Be So Happy…
You’re Not Behind; You’re Just on Your Own Path
“To wish you were someone else is to waste the person you are.” ~Sven Goran Eriksson
Endlessly comparing ourselves to others and idealizing their best qualities while underestimating our own are self-defeating behaviors, and they hurt our self-esteem. Yet in the competitive nature of our world, many of us do this.
As a result of my own self-defeating thoughts, throughout my life, I’ve repeatedly felt like I was five years behind where I “should” be.
After high school graduation, many of my peers went away to school and into a new wave of social experiences.
I stayed home, worked, and …
The Labels We Take On: How They Limit Our Potential
“Waking up to who you are requires letting go of who you imagine yourself to be.” ~Alan Watts
We live in a society of labels. Everyone will try to label you, including yourself. It’s been happening since the beginning. It takes some honesty and objective reflection to see it, but take a moment or two and really think about it.
Eventually, we each begin to subconsciously believe those labels and we start to feel as though to be whole, to be someone in this world, we need to appease our egos and the voices around us by “fitting-in somewhere,” …
Meditation Remixed: Movies, Pop Culture, and Inner Peace
DJ/VJ and Audio Visual Artist Brett Belcastro created an awesome remix video using over 80 scenes from movies and TV shows to entertain and inspire viewers to find peace within their minds. And entertain and inspire it does!
As a huge movie buff, I appreciate how Brett used pop culture to share the power and importance of meditation.
From the Vimeo page:
“The idea for this video remix came to mind about a year ago while I was listening to a guided meditation by the Deepak Chopra. I was so inspired after attending his ‘Seduction of Spirit’ seminar this …
How Simple Mini Habits Can Change Your Life
“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.” ~Alan Watts
It was late 2012, just after Christmas, and like many others I was reflecting on the year.
I realized that I had ample room for improvement in too many areas of my life, but knowing that New Year’s Resolutions have a poor 8% success rate (University of Scranton research), I wanted to explore some other options. I knew I wanted to start before January 1st too, because arbitrary start dates don’t sit well with me.
On December …
4 Ways to Know If You’re Ready for a Simpler Life
“Be who you want to be, not what others want to see.” ~Unknown
Growing up in a consumer society has its obvious advantages—technology is abundant, restaurants are everywhere your eyes can see, and grocery store shelves are always full. All of this leads to the illusion that everything is available, in quantity, all of the time, and for the most part it is.
I was born and raised in a consumer culture and I thought I had it all; the ability to buy whatever I wanted and needed was deeply ingrained in my psyche. In my childhood I had …
Finding a Good Match: Know What You Want and Need in a Relationship
“You’ll never find the right person if you never let go of the wrong one.” ~Unknown
I recently left a relationship that I was not happy in. Although my ex was definitely an unconditional lover, it painfully bothered me that the man I loved was not taking care of his responsibilities.
Since I’ve entered my twenties, I’ve been looking for more than just a good time; I need a stable partner who will be able to meet our shared expenses and obligations in the future. So, I was faced with the crucial, inevitable decision of calling it quits.
I cried …
A Lasting Romance Is Built on Flaws: 6 Tips for a Strong Relationship
“Let our scars fall in love.” ~Galway Kinnell
We all bring our own baggage to any relationship. I know that my past relationships have shaped my approach to love and romance. When we seek out that special someone to share our life, the disappointments of our past relationships tend to get in the way of new discoveries.
It’s human nature to size up a potential partner by drawing from past experience.
There are so many ways to catalog the possible flaws: He’s too short. She’s too tall. Too fat. Too thin. Not enough education. Too much education. Or you become …
We Have the Strength to Move Through Pain and Uncertainty
“Suffering is not caused by pain but by resisting pain.” ~Unknown
Earlier this year our beloved puppy got sick. Not just a poorly tummy kind of sick, but proper, life-threatening, blood transfusion-requiring sick. Suddenly. Unexpectedly. She was at death’s door.
The vet was talking to us in quiet and kindly tones. Using words like “grave.”
Her illness was apparently unusual in a dog her age. Her prognosis was uncertain. She would require months of treatment that may or may not work. We were to watch her for signs of deterioration. Note changes in her appetite and energy levels.
And then …
4 Tips to Help You Keep Going When You’re Filled with Doubt
“Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand-and melting like a snowflake.” ~Francis Bacon Sr.
“Just research, research, research. That’s what grad school is.”
It seemed as though that was all I was hearing from my professors, and it wasn’t helpful.
Since returning to school to get my master’s degree, I had maintained a 4.0 average, but I also hadn’t taken more than two classes at a time. Until now.
When I enrolled for the fall semester, I chose to take twelve …
How Acceptance Gives You Power (and How to Use It)
“Of course there is no formula for success except, perhaps, an unconditional acceptance of life and what it brings.” ~Arthur Rubinstein
I have the opportunity to meet fantastic people through my online radio show interviews. One of those people is an Australian author whose life circumstances led her to work alongside Mother Teresa.
Among the most impactful statements my guest made was that Mother Teresa was a woman of action. The dire environment of the streets of Calcutta required the help of someone with a big heart but also with a strong will to make change happen.
When my marriage …
5 Surprising Things I Learned During a Year of Silence
“Freedom is instantaneous the moment we accept things as they are.” ~Karen Maezen Miller
Four years ago I spent the better part of a year being silent.
A friend had told me that in silence, the bits of you that need healing heal themselves. He was talking about the bits of me that had pushed me until I was sick and depressed, too anxious to answer the door.
I call it my year of silence, but it was more like a year of “doing nothing” because I wasn’t silently reading a book or silently reorganizing my cutlery drawer; I was …
Create Something Beautiful with Your Disappointment
“We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose finite hope.” ~Martin Luther King Jr.
“You have to get out the whining,” my writing teacher told me, peering over a section of manuscript that dripped with self-loathing and pity. I swear I watched the words “Barren, empty, hollow shell…” fall flat to the floor and make the saddest plopping noise.
Those words haunted me for years; they still do sometimes when I get a baby shower invitation or walk by miniature sneakers at the GAP. Miniature sneakers dwell in the most emotional-scar-tissue-filled regions of my heart.
When I was twelve years …
When Things Don’t Go As Planned: Transform Disappointment into Action
“A man’s errors are his portals of discovery.” ~James Joyce
I’ve had a bit of experience with disappointment. I got very motivated to change my relationship with it when I was in my twenties and starting my acupuncture practice.
I knew it would take time to build my client base; what I didn’t realize, or more likely was in denial about, was that a very effective way of doing that was by arranging public speaking gigs. I absolutely hated public speaking. Big disappointment.
I also didn’t consider how much work running a business really was. I had to talk to …
When You’re Hard on Yourself: Replace Guilt with Self-Compassion
“Be gentle with yourself if you wish to be gentle with others.” ~Lama Yeshe
“Guilty,” admits an offender. “Guilty,” proclaims a jury. Things are pretty black and white in trial verdicts and courtroom pleas (although there are still plea bargains and hung juries, mitigating circumstances and appeals).
Life is rarely as cut-and-dried as the criminal justice system.
I’ve experienced guilt in different shades of grey—in rational and many irrational ways that bear no real relation to the “crime” at hand, or to any crime at all.
I’ve experienced guilt simply for how I think, how I feel, not for anything …
Developing Self-Compassion When You Don’t Think You’re Enough
“He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.” ~Lao Tzu
I’m at war with enoughness.
My stomach isn’t flat enough; I’m not extroverted enough; I don’t have enough money in my wallet; I’m not creative enough; I’m not getting enough work done.
There are times when the Jaws of Life cannot free me from my expectations and negative self-talk. The battle with enoughness is a vicious cycle.
Here’s an example: I’m both shy and introverted, so I’m afraid of being judged and I prefer quiet environments.
I was easily overlooked in school because I was reluctant …
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