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Holding Hands

What We Need to Do Before We Can Have Happy, Loving Relationships

“Once you have learned to love, you will have learned to live.” ~Unknown

Ever since I was a young girl, relationships have fascinated me, particularly romantic ones. I had beautiful fantasies of my perfect partner appearing and completing me. We would fall in love and live happily ever after.

As a child, I believed that being in a romantic relationship, and especially being married, meant lasting happiness.… Read More

Shining Heart

Finally Letting Go of the Pain and Moving On after a Break-Up

“Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.” ~C. S. Lewis

Another year over and you’re still troubled by a relationship that ended last year or in years past. The whole thing is dragging on too long—why can’t you just get over it?… Read More

Happy

When Happiness Feels Like a Struggle, No Matter What You Do

“There is no reason to reach high for the stars. They are already within you. Just reach deep into yourself.” ~Unknown

I left a big job at a hedge fund in New York City nearly eight years ago. I was far from certain the job was to blame for my unhappiness at that time, but it was the biggest, boldest action I could take to make me feel like I was doing something to help my cause.… Read More

Excited

Celebrate Your Strengths Instead of Pushing Yourself to Be Better

“Make the best use of what is in your power and take the rest as it happens.” ~Epictetus

Performance reviews. Assessments. Evaluations. The dreaded annual review. Most of us have run into some kind of quality assurance technique while employed in the American workforce, or at least know someone who has.… Read More

Open Heart

Why Being Weak Is Actually the Key to Becoming Strong

“To share your weakness is to make yourself vulnerable; to make yourself vulnerable is to show your strength.” ~Criss Jami

“You have to be strong.”

Those were five words I heard without end after my father was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer on Black Friday 2012—a day that couldn’t have been more aptly named.… Read More

Superhero

Hang Up the Superhero Cape: We Don’t Have to Do It All Alone

“When we can no longer change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” ~Viktor Frankl

In the spring of 2008 when my son was only seven months old, I received a text message from his stay-at-home dad while I was at work. The text read, “He’s in the crib.” I did not respond because those five words said everything I needed to know.… Read More

Looking Up

Accepting Uncertainty: We Can Be Happy Without All the Answers

“The quality of your life is in direct proportion to the amount of uncertainty you can comfortably deal with.” ~Tony Robbins

I’ve recently begun to feel as though I am at a crossroads in my career and, as a result, have been feeling very uncomfortable.

I love what I do, working with clients and mentoring new therapists; however, I’m also a mom to two little ones and am feeling the ache of the impermanence of their childhood.… Read More

Walking Toward Sun

Learn from Your Mistakes and Find Opportunities in Your Problems

“Mistakes are a great educator when one is honest enough to admit them and willing to learn from them.” ~Unknown

We have all made mistakes and bad decisions in life. I have made more than most. Learning from these moments can be a paradigm shift if we discover the opportunity that is always present.… Read More

Watching Sun

How to Take Care of Yourself During Tough Times

“Have respect for yourself, and patience and compassion. With these, you can handle anything.” ~Jack Kornfield

Several years ago, within a matter of months, I experienced the death of a parent, the breakdown of a committed relationship, and the death of a treasured animal companion.

I’d been doing okay with “normal” life tension, but when all that crap hit the fan… Wow.… Read More

Happy Man

5 Habits of High Self-Esteem: Be Happier with Yourself and Your Life

“Stop beating yourself up. You are a work in progress; which means you get there a little at a time, not all at once.” ~Unknown

Ten years ago, when I was in my early twenties, I wasn’t really my own best friend.

I was in college and although things were going okay with my studies, I wasn’t very happy.… Read More

Meditating

What to Do When You Find It Hard to Do What’s Good for You

“If you correct your mind, the rest of your life will fall into place.” ~Lao Tzu

I know how you feel.

You know you shouldn’t eat that cookie, but it’s as if there’s something from deep within that compels you to move your arm forward, pick it up, and consume it in one, grandiosely guilty gesture.… Read More

Freedom

6 Tips to Help You Free Yourself from Your Fearful Thoughts

“Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it.” ~Eckhart Tolle

Here I am, huddled up close to the wood burner, my only source of heat, sitting on an old recliner chair that was given to me, in a rented apartment with windows soaked with condensation.… Read More

Happiness

Enjoying Our Passions Instead of Focusing on Status and Approval

“If your number one goal is to make sure that everyone likes and approves of you, then you risk sacrificing your uniqueness, and, therefore, your excellence.” ~Unknown

The year that I graduated from college with my undergraduate degree, I was beyond enthusiastic about being a teacher.

I was absolutely confident that I was a very gifted communicator and that I had a great deal to offer to the field of education.… Read More

Disappointed

Dealing with Disappointing Relationships: Change Your Expectations

“If you can’t change the circumstances, change your perspective.” ~Unknown

Sometimes it feels as if you are completely in control of your life, but when it comes to relationships there is always the other person.

In a relationship, you cannot be the puppeteer. People have their own emotions, behaviors, actions, beliefs, scars, wounds, fears, dreams, and perspectives.… Read More

Lijiang River

3 Lessons from Traveling That Lead to Everyday Happiness

“Remember that happiness is a way of travel—not a destination.” ~Roy M. Goodman

After graduating from college I took off to explore Europe for four months with one of my best friends.

We backpacked through fourteen different countries and learned things about the world and ourselves that we never expected. We often joked that we learned more about life and ourselves traveling abroad for four months than we did going to school for four years in college.… Read More

Find Inspiration

50 Ways to Find Inspiration: Create, Explore, Expand

“If we look at the world with a love of life, the world will reveal its beauty to us.” ~Daisaku Ikeda

I have always loved that scene in American Beauty when Ricky Fitts shows his video of a plastic bag blowing in the wind.

He’s the complete opposite of his neighbor Lester Burnham, who seems to have decided long ago to live life in a comatose state of submission, completely disconnected from authentic joy.… Read More

snowboarding

Why You Should Do That Thing You’ve Always Wanted to Do

“Better to do something imperfectly than to do nothing flawlessly.” ~Robert H. Schuller

In March this year, I did something I had wanted to do since the age of nine: I had my first piano lesson. At the time I was nearly thirty-five, so it had only taken me twenty-six years to get around to it.… Read More

Standing in the Sun

Change Your Life: Be Honest with Yourself and Make Conscious Choices

“If you do nothing unexpected, nothing unexpected happens.” ~Fay Weldon

During the last year I have made significant changes. I have changed my habits, values, thoughts, and perception of life. It has been an amazing journey and I have learned some valuable lessons that I want to share with you about happiness, motivation, and standing up for decisions you believe in.… Read More

Deep Thought

Make Peace with Your Past: Find the Good and Embrace the Lessons

“It’s not the events of our lives that shape us but our beliefs as to what those events mean.” ~Tony Robbins

Daughter of an alcoholic. Welfare recipient. Teenage mother. Non-college attendee. Poor decision maker. Unhealthy relationship participant. Financial disaster. Evictee.

All of these statements described me. They also propelled me into action, transforming me into an over-achieving perfectionist.Read More

Embrace the Moment

Be Happier with What Is by Letting Go of How Things Should Be

“What you do today can improve all your tomorrows.” ~Ralph Marston

Have you ever been stuck and felt like you’re spiraling around the same space over and over? It’s just like Groundhog Day.

Every day, you have new intentions about how it will be different only to be left with the same hollow feelings at the end of the day.… Read More

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