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There’s No Such Thing as Normal (and Other Lessons from Living Abroad)

By in Blog, love & relationships

“If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” ~Mother Theresa

By passport and birth, I am Romanian. By soul, I am a citizen of the world.

I’ve always been fascinated by cultures, traditions, mentalities, and different ways of doing things and perceiving the world. So when I got my first working contract in Sweden seven years ago, I embraced it with tremendous joy.

Four years later I took one of the biggest steps in my life and moved to Shanghai. I was an Eastern-European woman leading a Chinese team, in an entirely new environment, so different from …

The Power of Staying Put When You Feel Like Running Away

By in Blog, change & challenges

“You cannot keep running away from your fears. At some point in life you will have to build up the courage to face and overcome them.” ~Unknown

Last year my family and I relocated overseas from Australia to Singapore, which meant new jobs, new schools, new relationships—an entirely new way of living.

My husband was busy with his work, and I had two wide-eyed children looking up at mummy for direction. A part of me was excited for the challenge, but another part of me, of equal measure, was feeling overwhelmed by the prospect and struggling to let my feelings …

Our Power Lies In How We Choose to Respond to Our Pain

By in Blog, change & challenges

“The strongest hearts have the most scars.” ~Unknown 

Maybe it’s true, that the strongest hearts have the most scars.

And maybe the pain and the discomfort we experience in life can serve as a great teacher, if we choose to see it that way.

Everyone has bumps, bruises, and pains in life, right?

Things happen that are outside our control, and it’s up to each one of us to decide how these experiences shape us.

There are those who endure incredible trauma and pain and choose to use those experiences to see life differently. They learn from it, grow, and …

5 Beliefs About Anxiety That Can Make You Even More Anxious

By in Blog, change & challenges, mindfulness & peace

“It’s okay to not be okay all the time.” ~Unknown

I never thought of myself as an anxious person.

But here I was again, staring at a computer screen in my office, so stressed I could barely type. I’d been throwing myself into work and I had crashed—hard.

And this wasn’t the first time.

Unfortunately, our mental image of who we think we are and who we actually are don’t always match up. But part of being human is that we learn to live with that, we embrace the struggle, and we grow.

Over the last five years I’ve had …

Life Is Not a Race: Why We’ll Never Find Happiness in the Future

By in Blog, happiness & fun

“Life is not a race but a pace we need to maintain with reality.” ~Amit Abraham

Almost all of my adult life I’ve competed in the extreme sport of white-water kayaking.

My life revolved around adrenalin and competition.

Recently, I had a dream I will never forget:

I was running in a race and I was out in front, winning.

I got to a point in the course where there were no signposts showing the next turn. So I asked the race officials, “Where is the course?”

They replied, “We don’t know.”

The race officials couldn’t tell me where the …

Mindful in May: Get More Present and Help Fight Global Poverty

By in Blog, mindfulness & peace

It’s that time of year again! I’m excited to share that Mindful in May, the world’s largest online mindfulness fundraising campaign, has launched.

Join thousands of people across the globe and learn from the world’s leading teachers and well-being experts in this comprehensive one-month program.

For a limited time you can get a free taste of the program by accessing an exclusive video interview with Joseph Goldstein, one of the world’s leading mindfulness teachers, and also download two free guided meditations.

Get free access to this teaching and learn more about Mindful in May here.

The Mindful in May …

Attached to Your Smartphone? How to Break the Addiction

By in Blog, healthy habits, mindfulness & peace

“It is not what technology does to us, it is what we do to technology. Used skillfully, it can improve and enhance our lives beyond our wildest imagination. Used unskillfully, it can leave us feeling lonely, isolated, agitated, and overwhelmed. Get smart with technology, choose wisely, and use it in a way that benefits both you and those around you.” ~Andy Puddicombe

I love to receive a notification or two. Receiving those tiny pellets from the mobile universe gives me a nice little rush—especially when they’re arriving from a particular person. And browsing through certain apps is always enticing.

But …

How to Use Silence to Help Your Hurting Friend

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Sitting silently beside a friend who is hurting may be the best gift we can give.” ~Unknown

There’s a time for words and a time for silence. Thankfully, when I went through one of the darkest periods of my life, I had friends who knew what time it was.

When things go well, your friends don’t usually need to show up in silence. But everything changes when you go through a season of intense pain and disappointment. I know this from firsthand experience.

My life took a drastic turn for the worse when the first ride of the season on …

11 Life-Changing Lessons I Learned from My Mother After She Died

By in Blog, change & challenges, happiness & fun, love & relationships, meaning & passion

“Those we love never truly leave us… There are things that death cannot touch.” ~J.K. Rowling

Growing up, I was glued to my mother’s hip, ready to follow her wherever the world took us.

I used to sleep at her feet on the floor of her law school lecture halls while hundreds of students poured over scores of legal terms and historical court cases.

When I was six, we packed our bags to jet off on her semester abroad in Paris, and at fourteen, I stood beside her as she battled stage III breast cancer.

After my stepfather passed away, …

Overcoming Self-Sabotage: How to Stop Attracting Pain

By in Blog, change & challenges

“Life will bring you pain all by itself. Your responsibility is to create joy.” ~Milton Erickson

Sometimes, there comes a point in our lives when we need to let go of something painful, whether its guilt or a toxic relationship, but it’s equally difficult to let go and hard to live without. So we get uncomfortably stuck in the middle of two realities: where we are and where we want to be.

But do we really want to let go of the pain? Or is letting go so scary and unfamiliar that we’d rather hold onto it?

I’ve always …

Love Isn’t Enough (and Other Reasons I Ended My Toxic Relationship)

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Some people think that it’s holding on that makes one strong; sometimes it’s letting go.” ~Unknown

Sometimes we prolong relationships for the sake of comfort and familiarity. We’re fearful of what’s out there, and life without a partner. No matter how many times we’ve been hurt, taken for granted, or had our needs neglected, we still choose to stay even if our mind and heart strongly suggest otherwise.

I thought I was strong for putting up with my ex’s mistreatment. I had held the ability to forgive in high regard, and I wanted to keep that standard.

I’m not exaggerating …

How to Stop Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop and Start Living Fully

By in Blog, happiness & fun

“Use your precious moments to live life fully every single second of every single day.” ~Marcia Wieder

I recently came back from an amazing vacation overseas with my family. All of our travel went smoothly, everyone stayed healthy, and there wasn’t any drama or conflict among family members. Other than one flight being delayed, it was perfect.

On the way home from the trip my heart and soul were soaring from the fun we had enjoyed, savoring the memories in my mind and feeling grateful. I noticed, though, that when I returned home my mind slowly started to shift. …

Take the Leap: Reinvent Yourself and Be Who You Want to Be

By in Blog, change & challenges, letting go

“The only thing that punk rock should ever really mean is not sitting around and waiting for the lights to go green.” ~Frank Turner

I was exactly where I should have been on the afternoon I jumped. I was four years post-undergrad at an elite private college, halfway through a Masters Degree from the nation’s top Social Work program, about to begin an internship, and working three public service jobs simultaneously. My boyfriend had just moved into my apartment, and the feeling of being “settled” was just starting to sink in.

The remaining challenge of adulthood, it seemed, …

How Reframing Your Self-Critical Thoughts Can Help Ease Anxiety

By in Blog, change & challenges, mindfulness & peace

“Don’t let the sadness of your past and the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present.” ~Unknown

I know what it feels like to be scared.

I know what it feels like to question your sanity, your worth, your place in this world.

Sometimes, all I can do is repeat the words it’s okay over and over and over again in my head, until I kind of, somewhat, maybe start to believe it’s true.

Anxiety sucks. Depression does too. They’re not my favorites of the emotions we humans get to experience. But, truthfully, they have a purpose.…

What to Do After a Breakup: A Brief Guide for the Newly Single

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Even in the loneliest moments I have been there for myself.” ~Sanober Khan

Last year, I decided to leave my boyfriend, who I had a loving and wonderful relationship with. I left for logistical reasons. I didn’t like the city I lived in or my job. But my boyfriend was happy there, so he stayed and I left.

The world doesn’t prepare you for a broken heart. There aren’t benefits you can apply for when the person who’s been beside you for years one day isn’t. The reality is that unless you’re married, people understand your feelings for a …

The 4 Happiness Archetypes and How to Get Out of the Rat Race

By in Blog, happiness & fun

“When you dance, your purpose is not to get to a certain place on the floor. It’s to enjoy each step along the way.” ~Wayne Dyer

One day, I was complaining about not having enough days off to escape work and treat myself to a vacation. I was feeling stressed and tired. I can recall my stepfather looking into my eyes with a deep sense of peace and compassion.

“I hear you,” he said. “I know you work hard. Sometimes, I imagine myself jumping out of bed and going for a walk, whenever I want to.”

His words came …

Three Unexpected, Life-Changing Lessons I Learned at a Silent Retreat

By in Blog, letting go, mindfulness & peace

“Every moment is a choice to begin again.” ~Unknown

By day three of the five-day silent retreat I found myself wondering, “Why did I do this again?”

The pain of sitting in lotus position for eight hours a day was testing my patience. I was frustrated that my mind would only be still for a few moments, before interrupting itself with commentary on the fact that my mind was still, and I wasn’t feeling any spiritual awakening—although not being a particularly “spiritual” person, this wasn’t entirely surprising

So why had I decided to go on a silent retreat in the …

If You Want to Be Happy, Stop Pretending

By in Blog, happiness & fun

“If you want to be happy, don’t do something you don’t like. Don’t say something you don’t mean. Pretending and lying to yourself will only breed unhappiness.” ~Michael Lee

Do you like your job? Do you love your partner? Are you happy? You may answer yes to these questions, but is that what you believe deep down?

Most of us go through life pretending rather than living. We find it easier to tell ourselves that we feel good about something or someone than to admit we don’t. After all, contentment doesn’t require action. By convincing ourselves we’re happy when we’re …

Break the Cycle: How to Stop Hurting Others When You Were Mistreated

By in Blog, love & relationships

“What’s broken can be mended. What hurts can be healed. And no matter how dark it gets, the sun is going to rise again.” ~Unknown

I grew up with difficult and hurtful parents who spoke critically, with the intent to demean.

Each word of sarcasm, each thinly veiled joke or put-down undercut my self-esteem. Each knocked me down a rung in life and kept me from my potential.

Rampant comparisons to other Indian kids succeeding academically, attacks of my mediocre performance at school, and harsh language were my mother’s weapons of choice.

When someone attacks your self-esteem repeatedly, you …

How to Maintain a Sense of Peace No Matter What Life Throws At You

By in Blog, mindfulness & peace

“Ships don’t sink because of the water around them; ships sink because of the water that gets in them. Don’t let what’s happening around you get inside you and weigh you down.” ~Unknown

Do you ever feel like your life is a rollercoaster?

One second, you’re on top of the world. The next, you’re down in the dumps.

For me, this feeling of going up and down began back in high school.

Before then, everything in life seemed like a test run. Sure, there were exams, extracurricular activities, and the usual social pressures. But now that university was only a …