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Category “mindfulness & peace”

There’s More Right in the World Than You Might Think

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“When you turn on the television … you run the risk of ingesting harmful things, such as violence, despair, or fear.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

I passed the rack of newspapers on my way into story time at the library, ignoring the latest headlines. Murder, mayhem, war, disaster—it all calls like a siren at sea. My pace picks up as I turn the other direction.

My two-year old charge, whom I affectionately call Little Man P, is captivated by the animated librarian. She impresses me with her liveliness and ease in handling a room full of kiddos. It is clear she …

Overcoming Fear-Based Thinking and Creating a Happy Mind and Life

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“Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” ~George Addair

My parents were teenagers when they had their first of three children. I was the middle child. They were uneducated, poor, and had very difficult upbringings.

As I recall my childhood, most of what I remember is how fearful both of my parents were.

They were constantly stressed out about money, the kids, the tattered house, the rusty car, and everything else in their lives.

My mother, my first role model, was so scared of the world. She definitely had an undiagnosed anxiety disorder. She was afraid to …

How to Transform Self-Criticism into Self-Appreciation

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“Stop hating yourself for everything you aren’t. Start loving yourself for everything that you are.” ~Unknown

They stop you dead in your tracks.

Critical thoughts.

Like tiny knives, they slash at your happiness.

In public, you feign confidence. You can easily squish down your critical thoughts. You push yourself to smile, laugh, and even be the life of the party.

But when the dust settles, and you are all alone, the thoughts start, first as a trickle: “I shouldn’t have said that. Why couldn’t I say smarter things?” And then they start to crash harder and stronger with, “I am …

How Meditation Calms Your Mind and Makes You Feel More Alive

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“While meditating we are simply seeing what the mind has been doing all along.” ~Allan Lokos

People around the globe have practiced meditation for centuries upon centuries, and it’s quickly becoming one of the most popular pastimes in the modern world. It’s one of the most effective ways to find inner peace, relax, and cope with stress.

I’ve had my share of stress and troubles over the years. I remember one time, nearly eight years ago, when the stress and anxiety really got to me and made my life miserable.

I was facing the prospect of being made redundant at …

The Key to Freedom: Minding Your Own Business

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“The day you stop racing is the day you win the race.” ~Bob Marley

Let me take you back to the beginning of my day, how I used to do it.

Flicking through my Facebook newsfeed, clicking on profiles, scrolling through comments, monitoring social interactions, checking how many likes my last post or profile picture got. Then I’m going to my therapist, to talk about how worthless my own life is, how inadequate I feel.

I’m not saving the world, pursuing my passion, making friends, or traveling. Neither am I getting married or engaged nor having children—and I do …

10 Simple Ways to Ease Your Anxiety Today

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“Smile, breathe, and go slowly.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

As an almost recovered anxiety sufferer I know what it’s like to feel stressed, out of sorts, desperate, and unlike yourself. I know what panic attacks feel like; I’ve had many. I wouldn’t wish them on my worst enemy.

Anxiety can be debilitating and affect every area of your day-to-day life.

I remember about four years ago, when I was feeling so overwhelmed and anxious I could barely leave my house. I had three young children at the time. It was all I could do to get through each day.

Just …

Forgiving Abusive Parents and Setting Ourselves Free

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TRIGGER WARNING: This post deals with an account of physical abuse and may be triggering to some people. 

“Forgiveness is not always easy. At times, it feels more painful than the wound we suffered, to forgive the one that inflicted it. And yet, there is no peace without forgiveness.” ~Marianne Williamson

Growing up in the seventies and eighties with Italian immigrant parents definitely had its challenges. In a family of four girls, I was number three. That in itself was tough enough. Never as good as the first-born and not as loved and protected as the baby. Yes, it …

Two Steps You Might Be Missing If Forgiveness Doesn’t Stop the Pain

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“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and realize that prisoner was you.” ~Lewis B. Smedes

When someone you care about hurts you in some way, most people tell you that to move on, you have to forgive.

They say forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself. You have to understand what happened from their point of view. Life is too short to hold a grudge or be angry.

Well, what if you do all that?

You forgive. You understand that they really didn’t mean to hurt you or if they did mean to, you understand where …

We Are Enough and We Don’t Need to Be Perfect

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“You alone are enough. You have nothing to prove to anybody.” ~Maya Angelou

Every day on TV, the media tells us how we should be and how we should look.

In mainstream society we are taught to identify with our physical body and our possessions.

We are led to believe that if we look a certain way, we will be happier, loved more, and accepted by others. I used to believe this. I bought into it hook, line, and sinker.

I came across a photo of myself taken about twelve years ago, and I looked radiant. The sun lit …

Let Loss Remind You to Live

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“Pain can change you, but that doesn’t mean it has to be a bad change. Take that pain and turn it into wisdom.” ~Unknown

Experiencing a death of someone, no matter how close you were to them, is a shock to the system.

One moment you’re just drinking your morning cup of Joe and then suddenly, you’ve collided with the uncertainty of existence.

Daily, we do everything we can to numb ourselves from our own fragility, but sudden death reminds us all that impermanence is still there under the surface, throbbing.

The other day, I logged onto Facebook and received …

How to Get Started with Meditation

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“Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.” ~Simone Weil

It’s so easy in our busy, results-driven world to lose track of ourselves in a drive to address the needs of others. What with your work performance demands, evening dinner preparation, the Facebook post from a friend that requires your response before the sender gets upset… Wow, I’m feeling overwhelmed just writing about it!

The world demands our constant attention, and we willingly give it. But what about attention to ourselves?

Underneath every hood is an engine, behind any piece of artwork is the artist, and beneath your ability …

You Don’t Need Anyone’s Permission to Do What You Want to Do

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“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition.” ~Steve Jobs

Two weeks ago, I pulled a muscle in my back. It was really scary in the moment, and initially I thought I was much more badly hurt—though it ended up healing miraculously quickly, after a couple days of intense pain and a couple more of …

When Your Mind Feels Like a Prison and You Zone Out to Escape

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“All the suffering, stress, and addiction comes from not realizing you already are what you are looking for.” ~Jon Kabat-Zinn

I’m currently obsessed with Orange is the New Black. As a binge TV watcher, I find dramas at least three seasons long and watch them like a prisoner eating a box of contraband donuts. I’m glued to the iPad in every spare moment, while I cook, exercise, or eat.

Then it’s over. And all I have left are wasted hours and a tidal wave of guilt. I always make the same promise to myself—no more binge watching.

I punish …

4 Personality Types: Discover and Balance Your Elemental Nature

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“Be gentle first with yourself if you wish to be gentle with others.” ~Lama Yeshe

Everyone has a personality. Unfortunately, though, most of us don’t understand the impulses that repetitively show up as our idiosyncrasies, better known as our ego.

If you are a sensitive type, you feel guilty for wanting to be alone; you’re sentimental and often quiet.

If you’re a thinker, you are indecisive, fickle, and starved for contact, needing someone to be around most of the time.

If you have a practical personality, money, work, and goals motivate you and give you identity.

And lastly, if …

Lashing Out is Losing Control; Calmness Is Strength and Power

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“Self-control is strength. Right thought is mastery. Calmness is power.” ~James Allen

I would like to share something personal with you. It’s the story of how I first glimpsed what true strength and power is and where they come from. I hope this story helps to further illuminate your journey through life.

I remember one day when I was in the back seat of my parents’ car. I was probably about thirteen years old. We were parked in a hotel driveway, waiting, though I can’t recall why.

After a few minutes, another car pulled up behind ours and the driver …

4 Powerful Mantras to Help You Deal with Fear and Anxiety

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“Trust that, when you are not holding yourself together so tightly, you will not fall apart. Trust that it is more important to fulfill your authentic desires than listen to your fears. Trust that your intuition is leading you somewhere. Trust that the flow of life contains you, is bigger than you, and will take care of you—if you let it.” ~Vironika Tugaleva

Anxiety has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. But a year ago marked my first full-blown panic attack.

As is common with first-time panic attacks, I had no idea …

How Meditation Can Help Us Heal from Trauma, Pain, and Loss

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“In the midst of conscious suffering, there is already the transmutation. The fire of suffering becomes the light of consciousness.” ~Eckhart Tolle

I still remember the first day I met her.

I was running a bodywork clinic from home at the time, and she came to me one day for a treatment. Let’s call her Miranda.

Miranda had something about her that I noticed immediately, a palpable sense of peace and clarity that shone through her eyes and radiated out from her very core.

She seemed to be the most spiritually grounded person I had ever come across. I conveyed …

Be Fully Present with Your Loved Ones While You Have the Chance

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“Before someone’s tomorrow has been taken away, cherish those you love, appreciate them today.” ~Michelle C. Ustaszeski

One day after being on a spiritual path for many years, I stood in my art studio, happy to be creating a new painting. Content in my life, I was married to a great guy and raising two young boys that brought me so much joy.

My life was perfect. Well, not exactly, but I definitely had moments of thinking it was, and this happened to be one of those moments.

I had come a long way. Gone were the …

You Have a Choice: Your Future Can Be Better Than Your Past

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“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this, too, was a gift.” ~Mary Oliver

On the January 17, 2000, I was in a car crash. I was living in France at the time. I don’t remember much about the crash. I know that we all walked out of the car relatively unscathed. Shocked, scared, and confused, yes. Injured, no.

I remember thinking that I should probably call my mum and dad back in England. Tell them what happened. What I didn’t know in that moment was that back in …

Having Too Much to Do Isn’t the Problem

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“As soon as you honor the present moment, all unhappiness and struggle dissolve, and life begins to flow with joy and ease. When you act out the present-moment awareness, whatever you do becomes imbued with a sense of quality, care and love—even the most simple action.” ~Eckhart Tolle

As a young girl I danced a lot. I really loved it and so learned every style of dancing available at my dance school (and took up more and more of my mom’s time driving me back and forth to class and making untold numbers of dance costumes for me).

Around my …