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What to Do When You’re Panicking Because You Can’t Make a Decision

“No one saves us but ourselves. We alone must walk the path.” ~Buddha

I got a frantic message from a friend last night.

Everything was going wrong—her job, her relationship, her life—and she didn’t know what to do.

“Help me, please,” she kept saying. “I don’t know what to do.”

I tried hard to stifle a giggle. I know, completely inappropriate. But I found it really funny.

Why? Because I’m the last person anyone should be asking for advice. If I knew what to do, if I knew how to help her, I’d have:

  1. implemented this a long time ago

The Magic of Momentum: A Simple Path to Achieving Any Goal

“A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.” ~Confucius

What stops so many people from changing their lives is a lack of momentum. They feel daunted by the sheer size of the task ahead and so revert back to inertia. It’s so much easier to just trudge along and hope that one day it gets better.

I used to get up at 5.30 in the morning every Tuesday to attend a business networking breakfast. It was a severe shock to the system at first, and as I drove to the hotel where the event was held, …

Let Loss Remind You to Live

“Pain can change you, but that doesn’t mean it has to be a bad change. Take that pain and turn it into wisdom.” ~Unknown

Experiencing a death of someone, no matter how close you were to them, is a shock to the system.

One moment you’re just drinking your morning cup of Joe and then suddenly, you’ve collided with the uncertainty of existence.

Daily, we do everything we can to numb ourselves from our own fragility, but sudden death reminds us all that impermanence is still there under the surface, throbbing.

The other day, I logged onto Facebook and received …

How to Get Started with Meditation

“Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.” ~Simone Weil

It’s so easy in our busy, results-driven world to lose track of ourselves in a drive to address the needs of others. What with your work performance demands, evening dinner preparation, the Facebook post from a friend that requires your response before the sender gets upset… Wow, I’m feeling overwhelmed just writing about it!

The world demands our constant attention, and we willingly give it. But what about attention to ourselves?

Underneath every hood is an engine, behind any piece of artwork is the artist, and beneath your ability …

Why You May Feel Crushed by Criticism (And What to Do About It)

“If you keep your feathers well oiled the water of criticism will run off as from a duck’s back.” ~Ellen Swallow Richards

We all seek love, approval, and appreciation, don’t we? We sometimes obsess over what people think of us. When we receive feedback that seems less than favorable, we speculate for days about what it might mean.

Usually we attach the wrong meaning to it, and this drains our energy and might even cause us to withdraw and quit what we are doing.

Is there a way to avoid this? How can we keep our feathers well …

6 Ways to Free Yourself from Social Anxiety and Shyness

“Dont hide yourself. Stand up, keep your head high, and show them what you got!” ~ Joe Mari Fadrigalan

Do you struggle with social anxiety or shyness?

Is this anxiety affecting multiple areas of your life?

Are you yearning to break free from feeling isolated?

Like many people, I was shy as a kid. But I wasn’t just shy—I was painfully shy. I would avoid social situations like the plague. And I barely spoke because I stuttered.

My shyness followed me well into adulthood. I stayed away from social situations, fearing the embarrassment of stumbling in my speech. …

Choose to Forgive and Grow from Your Pain, Because You Deserve to Be Happy

“Bad things do happen; how I respond to them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have—life itself.” ~Walter Anderson

“Are you really okay?” I lost count of how many times my immediate family and friends asked me this question.

My positive, light-hearted attitude seemed to be difficult for people to comprehend, but for me it was the only option and means for survival.

I remember the …

You Don’t Need Anyone’s Permission to Do What You Want to Do

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition.” ~Steve Jobs

Two weeks ago, I pulled a muscle in my back. It was really scary in the moment, and initially I thought I was much more badly hurt—though it ended up healing miraculously quickly, after a couple days of intense pain and a couple more of …

How a Pause Can Help You Say No and Avoid Regret

No is a full sentence.” – Unknown

I like to help. I like to be kind. I like to join in.

Usually, these things happen as a result of saying yes. Generally it makes me feel good inside. Better about myself.

But what happens when helping, kindness, and joining in ends up being a burden with too many negative repercussions? Do we continue on the same path? Should we continue to say yes?

Throughout my life, I have had a good relationship with the word yes. Yes has led me to unexpected, beautiful, memorable experiences. Yes has brought …

How to Maintain Peace and Joy Despite Your Everyday Struggles

“In the midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you.” ~Deepak Chopra

For years I allowed everyday struggles, like slight disturbances from schedule, to steal my happiness, peace, and energy. Whenever something disrupted my plan, I got negative and started complaining.

When I realized this, I began taking steps to accept the daily chaos. I shifted my focus to how I percieve my daily life and how I spend the twenty-four hours I get.

I started asking questions, like: Am I being positive? Am I spending my hours in a way that’s productive yet joyful?

And I began …

How to Heal from Buried Pain: You Must Go Through It

“Two roads diverged in a wood and I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.” ~Robert Frost

When I was a child my friends and I often played a game called “Going on a Bear Hunt.” Each of the verses told of a different challenge, but offered the same advice—that you must go through it. One of the verses went like this:

“We’re goin’ on a bear hunt. We’re going to catch a big one. I’m not scared. What a beautiful day! Uh-uh! A cave! A narrow gloomy cave. We can’t go over it.

When Your Mind Feels Like a Prison and You Zone Out to Escape

“All the suffering, stress, and addiction comes from not realizing you already are what you are looking for.” ~Jon Kabat-Zinn

I’m currently obsessed with Orange is the New Black. As a binge TV watcher, I find dramas at least three seasons long and watch them like a prisoner eating a box of contraband donuts. I’m glued to the iPad in every spare moment, while I cook, exercise, or eat.

Then it’s over. And all I have left are wasted hours and a tidal wave of guilt. I always make the same promise to myself—no more binge watching.

I punish …

What to Do When Things Go Wrong and You Feel Sorry for Yourself

“We can always choose to perceive things differently. We can focus on what’s wrong in our life, or we can focus on what’s right.” ~Marianne Williamson

I was down in the dumps the other day and was feeling sorry for myself.

For some reason everything was just off. You know when you have one of those days when nothing seems to go right? And you get easily irritated and extra sensitive with everything?

It all began the night before. I was expecting a call from a guy who I’ve been getting to know. He said he was going to call …

4 Personality Types: Discover and Balance Your Elemental Nature

“Be gentle first with yourself if you wish to be gentle with others.” ~Lama Yeshe

Everyone has a personality. Unfortunately, though, most of us don’t understand the impulses that repetitively show up as our idiosyncrasies, better known as our ego.

If you are a sensitive type, you feel guilty for wanting to be alone; you’re sentimental and often quiet.

If you’re a thinker, you are indecisive, fickle, and starved for contact, needing someone to be around most of the time.

If you have a practical personality, money, work, and goals motivate you and give you identity.

And lastly, if …

How to Keep Your Spirits Up When You’re Bombarded With Negativity All Day

“In essence, if we want to direct our lives, we must take control of our consistent actions. It’s not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives, but what we do consistently.” ~Tony Robbins

Do you ever have to deal with negative people?

Do you ever have days where everybody seems to want to bark at you all day long?

Under those circumstances, you struggle to keep your spirits up, don’t you?

Well, I know the feeling—all too well, unfortunately.

Years ago, I worked in a collection department for an insurance company collecting the unpaid debts …

Lashing Out is Losing Control; Calmness Is Strength and Power

“Self-control is strength. Right thought is mastery. Calmness is power.” ~James Allen

I would like to share something personal with you. It’s the story of how I first glimpsed what true strength and power is and where they come from. I hope this story helps to further illuminate your journey through life.

I remember one day when I was in the back seat of my parents’ car. I was probably about thirteen years old. We were parked in a hotel driveway, waiting, though I can’t recall why.

After a few minutes, another car pulled up behind ours and the driver …

If It’s Hard to Say Goodbye, Your Life’s Been Truly Blessed

“You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one.” ~Unknown

On the evening of my high school graduation it hit me—the familiar faces and places I’d grown so accustomed to over the last twelve years would soon be changing.

The anxiety of that reality had started to creep into my psyche weeks ago, when I was being fitted for my cap and gown. Standing there looking in the mirror, I remember thinking to myself, “How did I get here?”

Somehow I had gone from a seven-year-old schoolboy to an eighteen-year-old teenager, and I …

Help Instead of Judging; They May Be Blinded by Pain

“We can judge others or we can love others, but we can’t do both at the same time.” ~Unknown

When I was eighteen, my father took his own life. I was just a baby, really, a mere freshman working on my Bachelors Degree at UMF.

There are times when I feel lost in the pain of missing him, stuck with this empty hole inside. Hovering in between confusion and anger, where the feelings consume me.

Losing my father in such a traumatic way has shown me just how deeply I can feel, how hard I can fall, how grief

Stop Trying to Fit In and Start Embracing Your True Self

“Don’t change so people will like you; be yourself and the right people will love you.” ~Unknown

I’ve always felt the pressure to fit in. There’s always been a gap between what I want to be and what I think the world thinks I should be.

I was a tomboy growing up. I climbed trees when other girls played with dolls, I played soccer in my teenage years when other girls wore dresses and went to parties, and even as an adult I preferred to watch the Saturday afternoon game rather than go shopping.

But the pressure to fit in

How Obsessing About Your Body Gets in the Way of What Matters

“Focus on what you want your life to look like—not just your body.” ~Sarah Failla

Growing up I never had much concern for the shape or size of my body. Perhaps once in a while the idea of losing weight or beginning an exercise routine crossed my mind, but it was always fleeting and I was quickly back to gossiping with my best friend or writing a note to my boyfriend.

Once I entered college I gained some weight, what with the unlimited access to Peanut Butter Cap’n Crunch (something that never, ever crossed the threshold of my childhood home) …