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Why We Feel Lonely and What to Do About It

By in Blog, love & relationships

“At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.” ~Lau Tzu

With social distancing measures in place in response to the new coronavirus, many of us have a lot more time on our hands, while also being isolated.

This may also mean you’re feeling loneliness more intensely than you’ve experienced it before.

This is a good thing! Challenges can help us to understand ourselves on a much deeper level than we would have if we weren’t challenged—precisely because our feelings are more intense.

Loneliness is not new. …

Don’t Let Hope Keep You Stuck

By in Blog, change & challenges

“I hope that this whole COVID-19 thing goes away so we can resume our regular lives.”
“I hope this quarantine will be over soon!”
“I hope that things will go back to how they used to be.”

You may be thinking, wishing, or even hoping these things—and are just waiting for things to get better. That was definitely me the first few weeks of quarantine.

Recently I’ve been pondering the possibility that COVID-19 may actually never go away and we may have to learn to adapt and live with it. It may be like influenza—seasonal, with a recommended shot, and …

We’re All in This Together, and That’s a Beautiful Thing

By in Blog, love & relationships

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Lessons in life will be repeated until they are learned.” ~Frank Sonnenberg

Right now, I am living my life in lines.

This is not code for something philosophically abstract or profound. I am literally living my life in lines.  Lines with approximately six feet between me and the woman in colorful exercise clothes; the man in Carhart jeans, hoodie, and baseball cap; and the young mother with her rosy-cheeked toddler bobbing up and down in a seat in the cart, singing …

When Someone I Respected Violated My Trust…

By in Blog, love & relationships

“This above all: to thine own self be true.” ~William Shakespeare

Though I appeared pretty high-functioning and what you might call “normal” as a kid, I was a ball of self-doubt and insecurity from an early age.

Overthinking, scrutinizing my actions, and generally worrying about what people thought came as naturally to me as breathing. Life felt like a great balancing act between who I thought I should be and who I actually was—and it was pretty exhausting.

You can imagine my relief when, while browsing for a textbook in the library at eighteen, I discovered the self-help …

5 Positive Lessons from the Coronavirus Crisis

By in Blog, change & challenges

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“What is to give light must endure the burning.” ~Viktor Frankl

The world is facing challenging times of crisis. Closed borders and travel bans, quarantine, shortage of food supply, scary news, and much fear. Viruses don’t care about our status, money, or fame, spreading from state officials to famous actors.

Being a human right now is not easy. My thoughts are with those who lost a family member or a friend. I can’t imagine the pain of those battling mental or …

HumanKind: A Book That Will Inspire You and Help Change the World

By in Blog, love & relationships

I have always believed that kindness is the truest measure of beauty. And I need only think of my grandmother to confirm that this is true. Giving, nurturing, understanding—she was all these things till the day she died, undeniably radiant, at the age of eighty-four. She smiled with her eyes and loved out loud, and that’s who I want to be.

If you’re fortunate, you’re close to someone like this, a person who exudes warmth and meets you with gentleness and compassion, even when you’re not at your best.

If you’re observant, you’ll see people from all walks of life …

Disconnected and Strong in the Face of COVID-19

By in Blog, love & relationships

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Distance sometimes lets you know who is worth keeping, and who is worth letting go.”
~Lana Del Rey

As COVID-19 started to change my life I found myself thinking about my family. My parents who I haven’t really spoken to much since 2007, and my sister. I wondered how they were doing and what they must have been feeling at that moment.

Then I stopped myself and reminded myself why I had cut connections with them in the first place. …

How to Be Really Great at Failing

By in Blog, change & challenges, meaning & passion, work fulfillment

One of my dad’s favorite stories to tell about me when I was a kid is when I played catcher in Little League. I was probably around seven years old, but I had (and still do have) an intensity that wasn’t matched.

I would squat behind home plate, the catcher’s gear a little too big for me, and punch my fist into my catcher’s mitt, just like my favorite player Mike Piazza. And like Bruce Lee, I’d point my index finger at the pitcher and signal him to “bring it.”

One time, a foul ball was hit into the air. …

How to Tame a Worrying Mind During Difficult Times

By in Blog, change & challenges, mindfulness & peace

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Mental health is just as important as physical health.” ~Unknown

Our main focus during this challenging time is quite rightly on our physical well-being. But we shouldn’t forget about our mental health considering these are stressful times for all of us.

Will we get sick?

Will our loved ones die?

Will we have enough food to feed the family?

How will we pay the bills?

Will things ever get back to normal?

So many questions, so many worries.

Worrying used to …

What I Learned About Love and Grief When I Lost My Cats

By in Blog, change & challenges, letting go

“Until one has loved an animal, a part of one’s soul remains unawakened.” ~Anatole France

Unconditional love.

The thought of my cats envelops me with warmth whenever I think of them.

Why? Because we’re so connected. It’s an ethereal thing. Beyond words. Beyond reality. Beyond rationality.

When I’m holding them, I feel so spiritually connected. They stretch out as I start to scratch their backs, signaling that they like it. A welcome sign I should continue.

They stare with their mysterious eyes. Their stares are hard to read. Yet, they tell you a lot of things. They open the flood …

Beating the Coronavirus Pandemic: It’s All About Endurance

By in Blog, change & challenges

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“When you’re going through hell, keep going.” ~Winston Churchill

A couple weeks ago the Greek government announced that our quarantine would continue “well beyond April 6th,” the original date for which it had been set. We knew this was coming, but it was still hard to hear.  And it was this same moment that my memories as a long-distance runner came flooding back.

I started running track and cross country when I was eleven years old. I joined the Los Gatos …

What to Do If You Can’t Forgive

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Your heart knows the way. Run in that direction.” ~Rumi

“I know I should forgive but I can’t.” I squirmed in my seat as I said this to my teacher.

I said this immediately after I explained all that I’d experienced during our meditation exercise.  In the meditation I’d had a vivid recollection of the constant verbal and emotional abuse I’d received from my dad.

It had been ten years since I’d lived at home, but I was still angry, still carrying all of those emotions from years ago. Instead of telling me all the virtues of why it’s important …

Autoimmune & Coronavirus: Beating the Panic & Fear in All of Us

By in Blog, change & challenges, mindfulness & peace

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“The problem is not the existence of stressors, which cannot be avoided; stress is simply the brain’s way of signaling that something is important. The problem—or perhaps the opportunity—is how we respond to this stress.” ~The Book of Joy

For the past few weeks, I took pride in being able to keep fear at a distance.

My motto was “Don’t let the fear in. The fear makes you a vulnerable host to coronavirus.”

Since I have Crohn’s disease, an autoimmune condition, …

Being Skinny Doesn’t Make You Fit or Healthy

By in Blog, healthy habits

“Your body is precious. It is your vehicle for awakening. Treat it with care.” ~Buddha

As a 5’4″ petite, half-Asian, people have always assumed that I’m fit. However, my slender figure hid the sins of a poor diet and exercise routine for a decade.

The truth is, being skinny doesn’t make you healthy. There are many hidden dangers of being so-called “skinny fat.” (Though this is a commonly used term for unhealthy skinny people, it’s worth noting that bigger doesn’t always mean unhealthy. So perhaps a more accurate term would be “skinny unhealthy.”)

Skinny fat, also known as “normal …

How I’m Finding Hope in the Pandemic

By in Blog, change & challenges

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“We must be willing to let go of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” ~Joseph Campbell

It’s hard to believe the state of the world we are in. It feels like 2020 has become the plot of an apocalyptic movie.

A microscopic virus invades planet earth targeting human beings. As mass numbers of human beings retreat indoors, wildlife begins to flourish. Slowly, continent by continent, the human bacteria is eliminated. Only the …

How Being in a Toxic Relationship Changed My Life for the Better

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars.  You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.” ~C.S. Lewis

My ex and I split up about five years ago. We had been married for seventeen years, and after that long, I figured we were home free, as far as lasting marriages go. Needless to say, when it happened, I was devastated. Over all those years of being a couple, I had lost a big part of myself. Without that relationship, who was I anymore?

I was terrified of being alone, which led …

Maybe This Forced Pause Is Actually Good for the Planet

By in Blog, change & challenges

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“The earth is what we all have in common.” ~Wendell Berry

 I love the warmth and brightness of sunny days, but I’ve always enjoyed the stillness that comes around as the rain starts to fall, as well.

Creatures retreat to the warmth and dryness of shelters and home spaces. Outdoor work and routines are rethought, sometimes placed on pause. The world, at least as far as the rain clouds stretch, quiets.

In some ways, these current moments in our world feel …

How Conflict in Relationships Can Be a Catalyst for Growth

By in Blog, love & relationships

“The mind is the place the soul goes to hide from the heart.” ~Michael Singer

“You think you’re so much better than me!!”

As this phrase—laced with contempt—exited my mouth, I recognized the familiar words. I had grown up hearing this phrase often. The “rich people,” the girl who won the competition, the inconsiderate neighbors, the rude supervisor… “They think they’re so much better than us.”

So, I diligently spent my childhood trying to prove them all wrong.

I wore myself out trying to be the smartest, the best, the prettiest… you name it. I wasn’t going to let all …

The Power of Social (Media) Distancing

By in Blog, letting go, love & relationships

“Less social media, more everything else.” ~Unknown

It’s been a long time since I’ve engaged personally on social media. A while back I made the conscious choice to stop scrolling online and start focusing my time IRL. I was shocked when I did the math. Scrolling for just twenty minutes a day adds up to fifty days over ten years.

As a busy mom of six, my time is precious, and I don’t want to spend my minutes, hours, days, and years getting sucked into the social media vortex.

I admit, however, that social distancing has me wanting to reach …

14-Day Meditation Challenge: Put Down Your Phone and Be

By in Blog, mindfulness & peace

EDITOR’S NOTE: You can find a number of helpful coronavirus resources and all related Tiny Buddha articles here.

“Meditation is the ultimate mobile device; you can use it anywhere, anytime, unobtrusively.” ~Sharon Salzberg

I came home from my doctor’s appointment last week and rambled off three to four different things that were happening in the world as a result of the coronavirus. By the fourth item my wife asked me to stop. She said please tell me something good.

I told her that my doctor said my pathology report came back negative. That the procedure on my neck had …