fbpx
Menu

Blog Posts

How We Avoid Our Feelings and How Embracing Them Sets Us Free

By in Blog, change & challenges, mindfulness & peace

“We numb our minds and heart so one need not be broken and the other need not be bothered.” ~Peggy Haymes

Feelings are important, no doubt about it. They communicate all sorts of information to us. I don’t know about you, but I’ve preferred to ignore some of that information. Raise your hand if you would much rather feel the good feelings and just jump right over the not so good ones.

Okay, so it’s unanimous. We all prefer the good, happy feelings. I expect we are all experts at finding ways to avoid the uncomfortable ones. But …

Healing from Depression: It Begins With Asking for Help

By in Blog, change & challenges, happiness & fun, mindfulness & peace

“I speak of a clinical depression that is the background of your entire life, a background of anguish and anxiety, a sense that nothing goes well, that pleasure is unavailable and all your strategies collapse.” ~Leonard Cohen

Right before my eighteenth birthday, when I was about to go to university, I was hit by a car and sustained multiple fractures to my right leg. This led to a couple of operations and the best part of ten months with me unable to walk.

While all of my school friends and peers were having the time of their lives in …

One Simple Word That Can Change Your Life (And No, It’s Not “Thanks”)

By in Blog, change & challenges

“It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.” ~Epictetus

About nine years back I was at the lowest point of my life.

We had been trying to start a family for close to four years by that point.

The forty-plus consecutive months of “not pregnant” verdict were starting to take their toll on me. That second line on the pregnancy test strip seemed like it would never appear. Life felt like it was a never-ending cycle of false hope that was always crushed in the end.

I wouldn’t wish that kind of despair on …

3 Ways We Unconsciously Sabotage Our Relationships (And How to Stop)

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don’t know how to replenish its source.” ~Anaïs Nin

As a long-time commitment-phobe, my love life has been somewhat inconsistent, to say the least, but this year it seemed I’d finally met someone I was ready and able to think about building a future with. Still, along with this feeling of hope came some challenges that I had never experienced before in a relationship. (And yes, it did occur to me that maybe these two things went together!)

I knew I loved my partner, but we often seemed to argue …

A Small Good Thing: A Documentary on Simple Sources of Happiness

By in Blog, happiness & fun

We live in a world that encourages the pursuit of happiness, which it seems we’ve collectively defined as “more.” We chase more money, more recognition, more stuff, more connections (and often, more followers and “likes”). If it’s quantifiable, and sometimes even when it isn’t, there’s no such thing as enough.

Given that you’re here, visiting a website that promotes simplicity and appreciation for the little things, it’s possible you haven’t fallen into this trap. Or perhaps, like me, you have, and that’s why you now recognize that less is often more.

Given my own experience chasing things that inevitably led …

How We Can Stop Judging Others and Ourselves

By in Blog, love & relationships

“There is no path to peace. Peace is the path.” ~Mahatma Gandhi

We live in a world of ticker headlines, 24/7 news, and constantly updating Instagram and Facebook feeds. We are constantly making snap-decision judgment calls, categorizing what we see into “good,” “bad,” or “unimportant.”

In a second, we can see an image and believe we have all we need to form a fully realized opinion.

It’s in our biological wiring to judge everything we see—it’s how we have survived for generations upon generations. We are in a constant state of scanning our environment for threats and attempting to efficiently …

How to Rock Your Scars (Because They Mean You’re Strong)

By in Blog, change & challenges

“Never be ashamed of a scar. It simply means you were stronger than whatever tried to hurt you.” ~Unknown

“It’s such an ugly scar, I really don’t want anyone to see it.” This is what I told my daughter about a scar on my leg from an accident I’d experienced a year earlier.

I can remember the day so clearly when I slipped and fell, while skating, breaking my ankle and tearing a ligament. It was a painful experience with a long recovery. But I also felt embarrassed because I got injured during such a simple and fun activity.

I …

A Daily Self-Care Ritual for Anyone Who Feels Lost in Life

By in Blog, healthy habits

“When you recover or discover something that nourishes your soul and brings joy, care enough about yourself to make room for it in your life.” ~Jean Shinoda Bolen

We all get lost sometimes.

So lost that we lose track of who we are, where we’re going, what we want, and how to give ourselves what we need to feel nourished and healthy.

I’ve been there many times, enough times to realize that it’s an inevitable part of life, to realize that it’s okay to get lost.

The triggers? They’re never predictable.

Some are subtle and prolonged; some are brief but …

How Letting Go of Your Goals Can Make You a Happier Person

By in Blog, letting go

“No valid plans for the future can be made by those who have no capacity for living now.” ~Alan Watts

When I started kicking chairs at work, I knew things had gone too far.

I didn’t kick things when other people were around, and I thought it was the perfect way to release my anger. I could lash out with as much fury as I wanted, but I didn’t hurt anyone.

Why did I start kicking chairs? I’ll explain in a minute. But the truth was, I was hiding a bigger problem: I’ve spent much of my life …

7 Lessons to Remember When Life Seems to Suck

By in Blog, change & challenges

“I’m grateful for past betrayals, heartaches, and challenges… I thought they were breaking me; but they were sculpting me.” ~Steve Maraboli

I winced in pain as I climbed off the elliptical. This was one of the few times that I had ever set foot into a gym. And it was out of necessity rather than choice.

That necessity came from chronic lower back and leg pain, which I had been living with for the better part of six months. At the time, I didn’t know it would end up being just chronic, idiopathic pain.

All I knew was that it …

Dealing with Rejection: It Doesn’t Mean That You’re Not Good Enough

By in Blog, change & challenges, love & relationships

“The best way out is always through” ~Robert Frost

I was trembling as I hung up the phone. He’d dumped me.

It was as if, while I was watching a murder mystery at the edge of my seat, the electricity had gone out. Poof! I wasn’t going to get to see the end of the movie, and I had no control over when the lights would come back on.

I felt the fangs of rejection sink into my heart like a merciless tarantula. My mind, which is normally going 500 miles an hour, came to a halt. Suddenly I felt …

Does Your Partner Often Get Angry and Shut Down Emotionally?

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” ~Carl Jung

Three years ago I was on top of the world after realizing I had fallen in love with my best friend. Relationships this rare are beautiful, until one vital piece of them breaks down: clear communication.

Although I didn’t know it at the time, when my ex and I came together as a couple, rather than being in love, we were both just mirroring each other’s deep unconscious pain; his mother had walked out on him at a young age, and …

Coping with Suicide Loss: 9 Lessons for Hope and Healing

By in Blog, change & challenges, letting go, love & relationships

“It takes courage to endure the sharp pains of self-discovery rather than choose to take the dull pain of unconsciousness that would last the rest of our lives.” ~Marianne Williamson

“That boy is one in a million, Jill. He’s one in a million.”

These were my grandfather’s words to my mum about my brother, Mitch, when he was just a kid. He really was one in a million—a light that shone so bright as a child and early teen, only to then fade into shadows of desperation and defeat as he grew into adulthood.

No one really knows what’s going …

What Really Makes Us Happy, and Why

By in Blog, happiness & fun

“Whatever you do, make sure it makes you happy.” ~Unknown

Like many of us, I live paycheck to paycheck. Which is okay. We aren’t alone. CNN reported nearly 76% of Americans are living paycheck to paycheck.

I want to give a quick shout out to all the hardworking folks out there who budget every week to see how much they can spend on groceries. We got this.

So back to that 76% number, for the sake of simple math that means that three out of every four people are living paycheck to paycheck, which sounds about right in my …

How to Live a Good Life, by Jonathan Fields: Interview and Giveaway

By in Blog, happiness & fun

UPDATE – The winners for this giveaway are:

  • Joshira Maduro
  • Gerardo Corripio F
  • sian e lewis

What do you think it means to “live a good life”? Though we all have different answers based on our unique values and preferences, it’s likely yours involves peace of mind, love, fulfillment, and perhaps making a positive difference in the world.

Author and entrepreneur Jonathan Fields has a similar definition—encompassing vitality, connection, and contribution—and he’s explored it in his new book How to Live a Good Life: Soulful Stories, Surprising Science and Practical Wisdom.

I’m a huge Jonathan Fields fan because he’s genuine, …

You Have to Know You’re Worthy to Attract a Healthy Relationship

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Your problem is you’re too busy holding onto your unworthiness.” ~Ram Dass

Three years ago I went through a breakup with someone I loved deeply.

I had no idea what had happened to me after I fell in love with this girl. I now know that I was asleep from the beginning to the very end of the relationship.

I was totally encapsulated with this girl to the point where I could not see what was in front of me. I was unable to see the red flags that were there in the beginning.

When I first laid eyes on …

How to Deal with Painful Emotional Triggers in Your Relationships

By in Blog, love & relationships

“A comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there.” ~Unknown

I’ve been looking for a new job, so I recently decided to update my resume.

“Hun, can you please help me with that?”

“Of course, my love.”

“Thanks, babe.”

Not only did my wife help me revamp my resume, she drafted me a killer cover letter as well.

“You’re the best, babe!”

“Happy to help, sweetie.”

I opened the cover letter the other day and found a discrepancy, something that immediately touched my deepest core wound.

There, at the bottom of the page, where my name, …

I Choose Me (and Why You Should Choose Yourself)

By in Blog, happiness & fun

“One should always be on the trail of one’s own deepest nature.” ~Henry David Thoreau

I am watching my beautiful eighteen-year-old daughter begin to navigate life as a young adult. Dating, friends, work, school, future plans: the perennial Big Five in terms of potential landmines.

I am projecting like mad, reliving my own traumas, and hoping she will be more successful, more lucky, more savvy by a long shot than I ever was.

And mostly, I find myself on the sidelines silently urging her (okay, not always silently) to choose herself. 

Choose herself when the friend who only wants …

Trying to Change Your Life? 6 Reminders to Help You Keep Going

By in Blog, change & challenges

“You can’t change what’s going on around you until you start changing what’s going on within you.” ~Zig Ziglar

When you’re studying for eighteen years to have a chance at a better future, you’re not expecting to end up wearing yellow gloves and washing dishes, right? But what if I tell you that it made me happier than a job sitting behind a desk at a renowned institution?

You might be thinking now, “If this post is about how to change from a job behind a desk to one behind a sink, I better not waste my time reading it.” …

Healing the Inner Child: Free Yourself from Subconscious Pain

By in Blog, love & relationships

“The child is in me still and sometimes not so still.” ~Mr. Rogers

We’ve all been there. Either we’ve said “Stop acting like a child!” to someone who we felt was acting immature, or someone said it to us in a moment that we’re not too proud about. Many couples would sum up their frustration with their partner by saying that, at times, they act like a child.

For many of us, we continue to feel frustration and disdain for the part of us that seems to repeat in failure, pain, or foolish behavior. Whether it’s unhealthy relationships, acting …