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My home will be a home with no loud anger, no explosive rage, no slamming doors or breaking glass, no name calling, shaming, or blackmail. My home will be gentle, it will be warm. It will keep my loved ones safe. No fear, no hurt, and no worries. I may come from a broken and twisted place, but I will build something whole and safe. I’ll sing in the shower again, cook with a smile, and dance in all the rooms. I will heal.

I think something people need to understand is that others disliking you is not a bad thing. When you are embodying your true authentic self, it creates fear in people who still operate from the ego. If you want to grow, heal, and evolve you have to let go of wanting to be liked.

It’s up to us to break generational curses. When they say, ‘It runs in the family,’ you tell them, ‘This is where it runs out.’

Life is like photography. You need the negatives to develop.

Avoiding your triggers isn’t healing. Healing happens when you’re triggered and you’re able to move through the pain, the pattern, and the story, and walk your way to a different ending.

Sometimes things have to go wrong before they can go right. Sometimes we have to let the wrong people walk out before we allow the right people to walk in. Sometimes we have to feel weak in order to know what it’s like to feel strong. Sometimes you have to be broken to realize you’ll never be shattered.

Walk away from people who put you down. Walk away from fights that will never be resolved. Walk away from trying to please people who will never see your worth. The more you walk away from things that poison your soul, the healthier you will be.

Happiness turned to me and said, ‘It is time. It is time to forgive yourself for all of the things you did not become. It is time to exonerate yourself for all the people you couldn’t save, for all the fragile hearts you fumbled with in the dark of your confusion. It is time, child, to accept that you don’t have to be who you were a year ago, that you don’t have to want the same things. Above all else, it is time to believe, with reckless abandon, that you are worthy of me, for I have been waiting for years.’

We didn’t understand as children that our parents still had work to do on themselves.

The broken will always be able to love harder than most. Once you’ve been in the dark, you learn to appreciate everything that shines.

Someone once asked me how I hold my head up so high after all I’ve been through. I said it’s because no matter what, I am a survivor, not a victim.

When someone comes looking for the old you, pulling triggers, but cannot find you, that’s healing.

You are being presented with two choices: evolve or repeat.

When a flower doesn’t bloom, you fix the environment it grows in, not the flower.

Agreeing to things just to keep the peace is actually a trauma response. When you do this you’re disrespecting your boundaries. No more making yourself uncomfortable for others to feel comfortable. You have control now. You run your life. Take up space and use your voice.

When trauma has shaped you, try not to confuse who you had to become with who you can be.

Look at you! Healing those traumas, addressing those bad habits, holding yourself accountable, no longer seeking validation from others, and finally speaking your personal truth. Seriously, I applaud you! Growth gets messy, ugly, and painful, yet here you are growing. We see you!

Beneath every behavior there is a feeling. And beneath each feeling is a need. And when we meet that need, rather than focus on the behavior, we begin to deal with the cause, not the symptom.

You can’t heal the people you love. You can’t make choices for them. You can’t rescue them. You can promise that they won’t journey alone. You can loan them your map. But this trip is theirs.

Stay in the moment. The practice of staying present will heal you. Obsessing about how the future will turn out creates anxiety. Replaying broken scenarios from the past causes anger and sadness. Stay here, in this moment.