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My New Approach to Setting Goals and Why It Works Better for Me

“The journey is long, but the goal is in each step.” ~Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

I have a daughter, she is nine.

A few months ago, I started to feel like we weren’t as close as we used to. I felt like we weren’t spending enough time together, and honestly, when we were I almost didn’t know what to do with her. It felt like our emotional connection was falling apart, like we didn’t have enough topics to discuss or enough games to play.

Moreover, I was getting stressed and annoyed with her easily, and it definitely wasn’t helping. I …

6 Emotions That Can Cloud Our Judgment and How to Make Better Decisions

“Don’t let your emotions outweigh your intelligence.” ~Unknown

I jump to ridiculous conclusions when I’m emotional, and I’m like anyone else in that sometimes they get the best of me. And it’s pretty damn embarrassing in those moments, especially if I’ve been stupid enough to make any kind of decision.

Having the awareness to recognize your judgment is clouded by emotion is next to impossible at times. Many of us don’t know how to read the signals. Hence why we get swept away by our caveman instincts and find ourselves saying, “All I see is red when I’m angry.”…

How I Stopped Procrastinating and Started Creating the Life of My Dreams

“Better to do something imperfectly than to do nothing flawlessly.” ~Robert H. Schuller

Here’s a confession: I’ve wanted to be a writer since I was thirteen years old when I first discovered the magic of words.

Here’s another: It was only at the ripe old age of twenty-six that I could truthfully call myself a writer.

Why did it take me so long?

I often think about that. Even today, when people ask me about my writing, I struggle to say that I am a writer. I am both proud and horrified, and I constantly wonder, what will I …

From Bombs to Bliss: Peeling Off the Layers of Childhood Trauma

TRIGGER WARNING: This post mentions bombs and executions and may be triggering to some people.

“Into your darkest corner, you are safe in my love, you are protected. I am the openness you seek, I am your doorway. Come sit in the circular temple of my heart, and let yourself be calm.” ~Agapi Stassinopoulos

I was six years old. My mother and I entered the bus to head home from downtown. Suddenly the sirens went off.

I felt a knot in my stomach. People started running around. A cloud of dust formed in the air. I could taste the panic. …

When a Mother Fails to Love: What’s Helped Me Move On

“You keep meeting the same person in different bodies until you learn the lesson.” ~Brandon Tarot

Like most girls in junior high school, I tried out for all the cheerleading squads every time tryouts came around—basketball, football, even wrestling. And like 95% of the girls, I never made the squad.

My kicks weren’t high enough, my splits weren’t split enough, my arms weren’t board-straight enough, I couldn’t jump high enough—and, let’s be real here: I wasn’t pretty enough and I wasn’t popular enough. After all, we are talking about junior high school.

But eventually, the one tryout came around that …

How To Make Yourself Stronger When Facing Health Challenges

“The beautiful thing about setbacks is they introduce us to our strengths.” ~Robin S. Sharma

This has been the worst year of my life. Financial stress. Relationship problems. Being separated from my family because of the pandemic. Mentally I’m a mess. I thought I had hit rock bottom. But the worst was yet to come.

I had been ignoring health issues for years and finally dragged myself in for an ultrasound. I already knew I had a fibroid and had booked the ultrasound to check on it. However, as the sonographer explained, I now had innumerable fibroids. They had taken …

Where Are You Right Now? The Importance of Living in the Present

“The more you are focused on time—past and future—the more you miss the Now, the most precious thing there is.” ~Eckhart Tolle

Where are you right now?

Maybe you are at your desk, scrolling through emails, trying to put off the morning’s work in hopes that it will go away if you don’t acknowledge it.

Maybe you are in your favorite chair with a cup of cheap coffee, enjoying the final moments of morning light.

Maybe you are walking through your school or office building trying to hurriedly read this from your phone before you bump into someone.

Wherever you …

How Shifting Your Attention Can Be the Cure for Anxiety

“Anxiety was born in the very same moment as mankind. And since we will never be able to master it, we will have to learn to live with it—just as we have learned to live with storms.” ~Paulo Coelho

“Am I focusing too much on my anxiety?”

This very question weighed heavily on my mind as I found myself in yet another bout of anxiety. I was playing professional baseball at the time, and I just couldn’t seem to free myself from the constant and unending worrisome thoughts racing through my head.

A lot of these thoughts centered around how …

Toxic Masculinity and the Harmful Standards We’re All Expected to Meet

Recently I woke up uncharacteristically early for a Saturday to meet a friend and her baby for coffee. I am embarrassed to say that by “uncharacteristically early” I mean 8:30am, which is not that early. I get it.

As I walked by two chipper twenty-something-year-old girls in skintight leggings either in route to or on their way back from a workout class, I found my mind reeling.

Why is it that I see so many more women in New York City whenever I wake up early on the weekends? Why do they seem so much more productive than men?

I …

How I Stopped Worrying All the Time and Started Feeling Good About Life

“We don’t see things as they are. We see things as we are.” ~Anais Nin

When I was young, I used to stare out into the big, blue sky and ask, “Is this really the right place?” “Did they drop me off on the wrong planet?” I wondered.

It felt like I didn’t fit in or belong. Things seemed so much easier for others. They moved forward with ease even when something was painful, while I felt an arrow pierce my heart every time a loved one was in pain, or a difficult situation arose.

When I looked around, I …

The Areas of Our Lives We Need to Balance to Find Peace and Contentment

“Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony.” ~Thomas Merton

Balance is everything and is really what we are striving to find in life. Balancing work and play. Balancing food and exercise. Balancing a social life and solitude. Balancing being and doing. Finding balance is finding freedom.

Once I was truly able to comprehend this it was a game changer on my healing journey. Any suffering you experience in life can be attributed to a lack of balance.

What is balance? The ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu speaks of The Dao, which …

10 Positive Things to Do for Yourself in the New Year

I think I know you pretty well. I know I don’t know you, know you, but I’m guessing since you’re here, you’re a lot like me.

You want to be your best self. You want to make the most of your life. You want to be the best you can be, physically and mentally, for the people around you. And you quite possibly will take a little time today to think about what you should embrace or release in the year ahead to boost your happiness and make a positive impact on the world.

Maybe you’ll make a list …

A Natural Approach to Mental Health: How to Reduce Anxiety Through Gardening

“When the world feels like an emotional roller coaster, steady yourself with simple rituals. Do the dishes. Fold the laundry. Water the plants. Simplicity attracts wisdom.” ~Unknown

I’ve suffered from anxiety since my childhood, but it was only seven years ago that I was formally diagnosed.

My symptoms began to get worse after my long-term relationship ended and I felt like my world had collapsed around me.

I was suffering from extreme fatigue, having trouble concentrating, not sleeping well, and I was constantly worrying.

Over the next couple of years my mental health continued to deteriorate, and I had trouble …

No One Starts Off at Their Best – Why We Need to Keep Going Anyway

“Others have seen what is and asked why. I have seen what could be and asked why not.” ~Pablo Picasso

This article is about the day I realized Picasso wasn’t born Picasso.

If you’re already opening Google to find what his name was at birth, I’ll save you the typing and tell you here…

He was born Pablo Ruiz Picasso. (His baptized name is wayyyy longer, but you get the point.)

Okay, so he was always a Picasso.

But he wasn’t always the Picasso.

Let me explain by rewinding a few years back…

I was in Spain for one of …

The Benefits of Solitude and How to Get the Most from Your Alone Time

“Understand that healing and growing can distance you from people who you once had a bond with, and it can also bring you closer to those who will heal and grow with you. The time in between can be difficult, but there is so much to learn in solitude.” ~ @themoontarot

There have been many occasions in my life where I’ve felt lonely. Some of these times I remember as incredibly painful; other times, I’ve relished in my solitude.

During some periods, I’ve even forced myself into seclusion, which comes easily to me as an introvert.

One thing all of …

How to Better Manage Stress So Little Things Don’t Set You Off

“It’s not stress that kills us, it’s our reaction to it.” ~Hans Selye

I was driving home from work, minding my own business, when a car cut in front of me.

Pretty common in Sydney traffic, right? Normally, I would just brush it off.

But not today. For some reason I couldn’t explain, that simple event set me off. I got so irritated that I pressed both my hands on the horn and started shouting at the other driver—who just gave me the finger and continued on his merry way.

That’s when I lost it. How dare he do something

Choose Joy and You’ll See the World with a Brighter Perspective

“We cannot cure the world of sorrows, but we can choose to live in joy.” ~Joseph Campbell

It’s been just under five years now since I had a head injury that changed my life forever.

Unfortunately, I spent more than two years going to multiple kinds of therapy and doctors several days a week and ultimately had to stop working. I was devastated.

I loved my career as a special educator and school administrator. I’d been in classrooms since I was twenty years old, and here I was at fifty-seven, suddenly unable to return to a school in any capacity …

How to Overcome Ultra-Independence and Receive Love and Support

“Ultra independence is a coping mechanism we develop when we’ve learned it’s not safe to trust love or when we are terrified to lose ourselves in another. We aren’t meant to go it alone. We are wounded in relationship and we heal in relationship.” ~Rising Woman

Do you feel like you have to do everything on your own?

Is it difficult for you to ask for and receive help in fear of being let down?

Have you ever heard the expression “Ultra-independence may be a trauma response”?

If this is you, I get it; that was me too.

Please know …

10 Easy Responses to Use When People Ask Why You Aren’t Drinking

Embracing the holiday season can sometimes mean embracing alcohol with gusto… or not. Fortunately for those who choose the former, “Dry January” has caught on over the years and it’s a fantastic concept. Going through a refresh is a perfect way to rid the toxins and melt the bloat away.

I’d like to throw out a radical idea, or should I say a radical self-care opportunity!

How would your holidays feel without alcohol?

You might gasp looking for a chair to sit down as you frantically wonder how on earth you would get through the parties, relatives, house guests, and …

BetterHelp: The World’s Largest Online Therapy Platform

**Though this is a sponsored post, you can trust I only recommend products and services I personally love!

If you’re like most people, you’re probably starting to consider the goals and dreams you’d like to pursue in the New Year.

Maybe you’re visualizing the person you want to be, reflecting on what you hope to accomplish, and strategizing about everything you need to do (and stop doing) to finally feel happy with your life.

Most of us spend our lives chasing happiness, checking accomplishments and milestones off a life to-do list, as if each pen stroke brings us one step …