you do” ~Eckhart Tolle

I was recently speaking with a friend about what it feels like to connect with your underlying, always-there state of well-being. I attempted to describe the indescribable—the feeling underneath the mental chatter that is who you truly are.… Read More

Walk Away

Finding the Courage to Let Go of the Familiar and Make a Change

“Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.” ~Raymond Lindquist

I’ve been processing my beliefs on courage since I turned 31.

When I was in my 20s and teens, my idea of courage was that you fight until the death, never give up, be the one to say the last word, and always, always prove your point.… Read More

Moment to Myself

Learning to Say No: 4 Questions for the Busy and Overwhelmed

“It is not enough to be busy; so are the ants. The question is: what are we busy about?” ~Henry David Thoreau

A couple of years ago my friends and I went on a weekend retreat to honor our dear friend’s 40th birthday. It was supposed to be a relaxing weekend filled with yoga and meditation at an ashram in the mountains.… Read More

Envious

When Your Friend’s Happy News Fills You with Envy Instead of Joy

“It is in the character of very few men to honor without envy a friend who has prospered.” ~Aeschylus

It’s crazy, isn’t it?

Your best friend enthusiastically shares some big news. You say all the right things and display the right emotions. But inside you’re burning up. Instead for feeling truly happy, you’re filled with uncontrollable envy.… Read More

See the World

You Can Make a Difference: Just Open Your Eyes

“Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.” ~William James

My mind wasn’t able to percieve the reality around me. It had been ten days since I’d woken up with a feeling of constant energy flowing through my whole body.

It was so intense that I didn’t want to let it go.… Read More

Path to Self

3 Steps to Find Your Purpose When Life is Crashing Into Chaos

“What is my purpose here and how may I serve…in the midst of all this confusion?” ~Wayne Dyer

Your life is a mess and you can’t do anything about it, right?

Wrong.

You may be closer to the answers than you think, even while right in the middle of the chaos that showed up.… Read More

Yoga Dudes

Yoga Dudes for Movember Photo Contest ($1000 Yoga Gear Prize!)

I credit yoga with transforming and possibly saving my life, so I knew I wanted to get involved when I learned about Yoga Dudes for Movember.

In case you’re not familiar, “Movember” is a mustache growing charity event that takes place during—you guessed it—November.

Every year, men around the world grow handlebars and Fu Manchus to raise awareness for prostate cancer and other men’s health issues.… Read More

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