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How the Need to Be Right Can Lead to Guilt and Regret

By in Blog, letting go, love & relationships

“The obstacles of your past can become the gateways that lead to new beginnings.” ~Ralph Blum

I think we all have this issue: guilt, followed by its sister, regret.

I didn’t realize how dark a blemish it was on my heart until I fully felt the anguish of my mother’s death. I never quite realized my full potential, courage, or strength until her passing.

Her greatest sacrifice, leaving this earth, proved to be my greatest motivation to search myself for the answer of whom I was and why; it was the major catalyst in my life for change.

Sometimes the …

Reconnect with Your Authentic Self Instead of Denying Your Feelings

By in Blog, happiness & fun, mindfulness & peace

“I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures.” ~Lao Tzu

I recently took seven weeks off of work and rented a place in Laguna Beach.

The trip was meant to be a relaxing vacation and possibly a change of residence; it turned out to be a wakeup call.

I started the trip out by going on my first date since 2010. The pollen count was high, and my sinuses were none too happy. I’m still not sure if it was being on a date or the medication that triggered so much anxiety…

5 Ways Meditation Can Improve Your Life and Make You Happier

By in Blog, healthy habits, mindfulness & peace

“If you correct your mind, the rest of your life will fall into place.” ~Lao Tzu

For most of my life I had the overwhelming feeling that I was lacking something. I felt like I was not good enough, smart enough, or pretty enough.

I was nothing but an unattractive, chubby girl of little worth. In my late twenties I formed a huge crush that changed my life, for the worse, or so I thought. Against my will, I developed an unbelievable attraction to women. I was horrified!

Being gay was the cherry on top of my pile of …

Letting Go of Your Past Suffering to Feel Peaceful and Free

By in Blog, happiness & fun, letting go, mindfulness & peace

“Letting go give us freedom, and freedom is the only condition for happiness.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

I stood alone in what had been my childhood bedroom, staring at the dresser with a familiar discomfort. My fingers clutched at the handle of the second drawer from the top and pulled hard, straining from the weight of its contents.

I reached in with both hands, the drawer with its quarter inch plywood base teetering dangerously on the edge of the frame, and lifted them out, one by one.

Unicorns, fairies, rainbows, mystical maidens, all disappeared as I placed the journals into the …

The Zen of Anger: 5 Tips to Overcome Negative Reactions

By in Blog, happiness & fun, mindfulness & peace

“When you blame others, you give up your power to change.” ~Anthony Robins

I used to be an angry person. And I was happy about that. In fact, I prided myself on that identity during high school.

So devoted to the young and vapid demographic, I would stand in front of the bathroom mirror and practice the eighties version of the mad dog stare. In the eleventh grade, I decided smiling wasn’t hip, so I stopped.

I wore surly like the Goth kids take to all-black attire. My friends thought I was cool because I said what I felt and …

Make Sure You’ll Smile When You Look Back on Your Life

By in Blog

“The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction, not a destination.” ~Carl Rogers

I had just gotten settled into my hospital bed after two hours of preparation. I had 32 electrodes taped to my bandage-wrapped skull, plugged into a machine that monitored my brainwaves, with just enough room to go from the bed to the bathroom.

After two ambulance rides and multiple seizures, I needed to find out what was going on with my brain.

The full diagnosis of my disease was still unknown then. The doctors told me it could be serious …

10 Ways to Deal with Negative or Difficult People

By in Blog, change & challenges, love & relationships, mindfulness & peace

“Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power.” ~Shirley MacLaine

I love her to death, but it’s draining to talk to her.

Every time I call this friend of mine, I know what I’m in for: a half-hour rant about everything that’s difficult, miserable, or unfair.

Sometimes she focuses on the people she feels have wronged her, and other times she explores the general hopelessness of life. She never calls to see how I’m doing, and she rarely listens to what’s going on in my life for more than a minute before shifting the focus back to herself.

I …

8 Ways We Block Our Creativity and Keep Ourselves Stuck

By in Blog, meaning & passion

“Accept your past without regret, handle your present with confidence, and face your future without fear.” ~Unknown

I have always considered myself a creative person, and formerly, I didn’t put much attention or energy into where  inspiration came from.

There was a time when I had just started writing copy, designing, printing, and hand-painting T-shirts. Having worked on a few creative ventures before then, I felt that this time things were different.

I urgently and passionately worked into the early mornings, designing and putting ideas and concepts on paper, afraid that I would lose the inspiration. Dramatic as it may …

Stop Running from Your Life and Start Living It

By in Blog

“Let yourself be open and life will be easier. A spoon of salt in a glass of water makes the water undrinkable. A spoon of salt in a lake is almost unnoticed.” ~Buddha

I spent most of my life running. I ran from people, commitments, physical locations, and most of all, myself. And if I wasn’t running, I was definitely thinking about it.

I always had great excuses. I wasn’t happy, didn’t fit in, wasn’t comfortable—the excuses were never ending. I was rarely content. So in late 2010, I decided that the best solution was to sell everything, uproot, …

Don’t Let Anyone’s Criticism or Judgment Define Who You Are

By in Blog, love & relationships, mindfulness & peace

“There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to you when you take nothing personally.” ~Don Miguel Ruiz

I was a chunky, shy little girl who was attached to my mom’s leg. She was my protector and served as a source of unconditional love.

As I left my mom’s side and went off to school, I encountered many new faces that introduced me to criticism and judgment.

Being judged by your physical attributes as an adult, in a society that constantly strives for physical perfection, is hard enough, but understanding those judgments as a little girl can be …

4 Ways to Use Journaling to Calm Your Inner Critic

By in Blog, happiness & fun, mindfulness & peace

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” ~Eleanor Roosevelt

It’s a voice we’re all familiar with, and one that we all find challenging. Yes, the inner critic is the part of our internal dialogue that can make or break our day.

At its best, our inner critic helps us live in a way that’s true to our values, questioning decisions that we might regret later and keeping us on the straight and narrow. At it’s worst, however, an inner critic rampage can bring down our mood, self-esteem, and sense of self-worth.

Much of my own self-work has …

The Story So Far: Your Life Is How You Interpret It

By in Blog, happiness & fun, letting go

“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.” ~Carl Bard

My life has been a long string of failures.

The earliest I can remember is having my teeth knocked out when my grandpa braked too hard at a stoplight on our way to a church Easter pageant. I was supposed to be singing a solo, the part of the “little gray lamb,” and I did it—performing while clutching a bloodstained washcloth wrapped around ice cubes to hold to my front gums in between verses.

Dumb …

5 Steps to Make Change Work for You

By in Blog, change & challenges

“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.” ~Alan Watts

Life is a free-flowing, ever changing river. Riding the rapids is frightening, and the temptation to avoid it is alluring. However, the adventure it promises is equally attractive.

We are naturally primed to adapt. Yet, the possibility of having to give up what is familiar is daunting. It can leave one paralyzed, disoriented, and unable to move forward.

In my childhood, my family kept moving across cities and often within the same city. By the time I …

Helping Others Helps Us All: We’re All in This Together

By in Blog, happiness & fun, letting go, love & relationships, mindfulness & peace

“Pain is not a sign of weakness, but bearing it alone is a choice to grow weak.” ~Lori Deschene

I, like many of you I’m guessing, am a wanderer. A student of the soul. At times it can be a bewildering path. Most days I give thanks for the adventure. Many others I wish for clarity and certainty.

But though I am a wanderer, I am not aimless: I have a path as deep and true as any other. I simply have no map to guide me, only my intuition, and the myriad teachers that cross my …

10 Simple Ways to Make the World a Better Place

By in Blog, love & relationships, meaning & passion

“As one person I cannot change the world, but I can change the world of one person.” ~Paul Shane Spear

I have always wanted to change the world.

I remember being four years old, sitting glued to the television on Sunday mornings, not watching cartoons, but utterly captivated by World Vision. I cried about the injustices in the world, and begged my mother to let me sponsor Maria, the girl with the large, sad eyes who was around my age.

My mom patiently tried to explain to me that we couldn’t afford to send her money. I couldn’t understand, …

Introducing Tiny Buddha’s Community Forums!

By in Blog, change & challenges, happiness & fun, healthy habits, letting go, love & relationships, meaning & passion, mindfulness & peace, work fulfillment

After much time and planning with Joshua Denney of Think Web Strategy, I’m thrilled to announce that Tiny Buddha now has a new responsive design and community forums!

The new design enables for a better reading experience on mobile devices, and also gives you access to forum-related information right on the homepage.

Why Join The Tiny Buddha Community Forums?

The forums are a place to connect with the community, to share ideas, and to give and receive support. You’ll find topics related to:

  • Art
  • Crafts
  • Emotional Mastery
  • Fun
  • Health & Fitness
  • Parenting
  • Purpose
  • Relationships
  • Spirituality
  • Tough Times
  • Work

Since …

Finding What We’re Missing: Our Lives Are Already Complete

By in Blog, happiness & fun, love & relationships

“Each day is a journey, and the journey itself is home.” ~Basho

What does family mean? Is it the people whose genes you share? Is it the people that you grew up with? Is it the people who love you unconditionally in spite of your faults and flaws?

Family for me has been an evolving idea. I was adopted from Seoul, Korea when I was four months old. After a few months in an orphanage, family started off simply as the people I grew up with.

Raised in South Central Pennsylvania with a Caucasian family in an area …

How to Deal with Uncomfortable Feelings & Create Positive Ones

By in Blog, Featured, happiness & fun, healthy habits, mindfulness & peace

“Hope is the feeling that the feeling you have isn’t permanent.” ~Jean Kerr

For most of my life, I was a fugitive from my feelings.

Psychologists suggest that we are driven by two connected motivations: to feel pleasure and avoid pain. Most of us devote more energy to the latter than the former.

Instead of being proactive and making choices for our happiness, we react to things that happen in our lives and fight or flee to minimize our pain.

Instead of deciding to end an unhealthy relationship and open up to a better one, we may stay and either …

How Taking Quiet Time for Yourself Helps People Around You

By in Blog, love & relationships, mindfulness & peace

“I wish I could show you, when you are lonely or in darkness, the astonishing light of your own being.” ~Hafiz of of Shiraz

“What I wouldn’t give for a few moments of silence.”

“I really should start meditating.”

“I know it’s important to take breaks, but I just don’t have time.”

We’ve all heard (or made) comments like these at some point. Implicit in these statements is the idea that resting in stillness is beneficial…for the individual.

But what if such a practice of peace is more than that? What if it’s beneficial for others in your family, your …

10 Tips to Help Relieve Depression and Heartache

By in Blog, happiness & fun, letting go, mindfulness & peace

“As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.” ~Johann Von Goethe

Not long ago I was completely imprisoned within myself, feeling lost without any direction. Sleeping consumed most of my time. I had brief moments when I checked in on Facebook, only to get a glimpse of others’ seemingly perfect lives with holidays, parties, babies, and weddings.

This made me more miserable, as I felt I had nothing going on in my own life.

Frustration was building within me because somewhere deep inside, the dreams that I had hidden away wanted me to start pursuing …