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How to Choose Peace When You’re Under Pressure

By in Blog, mindfulness & peace

“Let us fill our hearts with our own compassion.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

“Mom’s concentrating,” I tell my kids as I clean up after dinner. I suggest a game to keep them occupied. “How many words start with A?”

As I inspect the crumbs under the kickboard, I pay just enough attention to hear them play along.

“Mom. L!” (I must have drifted off.)

“Right. L is for?” And they’re off again. Be more present, be more present, be more present, I think.

M…N…O…I laugh to myself when we reach P. P is for pressure, that’s what, …

How to Stop Wanting to Be Thinner, Even If You’re Ambitious

By in Blog

“How pleasant is the day when we give up striving to be young or slender. ‘Thank God!’ we say, ‘those illusions are gone.’” ~Alain de Botton

Are you high functioning at school, college, or in your career, but dysfunctional with food? I was.

I’ve always been ambitious. I see things, and I wanna do them too, even better!

It’s a powerful trait, but unruly—like living with a big dog. Sometimes it strains on its leash and pulls you along further than you thought you’d go. And sometimes it knocks you onto the carpet and stands over you, panting, with its …

You Don’t Suck at Life: How to Stop Believing Your Inner Bully

By in Blog

“You’re too fat to wear that tight shirt to the gym.”

“You’re not smart enough to take the lead on that project at work.”

“You’re definitely going to screw up the vacation plans.”

“You’re not good enough, cool enough, likable enough.” 

“You suck.”

If we talked like this to anyone, it would be considered bullying.

And yet we talk to ourselves like this all the time.

We talk to ourselves in a way we would never talk to people we care about. We take these words to heart and believe them as truth.

We turn these words into …

Lessons from Infertility: What’s Helped Me Cope with Disappointment

By in Blog, change & challenges

“When you find no solution to a problem, it’s probably not a problem to be solved, but a truth to be accepted.” ~Unknown

For the longest time, I swore I’d never get married or have kids.

Growing up with an alcoholic father, in a domestic violence situation, shattered my young spirit and left me putting the pieces back together for years.

Since I didn’t see healthy coping skills growing up, it’s no wonder I grappled with my own addictive behaviors. I struggled with self-worth, focusing solely on accomplishments to fill a void inside of myself.

Externally, people saw a well-adjusted, …

Travel Tips for the Anxious Spirit

By in Blog, change & challenges, mindfulness & peace

“Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light.” ~Yogi Bhajan

For years, I avoided travel. Just the thought of leaving home made me anxious. I dreaded the crowds, the confusion, and the sense of disconnection from both my daily routine and my spiritual practice.

Over time, I came up with some great reasons not to travel, but I always knew those excuses were keeping me from exploring new places, meeting new people, and living my life to the fullest.

I continued to avoid traveling until family members moved across the country, and then I had no choice. …

Two Types of Boundaries That Can Help You Take Good Care of Yourself

By in Blog, healthy habits, love & relationships

“Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others.” ~Brené Brown

Do you have the courage to love yourself and set the boundaries you need?

For years I didn’t, and wondered why my life didn’t work. I didn’t really understand what boundaries were or why I needed them.

My severe lack of boundaries allowed me to give away my energy, time, power, and love to others, leaving virtually nothing for myself.

For years I lived in a perpetual state of lack, feeling like I wasn’t enough. Looking back, it makes sense …

Fellow Dreamers: If You Feel Like a Fool, You’re on the Right Track

By in Blog, meaning & passion

“Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.” ~Brian Tracy

I’m a fool.

Well, it’s more accurate to say I’ve been a fool often, and I’m ashamed.

My life, no different from many, has had some successes but also many setbacks and outright failures. I suppose this is just another way of saying I’ve lived.

The problem is that I’ve allowed my mistakes, errors, and failures to hold me back.

We’ve all felt like a fool before, but when has doing so made it …

5 Things to Stop Doing When You’re Struggling and Feeling Drained

By in Blog, change & challenges, letting go

“There is nothing in nature that blooms all year long, so don’t expect yourself to do so either.” ~Unknown

Recently I’ve been spread incredibly thin, and, at times, I’ve felt stressed to the max.

In addition to being at the tail end of a high-risk pregnancy, with complications, I’ve been working toward various new projects—not just for fulfillment but also because I’ve allowed the business side of running this site to slide for years. And I have a baby coming soon. It’s crucial that I revive what I’ve allowed to deflate because I’ll have a whole new life to …

3 Ways to Stop Obsessing and Start Enjoying More of Your Life

By in Blog

“Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.” ~Marcus Aurelius

I’ve come to realize that worrying and obsessing don’t help or change anything.

Hold up. Wait a minute!

Let me rephrase that, because worrying and obsessing do change things. They make your life worse. I think pretty much everyone in the world knows this, but how hard do we try to stop doing these things?

What If?

Every day you wake up and you think and obsess and wonder, “What if?”

What if I lose my job? What …

How to Embrace Your Sensitive Superpower and Stop Feeling Overwhelmed

By in Blog, change & challenges

“With realization of one’s own potential and self-confidence in one’s ability, one can build a better world.” – Dalai Lama

Sensitivity can feel like a gift or a burden, depending on our relationship to it.

If you often feel completely overwhelmed by an overload of stimulation, then your sensitivity probably doesn’t feel like an asset. Maybe more like a liability. But it doesn’t have to be this way.

As an introvert and sensitive person, I’ve navigated these waters my whole life, and I’ve come to realize that sensitivity is more than a gift—it’s a superpower! But first we need to …

Free 5-Day Mindfulness Challenge – Interview with Mindful in May Founder Elise Bialylew

By in Blog, mindfulness & peace

Every year, I share a little about Mindful in May, a month-long online meditation program that can dramatically improve your state of your mind and your life, while also transforming the lives of others living in poverty.

This year, I was grateful to connect with Mindful in May founder Elise Bialylew to learn more about the program; how mindfulness can help with depression, anxiety, and chronic stress; and how you can you can get a free taste of the already dramatically discounted program from April 8th through 12th.

Here’s what Elise had to say…

1. Can you tell us

…

Before You Send That Message to Your Ex, Consider This

By in Blog, love & relationships

“If the hurt comes so will the happiness. Be patient.” ~Rupi Kaur

What if I said instead of messaging our ex, we had a different choice, a choice that will be even more fulfilling than acting on the urge to share whatever we’re feeling right now?

It’s been over a year since I last spoke with my ex. While I’ve thought about him and missed him, I’ve known that getting in contact wasn’t the right thing, and so I haven’t taken any action to reconnect.

For the past few weeks, however, my thoughts have been seeping in, focusing on …

Why Compliments Made Me Cringe and How I’ve Learned to Accept Praise

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Even when the sea is stirred up by the winds of self-doubt, we can find our way home.” ~Tara Brach

What is it about praise that’s so hard to hear sometimes?

You know the drill. You do something noteworthy, like cooking a meal for your friends, or getting on stage to do a talk. Assuming things go okay, your friends or colleagues tell you a bunch of nice, encouraging things afterward:

“This meal is delicious!”

“You did great up there!”

And suddenly you feel uncomfortable.

Maybe you deflect those nice, encouraging words (“Oh it was nothing, really”). Or …

How Embracing and Loving My “Negative” Emotions Helped Heal My Pain

By in Blog, change & challenges, mindfulness & peace

“Do not fight against pain; do not fight against irritation or jealousy. Embrace them with great tenderness, as though you were embracing a little baby. Your anger is yourself, and you should not be violent toward it. The same thing goes for all your emotions.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

For a long time, heaviness and dark feelings were very familiar to me. In a strange way they were comforting; I felt safe in darkness. The light felt more painful to me, but I also wanted to change because I wanted to free myself from the limitations of staying in the dark.…

Why We Close Ourselves Off to Friendships and How to Open Up

By in Blog, love & relationships

“If you accept a limiting belief, then it will become a truth for you.” ~Louise Hay

Picking the flimsy gold lock on my groovy denim-covered childhood diary, I’m instantly transported back to my ten-year-old life.

Each page duly describes what I what I ate for dinner that day as well as what my two best friends and I got up to. It was 1976 and we were obsessed with Charlie’s Angels, cruising around “undercover” on our bikes, solving fresh crimes around the neighborhood.

Every couple of weeks I’d report the latest drama amongst the three of us. Either my …

My Needs Matter Too: How I Started Speaking Up and Setting Boundaries

By in Blog, healthy habits, love & relationships

“Setting boundaries is a way of caring for myself. It doesn’t make me mean, selfish, or uncaring just because I don’t do things your way. I care about me, too.” ~Christine Morgan

In my early twenties, I could shout into a megaphone at a political rally of thousands, but I couldn’t decline drinks from strangers at the bar. I could perform original music for an attentive audience, but I couldn’t tell my friends when I felt hurt by something they’d said. I could start a business, advocate for new laws at City Hall, and share deeply personal poetry on Facebook, …

Slow, Imperfect Progress Is Better Than None at All

By in Blog, meaning & passion, work fulfillment

“When perfectionism is driving, shame is riding shotgun, and fear is that annoying backseat driver.” Brené Brown

Sometimes I feel like the girl who cried film.

I first wrote a blog post introducing Tiny Buddha Productions three years ago, and despite my earnestness, passion, and enthusiasm, I have only one short film to show for myself.

When I was working on this short, which we filmed partly in my apartment—in my bedroom, amid the worn clothes and shoes in my walk-in closet even—I felt more alive and aligned than I’d felt in years.

I was doing something I’d wanted to …

Accepting My Autistic Self: Why I’m Done Trying to Fit In

By in Blog, change & challenges, letting go, love & relationships

“I care for myself. The more solitary, the more friendless, the more unsustained I am, the more I will respect myself.” ~Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre

A common misconception about autistic people is that we don’t care if we’re alone. Of course this varies with each person, but on the whole, it’s untrue. We want to feel included, it’s just not easy for us to fit in. There are other days when I feel autism has separated me so fully from other people that I am functioning on a different plane of existence, not just with a different …

How Getting Hit by a Bus Taught Me to Stop Worrying and Start Living

By in Blog, change & challenges, happiness & fun, love & relationships, meaning & passion

“Sometimes it takes a good fall to really know where you stand.” – Hayley Williams

How often do you appreciate the pleasure of taking a deep breath? Have you stopped worrying about what the world can do to you, and instead focused on what you can do in the world? Do you actively appreciate your life, as a part of your daily routine?

Odds are you do not. I know I certainly didn’t, until it was nearly taken from me.

I’ve been riding bicycles around New York City since I was a child. While cycling in the city used to …

When Expectations Hurt: How I’ve Forgiven My Absentee Father and Healed

By in Blog, letting go, love & relationships

“What will mess you up most in life is the picture in your head of how it’s supposed to be.” ~Unknown

I may have said a few words that hurt my father’s feelings, but…

See, here’s the backstory.

I’m thirty-four years old, and I started having a relationship with my biological father at age twenty-one. During my childhood years I would see him every now and then even though he lived less than three miles away from my home. I don’t have any memories of being with my dad for birthdays, holidays, family vacations, or even just hanging out watching …