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How to Stop Dwelling: A Simple Practice to Let Go of Anxious Thoughts

By in Blog, letting go, mindfulness & peace

“Change your thoughts and you change the world.” ~Norman Vincent Peale

We all encounter times in life when someone says or does something that offends us. After the fact, no matter how hard we try to let go of feelings of hurt or resentment, we might find it hard to move on.

I know, I’ve been there before myself, mostly when I wished I’d told people how I really felt in certain encounters, or when I doubted what I’d said or done and then replayed past events over again in my mind.

I am a reformed people pleaser, …

What I’ve Learned About Life While Volunteering in a Rwandan Youth Village

By in Blog, happiness & fun, love & relationships

“Perhaps travel cannot prevent bigotry, but by demonstrating that all peoples cry, laugh, eat, worry and die, it can introduce the idea that if we try and understand each other, we may even become friends.” ~Maya Angelou

Have you ever been in a situation where your thoughts and beliefs are put to test and you have to reconsider who you are? Do you adapt to a new environment or hold on to the values and cultural norms of your past?

I’m living in Rwanda for the next year, volunteering at a youth village that also serves as a boarding school …

Leaping into the Unknown: Why We Don’t Always Need a Plan

By in Blog, letting go, meaning & passion, work fulfillment

“You don’t always need a plan. Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, let go, and see what happens.” ~Mandy Hale

Wake up.

Wish I could go back to sleep.

Get up and ready for work. Tell myself that today I’ll leave earlier but then leave the same time as usual.

Walk to work. Pass all the same people I did yesterday. At the same time.

Arrive at work. Listen to the same people complaining about the same things. Complain about the same things myself.

Teach my classes. Tell people off for being late—the same people as yesterday and the …

My Proactive 8-Part Plan for Beating Anxiety and Negativity

By in Blog, change & challenges, healthy habits, mindfulness & peace

“Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

I’m on a much needed and looked forward to vacation with family whom I love dearly, and yet I’m entering the belly of the whale. Perhaps it was triggered by my habit of making sure everyone is okay and having a good time. Perhaps it’s because the act of preparing for and traveling to Baja was exhausting and now I’m just tired.

Whatever the cause, my anxiety starts as an uncertainty, an insecurity tickling the back of my skull. Then it attacks my ego, assigning me responsible for the self-created …

Tiny Buddha’s Gratitude Journal Giveaway

By in Blog, happiness & fun

UPDATE: The winners for this giveaway have been chosen. They are:

  • Keri Olson
  • Your Computer
  • Kelly Hawkins
  • Jadice-Teal N Momz
  • Maryrose

Hi friends! Last week I launched Tiny Buddha’s Gratitude Journal, after sharing some of the book’s fifteen coloring pages over the past several weeks. I’ve received some wonderful feedback so far, and I’m thrilled to know that so many of you are finding the book fun and helpful!

Along with today’s coloring page, I’m running a giveaway, offering five free copies. If you’ve already purchased one for yourself, you may want to enter the giveaway for a chance …

10 Things I Wish Someone Would Have Told Me When I Was 18

By in Blog, happiness & fun, meaning & passion, mindfulness & peace

“Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” ~Maya Angelou

Can you remember what it was like?

Becoming an adult. Having to take responsibility for your life. Having the world opening up to you. Having to suddenly start making decisions and setting a clear direction for your life.

Exciting, yet terrifying and confusing all at the same time.

Looking back, there are things you wish you’d known, right? Here are some things I’ve learned that I wish someone would have told me when I was eighteen.

1. You don’t find meaning; you

…

Think You’re Not Good Enough? How to Stop Holding Yourself Back

By in Blog, happiness & fun, meaning & passion, work fulfillment

“Stop holding yourself back. If you aren’t happy, make a change.” ~Unknown

Growing up in a culture where physical beauty determines how successful you are in finding a job, a suitable husband, and a promising career, and most importantly, bringing honor to your family reputation, I was a disappointment to my family, especially to my mother.

She was the definition of a perfect beauty—5’6″, slim, big eyes, high-bridged nose, perfect skin, and gifted with charisma. I was the opposite.

As I got older, my mother’s negative words got louder and louder. They were a constant reminder that I wasn’t good …

What Helps Me When I’m Tempted to Compare Myself to Others

By in Blog, change & challenges, letting go

“A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms.” ~Zen Shen

Wow, you’re a bit of a loser compared to this guy, aren’t you, Will?

He’s winning at life—great job, great house, obviously making better money than you.

I sigh deeply and continue scrolling.

He takes care of himself, no Buddha belly, unlike you.

It’s true. I begin to feel like a useless lump. I keep scrolling.

No yellow and crooked teeth, either.

“His teeth are pretty straight,” I think to myself, staring at the guy’s mouth on the screen.

Damn right, they’re …

The Delusion of Separation: We Don’t Need to Feel So Lonely

By in Blog, change & challenges, love & relationships

“The fundamental delusion of humanity is to suppose that I am here and you are out there.” ~Yasutani Roshi

You know those moments? Those brief, fleeting moments that shine through the grey of everyday life like motes of glitter caught in a sunbeam. The moments when you suddenly feel a connection to the world around you, when the quotidian alienation of modern life falls away and color pulses back in.

Walking through the torpor of another generic day, the background static of depression distorting the colors of the world, I often don’t realize I’m on a downward spiral until I …

9 Things Grateful People Believe About Life

By in Blog, happiness & fun

*This post was originally published at the end of 2015. Since this was around the time I decided to create my newly launched gratitude journal, it seemed fitting to share it again today!

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more.” ~Melody Beattie

My title was a little misleading, at least based on my personal beliefs.

I don’t believe the world fits neatly into some massive yin yang with grateful people on one side and ungrateful people on the other; but rather, we all go through times when we feel high and …

Why We Procrastinate and How to Finally Do What You’ve Been Putting Off

By in Blog, change & challenges, meaning & passion

“Low key change helps the human mind circumnavigate the fear that blocks success and creativity.” ~Robert Maurer

I’m currently working on my doctoral dissertation. It’s something I’ve been working on for many years. It’s something that I deeply believe in and want to complete, but I’m also the mom of two small kids and I run my own business.

Making time for to work on my thesis is low down on my priorities.

And for years I’ve been able to justify it to myself that I don’t work on it as much as I should because I don’t have the …

How My Drive to Succeed Led to Crippling Anxiety (And How I Got My Life Back)

By in Blog, change & challenges, letting go

“The only way out is through.” ~Robert Frost

The suffocating pressure from being obsessively focused on achievement and improvement led to escalating stress and anxiety over the years, but I ignored my feelings and kept attacking my goals.

Over time it became darker and heavier. It became crippling. It forced me to put a stop to almost everything in my life.

I’m a type A personality driven by a need for accomplishment. When I was in elementary school, I did my homework immediately after getting home even though my mom begged me to take a break. In high school, I …

Are You Really Listening? 4 Ways to Understand and Connect with People

By in Blog, love & relationships

“The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them.” ~Ralph G. Nichols

My partner and I were in our first few months of a long-distance relationship. This was a new stage for us and it meant altering our communication practices. Instead of sharing meals and museum exhibits, we had weekly emails and Skype chats.

Every week, I would pour my heart into long, detailed emails to him. I would describe everything that I had done and thought over the past few days.

On …

The Miscarriage: Why My Heart Feels Full In Spite of My Loss

By in Blog, change & challenges, letting go

“Suddenly you’re ripped into being alive. And life is pain, and life is suffering, and life is horror, but my god you’re alive and it’s spectacular.” ~Joseph Campbell

They say all feelings have a beginning, a middle, and an end.

The truth is that I’m still in the middle part, but I felt like it was time to share this story with you—not just for me, but for all women who have faced this and for all women who have made a plan and then surrendered as the plan changed.

Two months ago, I had a miscarriage.

The pregnancy …

Overcoming Envy: How to Stop Feeling Inferior and Insecure

By in Blog

“Comparison is the thief of joy.” ~Theodore Roosevelt

If you are suffering from the painful sting of envy, know that you are not alone. I was there too, for a very long time. Envy can be a crippling emotion. For me it has been connected to my depression, anxiety, and obsessive-compulsive disorder.

It has been a very painful twenty years since my attachment to envy began, involving comparison, competition, judgment, harsh criticism of myself and others, in a never-ending, futile attempt to soothe my wounded ego.

I was constantly, obsessively, relentlessly afraid of being inadequate and inferior—to a classmate, …

Tiny Buddha’s Gratitude Journal Launches Today – Last Day for 3 Free Gifts

By in Blog, happiness & fun

Today’s the day! I’m thrilled to announce that Tiny Buddha’s Gratitude Journal is now available for purchase, and if you order today, you can still get the three free bonus gifts.

I decided to create this gratitude journal/coloring book, with the help of the talented illustrator Rose Hwang, because gratitude and coloring have both greatly enhanced my life.

Coloring is not just for kids. It’s calming, creative, and meditative, and best of all, it’s easily accessible. You don’t need fancy equipment or an art class, just some markers or colored pencils and a little time and space to get lost …

How to Make Progress On the Goals You’re Tempted to Give Up On

By in Blog, change & challenges, healthy habits, meaning & passion

“To create more positive results in your life, replace ‘if only’ with ‘next time’.” ~Celestine Chua

Most of us start each year with good intentions. We have a list of things we’re going to start or stop doing. The year feels fresh, and it’s time to be the person that we’ve always wanted to be.

At some point in the year the shine wears off and we start to go back to old patterns and behaviors. Some of us even write off the entire year if we’ve failed at our new years resolutions by the time we hit February, and …

Morning Coloring Page from Tiny Buddha’s Gratitude Journal

By in Blog, happiness & fun, healthy habits

Hi everyone! This is my seventh week sharing coloring pages from the soon-to-be-released Tiny Buddha’s Gratitude Journal (available for pre-order now). Previously, I shared:

How would you answer the question in the middle?

Now that I get up much earlier than I used to, I appreciate that morning is my time for myself. On most mornings I meditate, sometimes while it’s still dark outside, and it’s usually feels quiet and peaceful around me.

I also appreciate …

When Too Much Stuff Gets in the Way of All the Good Stuff

By in Blog, letting go

“The secret of happiness, you see, is not found in seeking more, but in developing the capacity to enjoy less.” ~Socrates

When Hans and I relocated from Chicago to Ann Arbor, we wanted to live in a house with a big yard so we could plant flowers and get a dog.

There were two backstories feeding these wants. I grew up on a farm and we always had a dog or two. And having lived in Chicago three-flats for a decade, I was ready for some green grass.

There were other things on our wish list, including enough space (to …

Simple Steps to Live a More Authentic (and More Fulfilling) Life

By in Blog, meaning & passion

“When one realizes one is asleep, at that moment one is already half-awake.” ~P.D. Ouspensky

Growing up, the only truth I believed existed was that of the religion in which I was raised. The truth? The world was ending soon. I left it all behind in my mid-teens.

Little did I know it would take me another twenty-odd years to figure out my own truth and worse, that knowing this truth would initially leave me feeling disappointed.

Once I became a mum, that’s all I was—mum.

The concept of knowing my own truth didn’t even enter my mind. I had …