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6 Ways to Deal with Critical, Judgmental People

“When we judge or criticize another person, it says nothing about that person; it merely says something about our own need to be critical.” ~Unknown

We all have people in our lives who unintentionally hurt us. Their words may sound harsh. We may feel judged. And they may question our choices so much that we feel emotionally unsafe around them.

People can make comments about our career choice, living situation, life partner (or lack of), child-rearing decisions, and hobbies—and often when we didn’t ask for their opinion or advice.

Oftentimes, the healthiest choice is to stay away from these …

You Are Broken, Let Me Fix You

“To wish you were someone else is to waste the person you are.” ~Sven Goran Erikkson

Let me fix you.

You really should try not to be so sensitive, Leah. The world is sometimes a difficult and upsetting place, but you shouldn’t let it affect you so much.

Let me fix you.

You know, you really ought to spend more time with people, Leah. It’s not good for you to be alone so much.

Let me fix you.

You know, you really shouldn’t make such quick, spur-of-the-moment decisions, Leah. It’s not good to do that in life and you’ll end …

Reclaim the Forgotten State of Wonder to Live an Extraordinary Life

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle, the other is as though everything is a miracle.” ~Albert Einstein

For years, I walked as if I were asleep.

Autopilot steered me along the familiar paths between home and work and shopping centers and the gym. Paths I traveled so many times with my mind somewhere in the future or somewhere in the past, that everything around me passed like ghosts: present, unseen.

Sometimes, in a moment between waking and sleeping, I glimpsed marshmallow clouds, a burnt sunset, the bruised hills, the …

If You Want to Be Happy, Do This First

“When I had nothing to lose, I had everything. When I stopped being who I am, I found myself.” ~Paulo Coelho

Someone once asked me if I was happy.

The question confused me because it didn’t really seem like something I had a choice in.

I had two parents and wonderful siblings who loved me deeply. I was smart, a good friend, and had opportunities many people throughout the world didn’t have. I never worried about being hungry or safe. What else was there?

Unfortunately, growing up semi-privileged doesn’t prevent us from developing fears and insecurities.

Though there was laughter

3 Courageous Choices That Make Us Better, Happier People

“Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, ‘I will try again tomorrow.’” ~Mary Anne Radmacher

My daughter is the most courageous person I know. She’s two years old and fierce.

So often we think courage looks like a warrior, soldier, or athlete.

But I think we have it all wrong. Courage has a soft side that we have ignored for centuries.

Take my daughter for instance. The other day she was running full speed ahead at the playground. She was so focused on getting to her favorite slide that she …

Letting Go of Difficult Emotions eBook (Name Your Own Price!)

“If you let go a little, you will have a little peace. If you let go a lot, you will have a lot of peace.” ~Ajahn Chah

Growing up, I often felt emotionally overwhelmed, causing others to call me “too sensitive.”

It was very clear to me from a young age that emotion was a sign of weakness, but try as I may, I couldn’t escape mine.

I believed there was something wrong with me for feeling so deeply—that I was fundamentally bad because of it—then I felt bad about my inability to change.…

Create Lasting Habits: The 4 Psychological Triggers That Catalyze Change

“Things do not change; we change.” ~Henry David Thoreau

The world knows no joy like an evangelist with an opening. My eyes lit up as I jumped into my sermon on the incredible power of lifestyle change.

The year previous I had decided it was time to take charge of my health, and I had made some big changes.

I transitioned to a whole food diet, put plants at the center of my plate, started meditating regularly, and began attending yoga classes multiple times a week.

I was absolutely astounded at how the synergy of these three lifestyle changes completely …

It’s Okay to Need a Little Help

“Don’t look for someone who will solve all your problems. Look for someone who won’t let you face them alone.” ~Unknown

It’s 2004, and I awake in a student college in Melbourne, Australia. This comes as no surprise, because, at the time, I lived there.

I groggily stagger to the shared bathroom on my floor, to perform my morning washing routine. There’s nothing unusual about my lavatory procedure, so I’ll omit the details, for all of our benefits.

So far, so good. Already I’m full of optimism for today.

As I wash my hands, I glimpse myself in the …

Lessons from Almost Dying: How to Appreciate the Everyday Awesome

“We’re so busy watching out for what’s just ahead of us that we don’t take time to enjoy where we are.” ~Bill Watterson

“Rare as hell.” That’s how my doctor described my leukemia.

The cancer had gotten real aggressive, real quick, and I’d need some heavy-duty chemo and a risky bone marrow transplant if I had any chance of surviving. How good a chance? “Forty to fifty percent,” said my doctor.

Oof.

As an otherwise healthy twenty-seven-year-old, cancer had been the furthest thing from my mind. Now, every waking thought was consumed by it. But I wasn’t ready to die. …

The Art of Pain: Why the Dark Times Make Life Beautiful

“In each of us lie good and bad, light and dark, art and pain, choice and regret, cruelty and sacrifice… No one can live in the light all the time.” ~Libba Bray

Happiness, and the quest for it, is not all it’s cracked up to be. What I mean is that I think we’re making a mistake in reaching only for happiness, lightness, good days, and good moods.

I think that we’re restricting ourselves.

We’re fishing in an ocean of emotions, looking to only reel in one or two kinds, throwing back the ones we don’t want without even noticing …

Pearls of Puppy Wisdom: 7 Lessons from a Furry Little Sage

“Buy a pup and your money will buy love unflinching.” ~Rudyard Kipling

I didn’t even want a puppy really. Puppies are synonymous with poop and pee. Everywhere. At least until they’re trained, and that takes time.

Of course, they’re also synonymous with love and affection, puppy breath, and lots and lots of wet kisses. (I’ve learned to keep a towel handy around my little Bella.)

Certain things I sort of expected when we got our little girl.

I expected to lose some sleep for a bit.

I was prepared to sacrifice the cleanliness of our home for a while. (Puppies …

The Power of Presence : A Few Simple Ways to Enjoy Life More Now

“All that is important is this one moment in movement. Make the moment important, vital, and worth living. Do not let it slip away unnoticed and unused.” ~Martha Graham

I am someone who is always focusing on the next step rather than the step I am currently taking. I am always longing for the next thing in life.

Looking forward to the future isn’t a bad thing, but when it consumes 90% of your daily thoughts, it becomes a bit exhausting.

My energy has always been restless. I get bored easily, crave change constantly, and yearn for immediate fulfillment. At …

When You’re Busy Looking for Happiness in the Future

“You are not a drop in the ocean. You are the entire ocean in a drop. Seek the wisdom that will untie your knot. Seek the path that demands your whole being.” ~Rumi

It seems like there is so much busyness in the world today. When was the last time you stopped to focus on your breath and to truly settle into the moment?

When we’re busy, we don’t always prioritize these precious moments of full presence with our own aliveness.

Being busy can become like an addiction, an urge that drives us compulsively. But what are we really looking

We Are All the Same, So There’s No Reason to Hide

“One of the most calming and powerful actions you can do to intervene in a stormy world is to stand up and show your soul. Struggling souls catch light from other souls who are fully lit and willing to show it.” ~Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estés

It’s taken a long time for me to be comfortable with being completely myself.

Most people who meet me now see a strong and confident woman. Yet, underneath that confidence there is still a little girl in me that is scared. I’ve accepted that she is always going to be a part of me; however, …

Broken Hearts Can Lead to Awakened Souls

“For a seed to achieve its greatest expression, it must come completely undone. The shell cracks, its insides come out and everything changes. To someone who doesn’t understand growth, it would look like complete destruction.” ~Cynthia Occelli

There are no two ways about it.

Heartbreak squeezes you as though you were an orange, crushes you as though it were a tractor, and cuts sharply as a razor blade.

Breaking up with my former wife was the most crushing event in my life. It made me see myself as a failure, hide in embarrassment, and cry myself to sleep for months.…

A Powerful Way to Motivate Yourself to Pursue What You Want

“See the positive side, the potential, and make an effort.” ~Dalai Lama

Until fairly recently, I was somewhat afraid of talking to girls.

Well, that’s not exactly true. I was afraid of talking to girls if I had a romantic intent. If it was an innocuous conversation, I could be cool as a cucumber.

As you can imagine, this stifled my romantic life somewhat. If I met someone and things were going well, once I realized that she liked me a little and I could move things forward, I would freeze up. Self-sabotage.

This was very frustrating to me, …

4 Tips to Help You Choose When You Have a Lot of Passions

“Sometimes the wrong choices bring us to the right places.” ~Unknown

When I first quit my office job in 2012, I didn’t have a clue what I wanted to do with my life. My idea bank was at zero.

But for a full year after leaving my job, I committed myself to exploring and doing the things I’d always been too scared to do.

I took acting classes, traveled, volunteered on farms, started a blog, learned about a more sustainable lifestyle, and was initiated into Reiki.

After a while I realized my problem had spun a complete 360. My idea …

3 Steps To Embrace Your Beauty and Smile More Every Day

“Because of your smile, you make life more beautiful.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Is there anything more beautiful than a person smiling, or better yet, laughing? I don’t think so. It’s almost contagious.

You’ve likely seen the YouTube videos of babies laughing and couldn’t help but smile.

And there’s probably a special person in your life that only needs to smile and you feel your heart lift. Maybe it doesn’t even need to be someone you know. I’ve had this happen to me with a complete stranger.

When you see someone smiling from ear to ear, filled with joy, you can’t …

The Path to Freedom: Facing Painful Thoughts and Feelings

“Life is an endless process of self-discovery.” ~James Gardner

My thoughts lately have been so hurtful.

Things like: I’m not a good writer. I’m ugly. I’m stupid.

I’m not funny. I can’t carry a meaningful conversation. I’ll never be special.

The world is out to get me. People take advantage of me. I’m boring and don’t matter.

Like I said, hurtful. Crippling, demoralizing thoughts. One not-so-nice thing after another, and it makes me want to cry.

Why the pain? Why the negative thoughts? Well, recently I spent two weeks playing a video game.   From the time I walked through …

Remember This Before Judging Someone Who Annoys You

“We judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their behavior.” ~Stephen Covey

It happened again! A different place, a different person. But again, I was outraged! How could I let it go this time?

I was driving home from work, excited about the weekend. As I looked in the rear-view mirror, a bulky four-wheel drive gradually came closer. Next minute, it was right behind me. Another tailgater!

I sped up to shake it off. It stayed with me. I tapped the brake to tell the driver to back off. He came closer!

I was beginning to fume. As I …