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Tiny Wisdom: On Helping Yourself

By in Change, Quotes, Strength

“The best place to find a helping hand is at the end of your own arm.” ~Swedish Proverb

Helping yourself is telling people what you need, even though you’re afraid to acknowledge it.

It’s forgiving yourself for your mistakes, even though you feel like dwelling.

It’s taking responsibility for your problems, even though someone else may have played a large part in them.

It’s breaking a problem into tiny, manageable pieces, even though you feel overwhelmed.

It’s living in accordance with your values, even when they stand in the way of something you think you want.

It’s allowing yourself to …

How to Change Your Mind and Your Life by Using Affirmations

By in Blog, change & challenges, healthy habits

“All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become.” ~Buddha

I used to teach Adult Upgrading. My students were people who had never completed grade school and/or high school. For a variety of reasons, they were now ready to try it again.

New students would say, “I wasn’t ever any good at school.” “I can’t do math.” “I hate fractions.”

It’s my belief that our self-talk is programming ourselves for our statements to be true.

Those students thought they’d been stating the facts, not revealing programmed beliefs.…

Tiny Wisdom: On How Much You’re Worth

By in Greatness, Quotes, Success

“The real measure of your wealth is how much you’d be worth if you lost all your money.” -Unknown

Before I started this site, I found myself in a horrible financial situation. I lost two well-paying jobs within the same week, and I quickly realized my unemployment benefits would just barely cover my rent. At 28 years old, I felt like I should have been a lot more established and financially secure.

But something kind of beautiful happened. I began forming close relationships with people who also got laid off due to the economic meltdown. Since we were in the …

6 ways to Deal with “I Should Be Better” Syndrome

By in Blog, change & challenges, letting go

“When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.” ~Lao Tzu

Pretty much everyone I know thinks they should be doing better in some way, at least sometimes.

Are you totally and completely satisfied with what you’ve done so far in life? No little part of you thinks, maybe I should have more money in the bank? Or maybe I should have a more professional wardrobe, or a book contract, or a dog that’s housebroken?

The word “should” isn’t exactly enlightened or peaceful, nor is the practice of judging yourself or believing that you’re not exactly …

Tiny Wisdom: On When to Hold and When to Fold

By in Challenges, Peace, Quotes, Strength

“All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.” -Havelock Ellis

Sometimes it’s difficult to know when to keep plowing ahead and when to accept that it’s time to move on.

You don’t want to give up on someone you love if you can make a positive difference in their life; but sometimes you need to let go and let them learn their own lessons.

You don’t want to give up on a dream when you’ve put your heart and soul into it; but sometimes you need to let go of the …

Forgive and Set Yourself Free

By in Blog, letting go

“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and realize that prisoner was you.” ~Lewis B. Smedes

We’ve all heard the saying “forgive and forget.”  It seems easy when you say it like that. The forgetting part can be daunting, though. I can say that when you let go, the memory dims. That’s a start.

I didn’t understand the importance of forgiveness until I was in my mid-forties. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve forgiven people over the years. I just never understood how it related to my own well-being.

Let’s face it, not forgiving someone for standing you up …

Tiny Wisdom: On Beautiful Things

By in Happiness, Love, Peace, Quotes

“The most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart.” -Helen Keller

Gratitude. Kindness. Joy. Vulnerability. Passion. Hope. Inspiration. Motivation. Loyalty. Awe. Authenticity. Selflessness. Thoughtfulness. Patience. Understanding. Trust. Simplicity. Serenity. Relaxation. Purpose. Peace. Generosity. Honesty. Integrity. Balance. Bravery. Love.

Look around. It’s a beautiful day, and because of all the good you do and create, you’re a beautiful part of it.

Photo by AlicePopkorn

How to Feel Comfortable in Your Own Skin

By in Blog, mindfulness & peace

You Are Beautiful

“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

From the time I was a little girl, people told me I was pretty, but I never believed them. Instead, I scrutinized myself in the mirror searching for ways to look better, not realizing that what I was really looking for was a way to be me and feel good about myself.

As I focused even more on my looks throughout my twenties, I became increasingly self-conscious and dependent on how others perceived me. If someone complimented …

Tiny Wisdom: On the Power of Trusting

By in Attitude, Peace, Perspective, Quotes

“You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don’t trust enough.” -Frank Crane

I had one of the most disheartening experiences of my life when I was 24. Some people I trusted conned me out of a huge chunk of my savings and then dropped off the face of the earth.

Later, I  questioned if I was being naive whenever an incident looked slightly similar. I instinctively mistrusted a lot of people, projecting past hurts onto them before they even had a chance to show their good intentions.

It was like …

Get Connected: How to Expand Your Offline Social Network

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Strangers are friends you have yet to meet.” ~Unknown

We are living in times of massive change.

Looking at some of the problems we are facing—the crumbling economy, environmental pollution, wars over scarce resources—sometimes the idea of moving far away to a remote mountain top seems very attractive. Or hiding in that small space behind the computer screen. Anything that helps us avoid real life and all its challenges.

But of course, if everybody thought that way, who would actually get up and do something about our situation? And is it enough to receive words of comfort through an email? …

Tiny Wisdom: On Being Seen

By in Quotes, Success

“Enthusiasm is the greatest asset in the world. It beats money, power, and influence.” ~Henry Chester

Influence has become a huge buzz word, particularly now that social media has taken the world by storm. There are sites to measure it. Blog posts that dissect it. Books that analyze the psychology of it. Collectively, we’re obsessed with the ability to persuade other people.

It’s not just about driving consumer behavior, although clearly that’s a big part of it–everyone needs to earn a living. It’s also not all about the ego–having the most followers, the most retweets, or the most influential friends. …

Lifestyle Design: How to Create Your Life As You Want It

By in Blog, meaning & passion, work fulfillment

“It’s never too late to be what you might have been.” ~George Eliot

If you read a lot of blogs or are even remotely tech savvy, it’s highly likely you’ve heard the term “lifestyle design.” Perhaps you’re wondering just what the heck it means, and how you can do it, too, just because it sounds so enticing!

In a nutshell, lifestyle design embodies the attempt on your part to design a life of your choosing, whatever that looks like. It’s your life, your plan, and you call the shots.

Just because your parents lived in a small town, got married …

Tiny Wisdom: On Loving Life

By in Love, Perspective, Quotes

“If we look at the world with a love of life, the world will reveal its beauty to us.” -Daisaku Ikeda

Whenever I visit my family in Massachusetts, I notice changes all around me. Sometimes it’s something major, like a Rite Aid where a Mom and Pop shop used to be. Sometimes it’s something less noticeable, like a new door on my parents’ neighbor’s house.

Other times, these changes take place in my family. My mother’s changed her hair color, or my sister looks completely different after weeks on a new diet, or my father’s decided to embrace bright-colored clothes–despite …

How to Enjoy Food More: 7 Tips to Savor Meals

By in Blog, healthy habits, mindfulness & peace

“We are indeed much more than what we eat, but what we eat can nevertheless help us to be much more than what we are.” –Adelle Davis

As I mentioned before in my blog post about needing less money, I recently decided to offer barter advertising through Tiny Buddha—meaning I plan to promote products and services I support in exchange for things I need.

This week I started my first barter arrangement with L.O.V.E. Delivery, a company here in Los Angeles that delivers organic produce right to your door.

Before my first shipment arrived two days ago, …

Tiny Wisdom: On Being Hard on Yourself

By in Happiness, Love, Quotes

“When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you.” -African Proverb

Sometimes we judge ourselves pretty harshly. We blame ourselves for things we have absolutely no control over. We criticize, berate, and even disparage ourselves, treating ourselves far worse than we’d ever treat other people.

It’s just all too easy to hold ourselves to high standards, and then get frustrated if we fail to meet them. I know I have done this before, and, at the risk of sounding defeatist, I know I will do it at some point again.

I believe that in much the same …

How to Let Go of the Need for Approval to Start Thriving

By in Blog, letting go, mindfulness & peace

“Criticism is something you can easily avoid by saying nothing, doing nothing, being nothing” ~Aristotle

The need for approval kills freedom.

Trust me, I know, because I spent my entire life seeking approval until I realized it was a waste of time and didn’t work anyway. The desire to get people to like me motivated the majority of my choices and actions in early life.

Queen of social chameleons, I mastered the art of telling people what they wanted to hear and being someone they would find impressive—all the while worrying incessantly about what others thought of me, fearing criticism, …

Tiny Wisdom: On Playing

By in Happiness, Quotes

“We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” -George Bernard Shaw

Playfulness becomes difficult when we get bogged in worries. Worrying sucks the joy out of everything. I know, because I’ve been there many times before.

You start a new project focused on your passions, and shortly after starting, you stress about where it’s going. Or you set aside some time to do something you enjoy, and before you know it you’re fixating on everything you have to complete on your to-do list.

We don’t stop playing because we no longer enjoy it. …

The (Real) Secret to Staying Young

By in Blog, healthy habits

“When you’re finished changing, you’re finished.” ~Benjamin Franklin

You know them well.

They pop out of every magazine you open and every billboard you drive by: skinny sixteen year-old models with blemish- and wrinkle-free skin staring blankly back at you. Like they own the place or something.

If you don’t have their complexion and shape you probably wince the same way I do when you see them splattered on that advertising campaign. Youth is where it’s at in the twenty first century.  We’re told it’s desirable and that we should want it—and inevitably, many of us do.

On any given …

Tiny Wisdom: On Discovering the Best in People

By in Love, Perspective, Quotes

“When we seek to discover the best in others, we somehow bring out the best in ourselves.” -William Arthur Ward

I read somewhere once that we tend to judge ourselves by our intentions and other people by their actions. In other words, we give ourselves the benefit of the doubt, whereas we’re more apt to assume other people mean to be cruel, inconsiderate, or hurtful when they make poor choices.

I suspect this is a survival strategy: We need to believe that we are good people in order to live with ourselves, and we want to quickly assess which other …

Creative Types: How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

By in Blog, meaning & passion, work fulfillment

“Just as much as we see in others, we have in ourselves.” ~William Hazlitt

Most days I am a dedicated writer and artist, focused and working away with my oh-so-happy hands.

Most days I feel inspired to share adventures and insights from living in Paris for over two years while going to graduate school. Or referencing the intense spiritual work and personal growth I’ve experienced in recent years. Or describing how I quit the unfulfilling rat-race to focus on my passion and my life dreams.

Most days I have confidence and pride in my personal creations and feel pretty darn …